To Cheat or Not to Cheat?

[vpchill]

Ok guys this is going to be a little long becuase I would really like to know what most of you think.
I started this thread because another member posed the question 'Why cheat when I could be single and still see other women'. This has actually boggled my mind all day. I really dont know why I cheat. I love women and women love me was my only response.
I will now go into depth so you can better understand me and maybe give me sound advice. Im 31yrs young, I have been to the bottom as well as the top of lifes little adventures. I have been with many women over my years (So many at my age I now find it sort of embarrasing) I am an attractive guy and never have had an issue with women. I am overley confident and aas has actually (If possible) increased my confidence. Where as before I felt I was a King, I now feel like I am a god.
Heres the issue, Im not emotional. Ive never really known emotions except for the love I have for my kids. So I really cannot relate to how people fall in love and all that. Im married (currently getting divorced) Have 3 kids with 3 different women. I have always had something that draws women to me. I in turn love to have sex, ALOT. I dont like that I have slept with so many women or will sleep with more. Yet I convince myself that Im living a dream. I have been with models, singers and actresses. I have been with women that most men only see in magazines or wish they could have. My travels through life have taken me from the streets, to being an athlete, back to the streets and I have done some music. Now I am a total square yet I still get noticed by many women.
My father was married to my mother, yet as far back as 5yrs old I can remember hanging with his girlfriend who was part of my life forever. I asked my sister who is the female version of me. She has been taken around the world and has had athletes and wealthy business men chase her. I asked her, why cant we settle for one person? Her response, " We are our fathers children" Im not sure if one woman can satisfy me. Ive been lucky enough to never have had an std. I just love sex. Im currently living with my girl. We were on the verge of breaking up a month ago because I wanted to be single. Yet she wanted to work it out so I am trying. I sat and discussed life with my father before he passed. He explained that he only stayed married because of his kids. He was a ladies man, I witnessed it 1st hand.
Im not sure what Im asking, yet at this very moment I have women who will pretty much do anything and everything for me. Why? Im not sure. My Looks? My confidence? The Sex? I duno about the whole sexaholic thing. Is this a real problem that most people have? Can anyone relate to what Im goin through?
I would like nothing more to be faithful, yet as of now I just dont see it. I got married and was faithful for almost two years before we split. My wife calls me a year after we been seperated and tells me she "Cheated, because she thought I was". Now is that what loyalty gets you? Im actually being faithful and you cheat?
If anyone has any suggestions, comments or criticisms feel free. Im just looking for an answer to why I am the way I am. Im the 1st to admit Im a complete asshole, yet Im an overall goodguy.

[FranciscoG]

Ok guys this is going to be a little long becuase I would really like to know what most of you think.
I started this thread because another member posed the question 'Why cheat when I could be single and still see other women'. This has actually boggled my mind all day. I really dont know why I cheat. I love women and women love me was my only response.
I will now go into depth so you can better understand me and maybe give me sound advice. Im 31yrs young, I have been to the bottom as well as the top of lifes little adventures. I have been with many women over my years (So many at my age I now find it sort of embarrasing) I am an attractive guy and never have had an issue with women. I am overley confident and aas has actually (If possible) increased my confidence. Where as before I felt I was a King, I now feel like I am a god.
Heres the issue, Im not emotional. Ive never really known emotions except for the love I have for my kids. So I really cannot relate to how people fall in love and all that. Im married (currently getting divorced) Have 3 kids with 3 different women. I have always had something that draws women to me. I in turn love to have sex, ALOT. I dont like that I have slept with so many women or will sleep with more. Yet I convince myself that Im living a dream. I have been with models, singers and actresses. I have been with women that most men only see in magazines or wish they could have. My travels through life have taken me from the streets, to being an athlete, back to the streets and I have done some music. Now I am a total square yet I still get noticed by many women.
My father was married to my mother, yet as far back as 5yrs old I can remember hanging with his girlfriend who was part of my life forever. I asked my sister who is the female version of me. She has been taken around the world and has had athletes and wealthy business men chase her. I asked her, why cant we settle for one person? Her response, " We are our fathers children" Im not sure if one woman can satisfy me. Ive been lucky enough to never have had an std. I just love sex. Im currently living with my girl. We were on the verge of breaking up a month ago because I wanted to be single. Yet she wanted to work it out so I am trying. I sat and discussed life with my father before he passed. He explained that he only stayed married because of his kids. He was a ladies man, I witnessed it 1st hand.
Im not sure what Im asking, yet at this very moment I have women who will pretty much do anything and everything for me. Why? Im not sure. My Looks? My confidence? The Sex? I duno about the whole sexaholic thing. Is this a real problem that most people have? Can anyone relate to what Im goin through?
I would like nothing more to be faithful, yet as of now I just dont see it. I got married and was faithful for almost two years before we split. My wife calls me a year after we been seperated and tells me she "Cheated, because she thought I was"An old friend used to tell me you are either doing the fvcking or getting fvcked around on. Now is that what loyalty gets you? Im actually being faithful and you cheat?
If anyone has any suggestions, comments or criticisms feel free. Im just looking for an answer to why I am the way I am. Im the 1st to admit Im a complete asshole, yet Im an overall goodguy.

Over-all, be 100% honest, do you think you have made a mistake by cheating before and if so what was the mistake?

I am a few years older than you and have had many experiences myself. I am curious about your response.

[vpchill]

Over-all, be 100% honest, do you think you have made a mistake by cheating before and if so what was the mistake?

I am a few years older than you and have had many experiences myself. I am curious about your response.

I have cheated, Not while I was with my wife though. I took marriage very seriously. I didnt sleep with anyone else until we seperated. Now I choose to be single because of my affinity for dealing with numerous women. I am just a little lost as to if I have a problem or is this just normal to some people.

[vpchill]

I just dont think relationships are for me. Ive tried them. Right now with my girl, I feel Im only here to help pay rent/bills besides being here for my son. I am not in love. I love her but I dont know what being in love is.

[collar]

perhaps its a lot easier for you to be single, or to just not have attachment.

because maybe marriage serious relationships are just a lot of work to you.

also maybe cause you have been married and your wife has cheated on you, you dont want that happening to you again.

perhaps to pride, to self worth or just an ego thing.

or even deep down it did hurt you, but your just not really aware of it and choose to deal with it that way.

but just going out there and enjoying yourself with as many women as you can.

[FranciscoG]

I have cheated, Not while I was with my wife though. I took marriage very seriously. I didnt sleep with anyone else until we seperated. Now I choose to be single because of my affinity for dealing with numerous women. I am just a little lost as to if I have a problem or is this just normal to some people.

When I reflect back I do not regret the sleeping around and general whoring.

I do regret some of the choices that I made during my marriage which had negative effects. I seek to change those actions. Once I got divorced I swore off alcohol 100%; it was a negative factor.

As for cheating during marriage. Ohhhh that one is a hard one.

This was my second serious relationship. I never thought it would last. I also never thought it was serious in the beginning. I did cheat in the first year.

I guess this is my point in totality.

It sounds like your sleeping around for some reason bothers you. For me this was not an issue. I did what I did. I learned from what I did. But cheating I did not regret. I know weird.

[NVR2BIG1]

#1- Sex is less than 1% of our lives usually (getting it) So why would you let something less than 1% of your life **** up the other 99% of it?

#2- As I was younger, I wanted a huge house, expensive car, tons of girls all over me. As I grew up a little I realized that all I ever wanted was a son. My wife and I tried for 2 yrs, nothing!! I made one last attempt and came off AAS completely for 6 months. The day I said **** it, its not meant to be, and jumped back on cycle is the day she got pregnant. Yes, I honestly think God had something to do with that. My wife helped make my son, why would I want to hurt my sons mother? Thats like hurting him in a way too. I love him too much to only be limited in seeing him every other weekend, thats not enough. I dont want another guy raising my kid either. I want my son to grow up with something many kids dont have, a father at the house.

#3- Great, your a ladies man but now your broke from paying child support/alimony. Hard to get hot chicks when all you have is $$ for McDonalds, meanwhile your ex is getting $$ from you each month AND the new guy banging her, who really won? Not you

#4- You may not realize it or not, but when your out with your family and kids wearing your ring, alot of people are jealous of that. Everyone wants what you have but they can't figure out how or constantly **** it up. That guy in the luxury car w/ the hot chick might be envious of what you have!!

#5- Hot chicks are like dumb dudes w/ money. The dumb **** with $$$ wants the chick with the short skirt and nice rack, the chick in the skirt and rack wants the dumb **** w/ $$$. After awhile the newness wears off and money hungry hot chick starts ****ing broke pool boy, all the while dumbass w/ $$$ is cheating on money hungry hot chick. So its disaster from the start b/ the relationship was never based on any real feelings. Usually dumbass w/ money talks down to money hungry hot chick , sort of like a dog. She puts up w/ it for awhile though b/ he buys her shit, but sooner or later she gets tired of it. Takes some of his $$, ****s someone else.


Am I starting to make any sense here?

[vpchill]

perhaps its a lot easier for you to be single, or to just not have attachment.

because maybe marriage serious relationships are just a lot of work to you.

also maybe cause you have been married and your wife has cheated on you, you dont want that happening to you again.

perhaps to pride, to self worth or just an ego thing.

or even deep down it did hurt you, but your just not really aware of it and choose to deal with it that way.

but just going out there and enjoying yourself with as many women as you can.

Thanx for the input. Well this just happened recently. I didnt get married until I was 27. I dont like the fact that she cheated but my response was more "WOW" Than anger. This may have been the first woman I ever trusted in my life. I never thought she was capable of that. Ive always been detatched and non commital. Since as far back as I can remember Ive enjoyed sex. I lost my virginity at a young age and ever since then Ive just been at it. Do I have a problem? Thanx for ur comment collar

[vpchill]

When I reflect back I do not regret the sleeping around and general whoring.

I do regret some of the choices that I made during my marriage which had negative effects. I seek to change those actions. Once I got divorced I swore off alcohol 100%; it was a negative factor.

As for cheating during marriage. Ohhhh that one is a hard one.

This was my second serious relationship. I never thought it would last. I also never thought it was serious in the beginning. I did cheat in the first year.

I guess this is my point in totality.

It sounds like your sleeping around for some reason bothers you. For me this was not an issue. I did what I did. I learned from what I did. But cheating I did not regret. I know weird.

Agree 100% with the alcohol. Not drinking really changed me. Seeing life through sober eyes is really deep.
Yet my sleeping around doesnt bother me at all and I dont regret anything I do. Just not sure WHY I am like this.

[vpchill]

#1- Sex is less than 1% of our lives usually (getting it) So why would you let something less than 1% of your life **** up the other 99% of it? Agreed

#2- As I was younger, I wanted a huge house, expensive car, tons of girls all over me. As I grew up a little I realized that all I ever wanted was a son. My wife and I tried for 2 yrs, nothing!! I made one last attempt and came off AAS completely for 6 months. The day I said **** it, its not meant to be, and jumped back on cycle is the day she got pregnant. Yes, I honestly think God had something to do with that. My wife helped make my son, why would I want to hurt my sons mother? Thats like hurting him in a way too. I love him too much to only be limited in seeing him every other weekend, thats not enough. I dont want another guy raising my kid either. I want my son to grow up with something many kids dont have, a father at the house.

#3- Great, your a ladies man but now your broke from paying child support/alimony. Hard to get hot chicks when all you have is $$ for McDonalds, meanwhile your ex is getting $$ from you each month AND the new guy banging her, who really won? Not you So far this is not me. Because I do right for my kids (they are my world) I havent had these issues, YET

#4- You may not realize it or not, but when your out with your family and kids wearing your ring, alot of people are jealous of that. Everyone wants what you have but they can't figure out how or constantly **** it up. That guy in the luxury car w/ the hot chick might be envious of what you have!! I have to agree

#5- Hot chicks are like dumb dudes w/ money. The dumb **** with $$$ wants the chick with the short skirt and nice rack, the chick in the skirt and rack wants the dumb **** w/ $$$. After awhile the newness wears off and money hungry hot chick starts ****ing broke pool boy, all the while dumbass w/ $$$ is cheating on money hungry hot chick. So its disaster from the start b/ the relationship was never based on any real feelings. Usually dumbass w/ money talks down to money hungry hot chick , sort of like a dog. She puts up w/ it for awhile though b/ he buys her shit, but sooner or later she gets tired of it. Takes some of his $$, ****s someone else.


Am I starting to make any sense here?

What you state makes alot of sense. I am starting to notice that maybe I do have a problem. I got married because I wanted to settle down and stop the bullshit. It just didnt work out. Living everyday fighting and stressed out is not me. Im just not sure why I am this way.

[NVR2BIG1]

Agree 100% with the alcohol. Not drinking really changed me. Seeing life through sober eyes is really deep.
Yet my sleeping around doesnt bother me at all and I dont regret anything I do. Just not sure WHY I am like this.

its gear talking dude, if your body has 10x the amount of test a normal male produces each wk the forces are strong!

[vpchill]

its gear talking dude, if your body has 10x the amount of test a normal male produces each wk the forces are strong!

lol. Now that would be the case. Yet I was like this before the gear. Yes the gear has made it worse indeed. I will admit that.

[Hunter]

I myself haven't cheated. Maybe you're just modeling your parents? I myself wouldn't be with anyone if I couldn't stay faithful to them, I think its unfair to your partner. Anyway good luck vp.

[QuieTSToRM33]

Never cheated ... most likely never will.

It's not who I am nor who I want to be.

[Hoggage_54]

lol I found a pic of vp...

[vpchill]

^^^^^^ lmaoooooooooo. I'm crying

[Friend]

lol I found a pic of vp...

[Dukkit]

product of our enviroment Vp

from knowing each other outside of this site... we know we are alike in almost all ways. mentality. life experiences. humor. etc

so i can relate to this... in a different manner...
while my mom was a lil bit of a promiscuous person in her younger years... i was not around it. but not having a mother during most of my childhood i believe has caused me to yearn for that love and affection from women.

the quickest means of gratification for those feelings is sex. yes i want to be in relationships. and feel "in love"

but thats so hard. so much work. and not always worth it. as you know... fighting, stress, bills and such

when beautiful woman throw themselves at us... we can have those feelings, albeit for a night, but anytime we want.

its an addition. the affection, attention and gratification

i think our childhoos shaped us... and from there we grew to enjoy what we became too much.

ive cheated on every relaionship. no regrets. its who i am

-dukkit the preggo pouncer

[vpchill]

^^^^ Thanks Dukki. I'm encouraged that I'm not alone. Lol

[Dukkit]

you are not alone! lol

now... come visit me again so we can ravish the philly country side. hahah

[vpchill]

Oh. I'm there in a few weeks Brosky !! May we on and poppin.

[sarasotafloridabrian]

I think a lot of it has to do with addidctive personality. Be it drugs, alcohol, sex, money, or whatever. Some of us have inherent personality traits/disorders if you will. Maybe viewed as assets by one, but liabilities by another.

I have the most beautiful 7 year old boy I could ever have hoped for, but my wife is a constant complainer and always overwhelmed by lifes everyday circumstances. Albeit extremely attractive, I can not find it in me to look at her in a loving sexual manner, although I do love her.

Make sense?

BS. While all of the above is true, I am the selfish prick who wants to screw every chick I meet. Considered average by all means, but certainly charming in my witt, etc.
Perhaps it's the underlying reason my wife is a bitch. Who knows?

What I am certain of is 2 things.
1st. I am an obsessive, compulsive, addictive personality who channels with whatever I am able to that will hurt me least while satisfying my desires. Thankfully not drugs.
2nd. When the pain of doing something is greater than the pain of not doing it, I will then stop or I will die.

No help for resolution, but perhaps for recognition.

[vpchill]

I think a lot of it has to do with addidctive personality. Be it drugs, alcohol, sex, money, or whatever. Some of us have inherent personality traits/disorders if you will. Maybe viewed as assets by one, but liabilities by another.

I have the most beautiful 7 year old boy I could ever have hoped for, but my wife is a constant complainer and always overwhelmed by lifes everyday circumstances. Albeit extremely attractive, I can not find it in me to look at her in a loving sexual manner, although I do love her.

Make sense?

BS. While all of the above is true, I am the selfish prick who wants to screw every chick I meet. Considered average by all means, but certainly charming in my witt, etc.
Perhaps it's the underlying reason my wife is a bitch. Who knows?

What I am certain of is 2 things.
1st. I am an obsessive, compulsive, addictive personality who channels with whatever I am able to that will hurt me least while satisfying my desires. Thankfully not drugs.
2nd. When the pain of doing something is greater than the pain of not doing it, I will then stop or I will die.

No help for resolution, but perhaps for recognition.

Well put. I have to agree. We all have underlying issues that lead us to do the things we do. I tottally dig ur perspective.

[calgarian]

holy CRAP long post....did BO hack into Vp's account?

[vpchill]

Bump.

[sigman roid]

Vp i couldnt read all that you wrote but who are you gonna cheat on

Wife?

GF ?

[calgarian]

Vp i couldnt read all that you wrote but who are you gonna cheat on

Wife?

GF ?

isnt it cheating if he has a GF while he is married
If I remember correctly if u have wife they are called bitches......correct

[vpchill]

Read the whole thing lazy (ugly) Sig

[sarasotafloridabrian]

I love my bitches, lol

[sigman roid]

Read the whole thing lazy (ugly) Sig

Ok i read it and i think your boyfriend would be really hurt if you cheated on him...lol

[vpchill]

Imma fly to london and kick ur ass in the Fog... lol

[calgarian]

Imma fly to london and kick ur ass in the Fog... lol

let me know when u do that I am going bring the video camera.

[sigman roid]

Imma fly to london and kick ur ass in the Fog... lol

hahahaha.

[sarasotafloridabrian]

I don't know if the Sigman means he thinks he's smart, or if he's packing the 229 Model?
Shoot out at the not so OK coral

[Hunter]

I couldn't cheat, but I had great relationship model in parents. I really think how you see your parents interact has a big part of how you behave in relationships.

[Hoggage_54]

^^^^^^ lmaoooooooooo. I'm crying

Funny how vp starting posting again right when Tiger got back into the spotlight after disappearing for a while...

[Hunter]

So all in all vp you just wanna know where da white woman at? That is what your getting at correct?

[Polska]

You're a product of your environment, as someone said. Very well put. Have you considered the fact that you might be a sex addict? While sex addiction is not officially recognized as a diagnosis by the american psychiatric association, it is considered a form of obsessive compulsive disorder.

[FranciscoG]

1st. I am an obsessive, compulsive, addictive personality who channels with whatever I am able to that will hurt me least while satisfying my desires. Thankfully not drugs.


No help for resolution, but perhaps for recognition.

I feel that I am in the same boat.


Ironic, as a single man I have less sexual encounters than as a married man. I thought about that all last night. Just plain wrong...Lol.

[Hazard]

So all in all vp you just wanna know where da white woman at? That is what your getting at correct?

LMFAO! I think VP will take anything with a big fat ass..... LMAO

~Haz~