Hrm, it appears I may be arrested for DV

[J-Dogg]

Not sure what exactly the laws are, and how they work. But if anyone has experience or input, feel free!

To keep it as brief and simple as possible: and brutally honest to keep advice accurate:

-I wake up at 6am every day. My girl at the time was out with her sister, so I text her, if she's stays out past midnight, to stay at her moms with her little sister.

-At 2am, she's drunk pounding on my door. Her sister's car is still running in the drive way, so I just ignore it, hoping she'll leave.

-She comes around to the bedroom window and starts pounding on that.

-I finally just answer the door, she stumbles in pissed off. I tell her, "I have to wake up at 6am, I work 12 hour days, I can't deal with this at 2am".

-While telling her this, she turns around. I grab her shoulder to point her in my direction.

-This sets her off even more. I turn around, to go to bed and walk past her. While going to bed, she runs in front of me, asking "what are you going to do? hit me? Go ahead, hit me, do it (repeats a few time with arm gestures).

-I did. I didn't haul off an punch her, I gave her a wrist slap on the cheek, and told her to shut up, "i'm going to bed".

I went to bed.

-She starts grabbing my things and throwing them on the ground. She grabs my business phone/machine with all my customers info on it and picks it up over her head and says "look what I got, look what I got".

-I get out of bed, cause I've not acknowledged anything at this point. I take the phone/machine from her. I pick her up, open my front door, and force her out the door. She fell when I pushed her out.

-I called her brother to come get her, while waiting she breaks out a window, and tries climbing through. I push her back out and her brother pulls in. I ask him to get her out. he does.

-The next day, the cops contact me, she wants to press charges.

-I explain everything to the officer, he implies that it sounds like she was taunting me. I tell him, I did not do it perfect, but I can't let someone just break everything in my house.

-He tells me, if he thought I was guilty of anything, he'd have to arrest me. That was all he could say as far as being charged. He did say though, he has to turn it over to the prosecutor because she wants to move forward with charges.


I'm not going to sit here and tell you guys, I'm some perfect guy that always keeps his cool. But I'm not a basher, and don't want that label. she got a slap on the cheek for jumping around and flailing in front of me, telling me to hit her, and get pushed out a door for trying to break my belongings.

Problem is, I think if you spank your kids butt, you get charged with child abuse. Spank your girls butt, probably DV. And I'm not sure if the prosecutor will be as understanding as the officer was.

[gixxerboy1]

technically that is dv or assault.

From my understanding i work in a law office prosecutors will usually file charges. They do it to almost protect themselves. If something ever happened again and you seriously hurt her. Their career would be over for not prosecuting you the first time.

Even if the woman doesnt want to follow charges and signs a deposition stating that. 90% of the time they still will to cover their ass.

[Igifuno]

bad deal bro but I think gixxer is correct. I'm assuming its now broken off between you two.. I don't think I need to tell you.. keep it that way. She sounds like a loose cannon.

[J-Dogg]

technically that is dv or assault.

From my understanding i work in a law office prosecutors will usually file charges. They do it to almost protect themselves. If something ever happened again and you seriously hurt her. Their career would be over for not prosecuting you the first time.

Even if the woman doesnt want to follow charges and signs a deposition stating that. 90% of the time they still will to cover their ass.

About what I was figuring.

I know I did not do it exactly as I should have, I guess I feel most people would understand, but I know laws are written in a very strict manner on these terms.

Just upsetting that I could be charged with the same thing as Chris Brown for a little slap that did not even leave a mark and pushing her out the door.

I was a simple bouncer throwing a drunken, rampaging woman out my door I tell ya!

[J-Dogg]

bad deal bro but I think gixxer is correct. I'm assuming its now broken off between you two.. I don't think I need to tell you.. keep it that way. She sounds like a loose cannon.

Ya, it happened last week, and we've not contacted one another and I certainly don't plan too.

I asked the officer, to advice them (her and her family) to not contact me, or come to get anything from my house with out bringing an officer with them.

She's actually a pretty sweet girl, just one of those people that turn into violent drunks, just not something I'm interested in having on my plate.

[Mr.Rose]

You can argue self defense and protection of property (that alone should get you off), i know in some states if someone threatens your property you have the right to shoot them. You shouldn't get charged. Its funny, if she hit you she would be waking away free in no time.

[gixxerboy1]

i dont know what you already told the cop. But keep your mouth shut. Remember anything you say can be used against you.

[Igifuno]

yeah, sounds like you have too much going for you with your carreer and all to worry about something like that. Hope you have some good luck with the matter though... you never know.. did you get an attorney? maybe you should talk to one.

[J-Dogg]

Well I told the officer I forced her out, but not that I slapped her. I know that would be assault regardless of any taunts. Anything I told him, put him on my side because he did not arrest me and flat out said, if he thought I was guilty, and he believed her story, he'd have to arrest me.

The guy next door, also talked to him, explained he heard her yelling and screaming, but never heard my voice.

The officer is certainly on my side, and his report of the info should help. She tried to call me, when he was talking to me, and I told him that. So he went to talk to her after, and she denied it, so he came back, documented the info in my phone too.

My career is going TOO good to worry about this, it's be best year I've had and I'll just go with the "**** b*tchs get money" summer plan.

I do have an attorney, and he actually owes me about 6k for some work we did on his house. I have no problem what so ever, with going to a trial on something like this. The biggest risk is a increased fine.

[DSM4Life]

Don't care who is on your side, if you told the cop what you told us you'd be in jail. You put your hands on her first.

[cobra305]

You should press charges on her for destroying your property and sue the shit out of her. I must also add that hitting a woman was a bit of a pvssy move regardless of how much of a bitch she was being.

[marcus300]

Sounds like assualt, plain and simple. Try and get her to drop the charges otherwise take whats coming.

[J-Dogg]

Don't care who is on your side, if you told the cop what you told us you'd be in jail. You put your hands on her first.

I did not tell him I slap her, just that I forced her out of the house.

I hate how that sounds too "slapped her" because it was not to hurt her, it was to snap the crazy b*tch out of a frenzy. Maybe my morals are off, but if someone is drunk, flailing around in front of you telling you to hit them, daring you to hit them, a wrist slap on the cheek may be against the law, but I feel appropriate.

The same officer arrested her last year for distributing to a minor (her little brother) when he was working under cover.

[J-Dogg]

Sounds like assualt, plain and simple. Try and get her to drop the charges otherwise take whats coming.

I thought about that, but I believe once the report is filed, the defendant can't drop charges, the prosecutor just takes over.

Part of what troubles me about this, is last year she:

-Seriously tried to stab me
-Punched me in my face while I was sleeping
-Broke 2 lap tops, a 42" HDTV and various other items
-Hit me with the remote in her hand while I was laying in bed repeatedly

I never hit her back, I left when she started at me with a knife, anything else, I restrained her and called her Mother to come get her. The girl is just a violent, violent drunk. One of those girls that drinks and can't stand very well anymore and see's red.

AND I've never tried to have her arrested for any of this.

[DSM4Life]

I did not tell him I slap her, just that I forced her out of the house.

I hate how that sounds too "slapped her" because it was not to hurt her, it was to snap the crazy b*tch out of a frenzy. Maybe my morals are off, but if someone is drunk, flailing around in front of you telling you to hit them, daring you to hit them, a wrist slap on the cheek may be against the law, but I feel appropriate.

The same officer arrested her last year for distributing to a minor (her little brother) when he was working under cover.

They are off.

I have had a past g/f dead slap me in the face and i still kept my cool enough to turn around and walk away.

[Hazard]

I thought about that, but I believe once the report is filed, the defendant can't drop charges, the prosecutor just takes over.

Part of what troubles me about this, is last year she:

-Seriously tried to stab me Hint #1
-Punched me in my face while I was sleeping Hint #2
-Broke 2 lap tops, a 42" HDTV and various other items Hint #3,4,5
-Hit me with the remote in her hand while I was laying in bed repeatedly Hint #6

I never hit her back, I left when she started at me with a knife, anything else, I restrained her and called her Mother to come get her. The girl is just a violent, violent drunk. One of those girls that drinks and can't stand very well anymore and see's red.

AND I've never tried to have her arrested for any of this.

^^^^ She gave you 6 reasons to kick her ass out before this happened..... should have listened to them.....


~Haz~

[6ft5]

You need material witnesses and witness to her behavior. And besides if she was incoherent her testimony will not hold up. And filing a police report the next day doesn't sound like it was that serious. If so why didn't she call on you that night sounds like she has no leg to stand on.

[calgarian]

To the OP ...is she Bi-polar?

[toothache]

^^^^ She gave you 6 reasons to kick her ass out before this happened..... should have listened to them.....


~Haz~

You got that right.

[cherrydrpepper]

To the OP ...is she Bi-polar?

I agree she sounds bipolar. Hopefully you don't talk to her anymore but if you do maybe talk to her parents about getting her on medicine and keeping her from alcohol (which would f up the medicine)

[CMB]

Whatever you do don't talk to the cops.

Hell, I might just straight down deny it but you already said you hit her. That probably would have gotten you off right there.

[C-MaN]

I know crazy bitches fvck like champs but after breaking the flat screen her ass would have been out.

[Mooseman33]

Never hit a woman, that was fvking weak man.

Press charges on her, u have to have a complaint on file.

Good luck

[MMArmour]

Im not of the opinion that broads acting in that fashion should be exempt from a response. She not only deserved it, but egged on and urged a much harsher response from you. If you were going to get a DV anyways, you might as well just have laid her the **** out. She got lucky with a slap.

Lets face, shes an intruder. Told to leave. Didnt. Broke property. Was Removed. Attempted to break back in. Removed again. Any other person trying to do this to a mans household should be killed. But because she has a pvssy she gets off the hook? **** that. I feel the slap was entirely appropriate and if you do end up with a DV on your record, for personal satisfaction sake, youll wish you would have just laid her the **** out. **** that. I see entirely how and why this happens. Women can be victimized..yes. They can be over powered and subdued and forced to do things they would enver otherwise do. Those situations are terrible tragedies. But this?? The bitch acted like a ****ing animal, i think you had every right to act in the fashion that you did and shes lucky that thats all you did.

Like i said..if it was my house... well.. you get it.

[gixxerboy1]

Im not of the opinion that broads acting in that fashion should be exempt from a response. She not only deserved it, but egged on and urged a much harsher response from you. If you were going to get a DV anyways, you might as well just have laid her the **** out. She got lucky with a slap.

Lets face, shes an intruder. Told to leave. Didnt. Broke property. Was Removed. Attempted to break back in. Removed again. Any other person trying to do this to a mans household should be killed. But because she has a pvssy she gets off the hook? **** that. I feel the slap was entirely appropriate and if you do end up with a DV on your record, for personal satisfaction sake, youll wish you would have just laid her the **** out. **** that. I see entirely how and why this happens. Women can be victimized..yes. They can be over powered and subdued and forced to do things they would enver otherwise do. Those situations are terrible tragedies. But this?? The bitch acted like a ****ing animal, i think you had every right to act in the fashion that you did and shes lucky that thats all you did.

Like i said..if it was my house... well.. you get it.

she lived their also. So in the law eyes its her house too. If they wanted to be dicks they could tell him to leave and she could stay

[MMArmour]

she lives there too? I didnt see anywhere where it stated that. He said his house, his property, not "ours". And if its her house too why did she need to knock? She doesnt have a key? OP...clarify if she lived there or not.

[gixxerboy1]

she lives there too? I didnt see anywhere where it stated that. He said his house, his property, not "ours". And if its her house too why did she need to knock? She doesnt have a key? OP...clarify if she lived there or not.

i believe from previous threads they live together.
He also said in his post that if you are going to be out past midnight stay at your moms.

I believe it is his house in the fact he owns it alone. But she lives there with him

[JasonT]

OP, sent you a pm

[DSM4Life]

Im not of the opinion that broads acting in that fashion should be exempt from a response. She not only deserved it, but egged on and urged a much harsher response from you. If you were going to get a DV anyways, you might as well just have laid her the **** out. She got lucky with a slap.

Lets face, shes an intruder. Told to leave. Didnt. Broke property. Was Removed. Attempted to break back in. Removed again. Any other person trying to do this to a mans household should be killed. But because she has a pvssy she gets off the hook? **** that. I feel the slap was entirely appropriate and if you do end up with a DV on your record, for personal satisfaction sake, youll wish you would have just laid her the **** out. **** that. I see entirely how and why this happens. Women can be victimized..yes. They can be over powered and subdued and forced to do things they would enver otherwise do. Those situations are terrible tragedies. But this?? The bitch acted like a ****ing animal, i think you had every right to act in the fashion that you did and shes lucky that thats all you did.

Like i said..if it was my house... well.. you get it.

If he grabbed her and brought her outside that's a different story but to hit a women, no excuse. If you couldn't exscort her yourself call the cops.

If it were my sister and someone laid a hand on her ,even a "wrist slap" trust me it would end a lot worse for the other person. Not worth it.

[MMArmour]

If he grabbed her and brought her outside that's a different story but to hit a women, no excuse. If you couldn't exscort her yourself call the cops.

If it were my sister and someone laid a hand on her ,even a "wrist slap" trust me it would end a lot worse for the other person. Not worth it.

You can think of NO excuse under any circumstance? I certainly can. But aside from that, the OP is human. Do I believe that there are better ways to deal with this situation? Certainly. But do I think she is lucky he had the presense of mind to only slap her? Absolutely. This bitch thinks she can run around being a drunken and violent sociopath and all she gets is some arrest charges? **** that. She had it coming. Unacceptable behavior on her part. Putting myself in this position, i can absolutely empathize with his decision making. He didnt strike her with force to inflict pain or injury. If that was his intent....he'd have done much worse.

One thing we can be sure of is that if he hit her with ANY kind of force (as to inflict injury or bodily harm) she would be bruised (at the very least) and the cop wouldnt be asking him any questions except "Do you have any weapons on you?" while he hand cuffed his ass. She is fine. She could have gotten worse and I wouldnt have blamed him if he had.

[DSM4Life]

MMA step away from the law. Any man who hits a women in the face is a straight up p****.

[JasonT]

^^^ what if she's a black belt and is beating the sh!t out of you (no homo)

[MMArmour]

So if I hit her in the stomach its all good?

[MMArmour]

JasonT..that avy man....i think i just shot a load of knuckle babies in my pants

[DSM4Life]

So if I hit her in the stomach its all good?

If you hit a chick period.

[D7M]

If you hit a chick period.

what if you hit a chick who used to be a guy, but had an operation?

[JasonT]

If you hit a chick period.

didn't answer my question...what if she's kicking your ass?

[Matt]

Cut her throat and bury her in the back yard...

[gixxerboy1]

Cut her throat and bury her in the back yard...

a wood chipper works well

or so ive been told

[DSM4Life]

^^^ what if she's a black belt and is beating the sh!t out of you (no homo)

That's a different story. If a girl is attacking me with a knife all bets are off but f she is just annoying me ? No hit.