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    Interesting article on BPD

    This was taken from another site, but it was probably one of the most helpful articles I have read on my situation with my wife. Her Dr. diagnosed her a year ago as bi-polar and she blew him off thinking he was crazy, but I swear reading this article on BPD was like living in my footsteps. I guess it makes me feel better to know, there was a part of her that may have truely loved me at one point, and i wasn't completely used like I feel. Anyway read if you're interested.


    Quote Originally Posted by Mintiya View Post
    Hi all,

    I have noticed an influx lately of people involved in relationships and break-ups with a partner who has diagnosed(or not) BPD. Given that I was a sufferer for many years, I'd like to share some things with you. I don't pretend to know all there is about the disorder nor do I speak for everyone that has it. Some things may be quite similar at the core, but folks with BPD are still individuals, and do things differently. But I did spend years in therapy and around many that have BPD, so I am hoping that maybe some of my words could help you. It took me a long time to be able to admit these truths. I apologize if I offend anyone that suffers from it. BPD is a complex and devastating mental illness, I understand that completely. It is just as devastating for the people in our lives. I would also like to add that I am speaking of those who are NOT working on themselves/being treated.

    First things first, I want to tell you -

    This is not your fault in the way you think it is

    Your (ex)partner and their problems are independent of you. You have nothing to do with the fears of abandonment, specifically. You could hole yourself up in the house, cut off all outside social contact, cater to every bizarre request and demand, and you will still be suspect of abandoning your (ex)partner. It is a deeply ingrained fear.

    You cannot be the "special one"

    You will not be the magical one to break down their walls. You could be God himself, it doesn't matter. "Maybe if I just give in some more, maybe they just need some more time, maybe they just need some more love, I suppose I don't REALLY need to be speaking to this friend they get jealous over..." No. The effects from such things are effective only momentarily, it's fleeting. Fault will be found and new loopholes of ways for you to possibly abandon them will, too. So as you can see, you're pretty much screwed no matter what you do. The fear is THAT intense and irrational.

    The next person is not getting a better deal than you did

    It may look peachy and rosy right now. Well, of course it will. Wasn't it for you two in the beginning as well? No, this person doesn't have something you lack. No, you weren't the evil mongrel. No, this new person isn't the magical one(see above). No, your ex didn't change overnight.

    A large majority of folks with BPD have difficulty being and staying single. For myself and for many sufferers that I know, it enforces the pre-existing worthless feeling. Being with someone assures them they are likable, lovable, worth something. They do not know how to self-love. But eventually, all the feelings of self-hate rise to the surface and there is no fighting it off, because BPD sufferers are like emotional hemophiliacs.

    I am sure the biggest thing noted is failure to take responsibility for their actions. People with BPD are not typically delusional; they also have a sense of morale. But there are several reasons for the lack of responsibility. 1). Black and white thinking = In their world, good people do not do bad things/make mistakes. If they do, this usually shifts them into the BAD PERSON category. A person with BPD cannot simply emotionally bear the thought of being an even worse person than they already think they are. 2). They genuinely do not see anything wrong with what they're doing, as YOU may have been labeled the bad person(or "painted black") by them, and they only feel they are defending/protecting themselves from being hurt even further.

    High Functioning vs. Low Functioning

    Some will note their s/o has an active social life, holds a steady job and is quite successful. Generally they appear put together and competent. It is the home life that suffers greatly. They're generally well-respected and much of the rage you've experienced at home ONLY takes place there - At home.

    While there's many 'shades' of BPD, high-functioning seems to be the one that truly fools people. Outsiders may think you're full of crap about the treatment you're receiving. They don't see what you see. Between the manipulation of your s/o and the negative reinforcement you're getting, you may have come to the conclusion that you're crazy. Or that these things are not what they seem at all. Or worse yet, that you have somehow done something to deserve the physical or emotional abuse.

    Low-functioning is more self-explanatory.

    There are no 'better of the two'. They are equally damaging. And many with BPD will swing from one to the other. Periods of calmness only mean the abandonment button is not being triggered in an untreated person. There is no magical overnight change. The behaviors are learned and practiced over time; they cannot simply be undone.

    Your partner did love you

    Sometimes it's easier to believe they never did. After all, what kind of whacky ass display of love is THAT? It is what they know.

    Untreated BPD are not capable of sustaining mature adult love. While they have grown up physically and mentally, emotionally they have not. Much like children. So you may be staring at a beautiful, incredibly intelligent and successful 30something woman, but in her heart she is 5. She has not healed from past wounds. Emotionally, she is stuck in that time. She wants a maternal or paternal love, unconditional, never leave no matter what boundaries she tests, no matter how many times she manipulates you to get you to prove your worth, your love, your staying power.

    You cannot provide that. You should not HAVE to provide that. If you try, you will lose all sense of the person that you are.

    And that is only part of why the break-up is so difficult. I'm betting you felt as if you met your soul-mate, at first.

    Understandably so. You were adored. You were placed on a pedestal. You seemed to share so many common interests, were on the same goal path. The sex was possibly amazing. They seemed so completely in tune with your needs. You heard everything your soul has been yearning to hear.

    It may have lasted a little while or even a long awhile. But undoubtedly, at some point, it went downhill. You were discovered for what you really are; a flawed human completely capable of abandonment. Maybe you didn't return a text quickly enough; maybe you got frustrated at something they said and hung up the phone; maybe you didn't get back home at the time you said you would.

    In the mind of a person with BPD, these are DANGER SIGNALS. These don't convey what you might be trying to communicate - That you're frustrated or busy. They hear "He must have found someone else", "He hung up on me, he hates me. He's going to leave. NO, I will not let him hurt me first, now HE'S gonna feel what I'm feeling", etc, and then come the rages.

    Your mind is a whirlwind and all you want to do is make it better; all you want to do is go back in time and fix whatever it was you think you did wrong, and all you want is to bring back that adoring partner.

    You hang on everytime you're ready to throw in the towel because you're thrown crumbs; promises of change, promises to stop the name calling or the hitting, promises to stop the insults, the raging. And for awhile, it was probably ok - Because your partner didn't feel safe, and the risk of losing you WAS COMPLETELY REAL THIS TIME.

    While the threat sends them into overdrive, they are on their best behavior because they are soothed by your willingness to stay - High off it, if you will. They genuinely mean it when they make those promises - But in their nature without some help, they simply cannot keep them.

    If you have finally let go, you've got a lot of healing to do. Many partners of those with BPD will at some point recognize patterns of co-dependency; needing to fix, needing to be the saviour; needing to be needed. Learning about BPD is important; it will help you understand a bit more for then AND what to avoid in the future, but there is such a thing as TOO MUCH. By continuing to intently focus on BPD for the long haul and search for the answers(many of which you will never find), the power is still left in their hands and you are still feeding your co-dependency, indirectly. And if you avoid that issue by focusing on someone else's, believe it or not you will find yourself in the same kinds of relationships you're studying to avoid. You likely sacrificed much of your time and energy in this relationship - You can't take it back, but you certainly can make a promise to devote THAT much time and energy on the person who needs love and tenderness right now - YOU.
    Last edited by D3m3nt3d; 08-24-2010 at 07:42 PM.

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    Atomini's Avatar
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    This is really interesting. I had an ex who was bi-polar.

    Never dealing with that crap again.

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    This was probably authored by cal. He likes the bipolar ones

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    dad has it probably never diagnosed, but its gotten to a point id rather leave the house than see his face when he comes home. never seen someone make hole family cry or hate him over a cold peiece of chicken..next day ofc hes fine lol, gives me a bunch of money to pretend it never happend lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by Atomini View Post
    This is really interesting. I had an ex who was bi-polar.

    Never dealing with that crap again.
    I dated a bi polar who tried to kill herself and it destroyed half her brain. I visit her in a nursing home.

    One of my close friends tried to set me up with a girl a few months ago. It came out that she is bipolar. It was all I could do to not smash his face in for being so ****ing stupid.

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    It looks to be caused by improper cell membrane permiability. What would cause that? Not the right nutrients going to the cells. What would cause that ? Think leaky gut...

    The amount of mental conditions that are a direct result of bad intestinal health is simply amazing.

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    Actually BPD is usually stemmed from some form of abandonment. In which my wife did infact have, along with daddy issues, history of depression, abuse, cheating mother etc.

    It was just crazy to see how it seemed to fit my wife so well. Alot of times BPD and Bi-polar are misdiagnosed, usually because a lot of BPD'ers generally have bi-polar as well.

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    Our ability to deal with "abandonment" and emotional problems lies in our hormones and the ability of our body to help the mind yes the other way around as well.

    But if you have iGG food intolerences and a bad hormone profile no happy thinking is going to be able to help you.

    BPD
    OCD
    ODD
    ect
    ect

    Are all just labels.. At the end of the day they describe symptoms and are labelled with a tag to suit insurance companies and the pharmacutical industry.

    The cause or root of the problems are never looked into because of a few reasons.

    1. Half the people you are delaing with dont know
    2. They dont want to know

    You would be amazed what things simply go away when the cause of those problems is addressed...




    Altern Med Rev. 2004 Jun;9(2):107-35. Pub Med
    Bipolar disorder and cell membrane dysfunction. Progress toward integrative management.
    Kidd PM.

    Abstract
    Bipolar disorder (BD) is characterized by periods of abnormally elevated mood (mania) that cycle with abnormally lowered mood (depression). Multiple structural, metabolic, and biochemical abnormalities are evident in the brain's cortex, subcortex, and deeper regions. This disorder is highly genetically conditioned but also highly susceptible to environmental stressors: prenatal or perinatal insults, childhood sexual or physical abuse, challenging life events, substance abuse, and other toxic chemical exposures. Its high morbidity, lost productivity, and suicide risk place a great toll on society. Since World War II, BD has been steadily worsening with earlier age of onset, greater intensity of symptoms, and development of drug resistance. Incidence in children is rising and misdiagnosis is common. Disciplined management of the many risk factors is essential, including cognitive psychotherapy and support from family and community. Lithium has been the foundational treatment, followed by valproate and other mood stabilizers, antidepressants, and anticonvulsants. Several single-nutrient and multinutrient supplements have also proven beneficial. Controlled, double-blind trials show multinutrient combinations of vitamins, minerals, orthomolecules, herbals, and the omega-3 fatty acids EPA and DHA to be effective monotherapy. The molecular action of lithium and valproate converge with nutrients on the level of the cell membrane and its molecular signal transduction systems. This emergent, unified rationale presages effective integrative management of bipolar disorder.
    Last edited by n00bs; 08-25-2010 at 07:00 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by n00bs View Post
    Our ability to deal with "abandonment" and emotional problems lies in our hormones and the ability of our body to help the mind yes the other way around as well.

    But if you have iGG food intolerences and a bad hormone profile no happy thinking is going to be able to help you.

    BPD
    OCD
    ODD
    ect
    ect

    Are all just labels.. At the end of the day they describe symptoms and are labelled with a tag to suit insurance companies and the pharmacutical industry.

    The cause or root of the problems are never looked into because of a few reasons.

    1. Half the people you are delaing with dont know
    2. They dont want to know

    You would be amazed what things simply go away when the cause of those problems is addressed...
    I will not argue that some of the problems are caused by hormones, I agree. I will say however my wife had no food intolerances, or intestinal issues....hell I never even heard her pass gas

    Like ever! I don't even know if the girl shit

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    Quote Originally Posted by stack_it View Post
    This was probably authored by cal. He likes the bipolar ones
    no it wasnt ,but man isnt that article hit the nail in the head...been there done that never again....

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    I will not argue that some of the problems are caused by hormones, I agree. I will say however my wife had no food intolerances, or intestinal issues....hell I never even heard her pass gas

    Like ever! I don't even know if the girl shit

    Increased intestinal permiability you can have it and not know . I had it for 12 years....

    Never knew i had problems just kept tacking antidepressants.

    Got my iGG intolerance results back last week.

    Guess what they are?

    chicken
    beef
    wheat
    whey
    all dairy
    eggs


    All my staples..


    Anyway the fact is she had problems however you guys were just not aware/informed about them.

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    Quote Originally Posted by n00bs View Post
    Anyway the fact is she had problems however you guys were just not aware/informed about them.
    Exactly. Seems to me as long as she stays in denial and seems to think everyone else she dates was the problem, she will always have them. The closest to good about any of her ex's I ever heard her say was 'they weren't all bad guys i dated, things just didnt work out'. Anyway the last four people, myself included - it was everything WE did wrong, and why SHE felt 'unhappy' and wanted to leave.

    That article atleast describes why I felt I was walking on eggshells, and no matter how much I did or sacrificed, it did not seem to help, or matter.

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    Stop hating on us

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    Quote Originally Posted by MaNiCC View Post
    Stop hating on us
    Nah bro, this was written by a BPD'er...no flaming intended. If anything, it made me feel sorry for my wife dude to be honest.

    For the first time since we separated I went to bed last night and actually prayed for her happiness. Regardless if I feel our marriage was a sham or not, somewhere in these yrs together, I did see a good person inside of her, and if she can find a way to get herself together, well, it may be too late for her and I - but it can only benefit our child.

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    Nah bro, this was written by a BPD'er...no flaming intended. If anything, it made me feel sorry for my wife dude to be honest.

    For the first time since we separated I went to bed last night and actually prayed for her happiness. Regardless if I feel our marriage was a sham or not, somewhere in these yrs together, I did see a good person inside of her, and if she can find a way to get herself together, well, it may be too late for her and I - but it can only benefit our child.
    if she is a bi-polar she wont be able to get herself together...I tried that with someone screwed my head BAD.

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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    if she is a bi-polar she wont be able to get herself together...I tried that with someone screwed my head BAD.
    Well her Dr said she was, and she refused to take medicine. She doesn't feel depressed now, she feels happy, it was only when she was at home...which the article clearly states that this is a sure sign of High Functioning BDP. Alot of times it's hard to tell the difference between bi-polar and BPD, because a lot of times the person has both, so she may or may not have bi-polar, or perhaps both.

    One things for certain, she has all the clear signs of BDP...something is wrong with her anyway you slice it.

    But you're right, she has screwed my head bad, my self esteem, everything. But over time it will mend back. It's only because she took her childish personal shots, I guess because it makes her feel better.

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    Well her Dr said she was, and she refused to take medicine. She doesn't feel depressed now, she feels happy, it was only when she was at home...which the article clearly states that this is a sure sign of High Functioning BDP. Alot of times it's hard to tell the difference between bi-polar and BPD, because a lot of times the person has both, so she may or may not have bi-polar, or perhaps both.

    One things for certain, she has all the clear signs of BDP...something is wrong with her anyway you slice it.
    and she wont take madication for it anti D and lithium are the medication for it which ur wife will not take and will make ur life miserable or someone's else cause u r out of that crappy relationship...someday i will tell u the story....some day

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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    and she wont take madication for it anti D and lithium are the medication for it which ur wife will not take and will make ur life miserable or someone's else cause u r out of that crappy relationship...someday i will tell u the story....some day
    Well enlighten me, tell me the story. I agree it was a crappy relationship, but the end wasn't as bad as it was a few months prior. Maybe she was cheating then? Who knows, I know once we went to fvck finally, if she was cheating, my shit wouldn't go in so that tells me enough

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    Well enlighten me, tell me the story. I agree it was a crappy relationship, but the end wasn't as bad as it was a few months prior. Maybe she was cheating then? Who knows, I know once we went to fvck finally, if she was cheating, my shit wouldn't go in so that tells me enough
    Some day I promise not today.....I am trying to bang 2 chicks one after another that is more important...

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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    Some day I promise not today.....I am trying to bang 2 chicks one after another that is more important...
    Understood

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    Look for a book called gut and phsycology syndrome, also ultramind solution.

    Explains some things, and may be of benefit to BPDers.

    Best of luck

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    Quote Originally Posted by n00bs View Post
    Look for a book called gut and phsycology syndrome, also ultramind solution.

    Explains some things, and may be of benefit to BPDers.

    Best of luck
    Thanks bro, but we are separated and she has already painted me 'black' no matter how great i was to her.

    I've heard it all tonight, i couldnt handle my job, even tho I did that job AND another job at the same time. I was a jerk, im an ass, im a ***** because i wont answer her calls etc....now im being accused of screwing my daughter over because I layed down with her when she went to bed. Nothing I ever did for her was enough, because she either has BPD or outright used me. It could go either way, but she played an awesome role as a wife and girlfriend if her whole intent was to use me. Either way she is psycho, and is trying to convince herself I am the bad guy after all i did was bust my ass and do everything i had to for my whole family, hell and hers too...her mom and brother moved in as well.

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    This was taken from another site, but it was probably one of the most helpful articles I have read on my situation with my wife. Her Dr. diagnosed her a year ago as bi-polar and she blew him off thinking he was crazy, but I swear reading this article on BPD was like living in my footsteps. I guess it makes me feel better to know, there was a part of her that may have truely loved me at one point, and i wasn't completely used like I feel. Anyway read if you're interested.
    they're not talking about bipolar disorder they are talking about borderline personality disorder. A somewhat similar but nonetheless different disorder, borderline however i believe is considerably worse then bipolar due to it being much harder to treat because it is a "personality disorder" instead of a "chemical one". So medication does not help as much.
    Last edited by Superhero d-bolman; 08-25-2010 at 07:35 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Superhero d-bolman View Post
    they're not talking about bipolar disorder they are talking about borderline personality disorder. A somewhat similar but nonetheless different disorder, borderline however i believe is considerably worse then bipolar due to it being much harder to treat because it is a "personality disorder" instead of a "chemical one". So medication does not help as much.
    Yeah i tried to change the title to say BPD, apparently it didnt change.

    Anyway my soon to be ex wife has the shit, and a few others I promise.

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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d View Post
    Thanks bro, but we are separated and she has already painted me 'black' no matter how great i was to her.

    I've heard it all tonight, i couldnt handle my job, even tho I did that job AND another job at the same time. I was a jerk, im an ass, im a ***** because i wont answer her calls etc....now im being accused of screwing my daughter over because I layed down with her when she went to bed. Nothing I ever did for her was enough, because she either has BPD or outright used me. It could go either way, but she played an awesome role as a wife and girlfriend if her whole intent was to use me. Either way she is psycho, and is trying to convince herself I am the bad guy after all i did was bust my ass and do everything i had to for my whole family, hell and hers too...her mom and brother moved in as well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Superhero d-bolman View Post
    they're not talking about bipolar disorder they are talking about borderline personality disorder. A somewhat similar but nonetheless different disorder, borderline however i believe is considerably worse then bipolar due to it being much harder to treat because it is a "personality disorder" instead of a "chemical one". So medication does not help as much.
    I had the same experience well, not till that point of a child molester but i have been called quite a few things in the past.

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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    I had the same experience well, not till that point of a child molester but i have been called quite a few things in the past.
    Nah I would hope she wasn't calling me a child molestor

    It's our daughter, she was bitching about me laying down with her until she goes to sleep at night. She says its screwing up her bedtime routine.

    I have listened to the girl change story after story, and it's really sad. It went from everything I did wrong, to her not knowing why she didnt love me, to everything I did wrong, to I didnt deserve it (which I damn sure didnt) and that she will never be happy. She just needs help, and I hate me or my daughter got caught in the middle of it.

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