Senior Member
Let's say... HYPOTHETICALLY... that you pull some shit and complete ruin your girl's trust. She has no reason to think you're anything but a untrustworthy liar.
You really love the girl and want to show her you can be trusted and you want to make things right.
What can you do??
Looking for some ideas here, cause it's obviously not hypothetical and I'm at a loss.
AR-Platinum Elite- Hall of Famer
All I can tell you is it ain't going to happen overnight. First, let her know that you realize you blew it. Next, give her some space when she acts like she needs it. Then keep your nose clean and hope for the best.
...and if someone tells you to let her screw around to make things even, don't listen to them. All that does is show her what little value you place on y'alls relationship.
Good luck,
AG
There are 3 loves in my life: my wife, my English mastiffs, and my weightlifting....Man, my wife gets really pissed when I get the 3 confused...
A minimum of 100 posts and 45 days membership required for source checks. Source checks are performed at my discretion.
~ Vet~ I like Thai Girls
Forget it. Women never, ever forgive or forget and I don't care what any of them say !!!!
Bossman - AR Monitor
If she meant that much you probably would not have done something to lose her trust. Im not saying your an a-hole. Maybe you just aren't ready to commit to her.
Like Kale said, they never forget. She might do something after the dust settles to even the score.
Banned
Neither do men really, if we really care about the bitch ho. It takes time, das fo sho.Originally Posted by Kale
You can only earn her trust back through your actions. Sometimes smothering her with affection can help. Don't be her bitch, per say, however, think about how you'd want a girl to treat you, to make you feel like you're the one and only special person in your life? Get me drift? Just be a cool ass dude to her from now on. No more F-ups, and use you skills!
Patience is key too, if you doin something right, she won't tell you. Just know in your own mind you doin it right.
AR-Hall of Famer ~Diet Guru~
Nothing.
Women don't 'forgive'... they stockpile.
Our ****-ups come out each year at birthday time, or christmas...
Women never forgiving men is what 75% of the retail sector (and holidays) is based on.
You're ****ed.
Prepare to hear about it, or otherwise suffer for the rest of your life.
Giggity Giggity Giggty!
It would be easier to find a new woman.
"A Dukkit In The Making"
(1) pm Kitty and get her opinion....
(2) what AG said
(3) what sizerp said
"A Dukkit In The Making"
better make sure you know the date and exact circumstances when you first met and sh1t like that and be all romantic about it
Borderline Personality
Nark is wise...
Associate Member
You will think you are making progress and getting somewhere with them and the first argument you have and thats the first thing they will bring up. They will throw it in your face from here on out.
Senior Member
even though it sucks. its best you move on. it will never be the same again no matter how much you try. their are lots of women out their. no matter how special you think this one is.
"A Dukkit In The Making"
Na, he says he loves the girl. doing something "stupid" does not in anyway prove that he "doesn't really love her or wouldn't have done such a thing, etc". and no one here knows how she is behaving. I think letting a girl have a normal reaction is no grounds for dumping her. Besides, going through this will be a learning process. Later on if your relationship continues to be dysfunctional as a result of the incident then you'll consider possibly leaving... my 2 cents
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
Everytime i have a chance to cheat, i run all of this through my head.
The $hit just ain't worth it.
CHEMICALLY ENGINEERED
That is gold.
"Who wants to be Clark Kent, when you can be Superman."
Amen.
Member
couples counseling
"A Work in Progress"
you're screwed
Senior Member
That's some good solid advice dude, thanks.
Thanks everyone.
To clarify, I didn't cheat. I just didn't tell her about some shit from my past that was important for her to know. But now she doesn't trust me and even THINKS that I've cheated.
~AR-Elite-Hall of Famer~
I say you stock her to show her how much you love her.
Senior Member
Stock her?
~AR-Elite-Hall of Famer~
Yeah man, be everywhere she is.....Works like a charm....
Banned
he means Stalk.
~AR-Elite-Hall of Famer~
LOL, good catch.....
Banned
Hehe thought you meant keep her in the pantryLike in cans or something. That'd be freaky
New Member
depends on the girl... but i'd say theres a 98% chance that ur f***cked.
~AR-Elite-Hall of Famer~
LOL, yeah I guess I did to. Like keep her as livestock....Hehe thought you meant keep her in the pantry
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
Herpes ?
Senior Member
Ouch!
Veritas, Aequitas ~
so shes using your past as ammunition against you? not good, and pretty irrational.
she needs to grow up. if youve given her no reason during your relationship with her not to trust you, and she thinks your past is her business to use against you, shes got some issues
Member
That is so true. They will hold it against you FOREVER! Just when you think they let it go it will pop up!
All Natty...Kinda~Winning Member Transformation Contest!
kale and almostgone are pretty spot on here...
"A Dukkit In The Making"
that's what i was thinkin too.
still. the past is past. it's BS. I say just lay it out: she should either deal with it and accept you or get lost.
Associate Member
i totaly agree. Even if they say they forgive or forget about something, they will always bring it up sooner or later again as an excuse or something to make you feel like shit.
Member
....
Member
It doesn't even matter if you stay with them... If you break up and remain friends somehow, they still pull that shit just to play the guilt trip on you... Coniving bitches!
Retired AR Monitor
this is the best info here so far.
she has major issues if she holds onto the past. sounds like you knocked some girl up a few months ago or a year ago and found out you have a kid or something like that? either that or some std's... man im not sure what else....were you engaged or married and you didnt tell her? lol sorry im nosey, just saying that the past is the past and if she cant let go then let her ass go. F that, she needs to grow up if she is acting like this!
Stupid
i think it's hard to gain trust back completely, no matter what, from this point forward it will never be the same, she can never not wonder about what you are doing or if she can trust you. Basically if you are trying to gain trust back you don't get to argue back about things, you don't get to be on the defense when she asks you multiple questions or not you threw that right away when you lost her trust the first time.
I think I'm too forgiving at times but I'll never forget how I was hurt and that sometimes is harder than learning how to trust again, but somebody who supposedly loves you, shouldn't hurt you and lose your trust.
Anabolic Member
Yeap, women are experts at remembering every little bad thing you have done, and in an arguement they will quote date, time and location of everything, even when you have forgot they won't, never, they will use it for ever....period
Associate Member
MAN,
Alot of men **** up. Its not the end all. Yeah, you'll here it, less and less occasionally forever, just don't be a defensive dick, give her space and be a good guy here forward. If you did give her herpes or some shit, go on a herpes cruise bro, you're done.
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