Anabolic Member
What up bros! I've been out of the AR lounge for about 7 months now. Got married in July. LOL Man I've know her for ever but now I don't know if I made the right choice. I love how she treats me, takes care of me and is loyal, honest and smart. The only thing is that she has stopped working out and is now getting fat. I seem to not be attracted to her, I push her to hit the gym with me or take care of her body but she seems to be eatting more. What would u guys do?
Senior Member
Its hard but one day just suck it up and in a nice way tell her. If you dont they wont know alot of times, and some girls kinda quit caring when they get a man
"AR's Personal Trainer"
her friendsOriginally Posted by firmechicano831
New Member
If you don't lay it out, it'll only get worse. A lot of women do just this once they find a guy and get married.
It's gonna be a fight...or a war rather. Mainly because it's a double-edged sword...you want her to care about herself, but if you bitch about her getting heavy she could throw out the whole "you should love me no matter what" bullshit. If she actually does care about you, she'll understand.
VET
i personaly would tell her the truth..if this is how you truely feel then you need to tell her cus there will obviously be problems down the road...it will hurt her when you tell her so try to be tactfull in the way you say it but in the end after contemplating what you said she will eather do something about it or not but at least you warned her so when the merrage deteriorates there will be no surprises...i know trhis sound hartless and cold but at least you gave her a heads up befor cheating on her or whatever....ive been brutaly honest with my wife over the years but we are still together after 17 years and we are both still happy...i say nip it in the butt now...
AR's Whore D'Oeuvre
welcome to hell
Knowledgeable Member
steroids
Associate Member
ya i agree, try to bring it up to her the nicest way possible
AR-Elite Hall of Famer (RETIRED)
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
New Member
If she is already letting herself go then what's gona happen if/when you have kids? Not only will she have an excuse by then but she will try to blame your for it. You let her know the truth now and that it matters to you, then maybe you have shot.
Anabolic Member
I would simply ask her to start exercising with me or alone and make her a diet plan to follow.
If she said no... I would divorce her and find a woman that is fit and takes care of herself.
That's just me... but I understand if you are on a leash and afraid to bark. LoL.
Good luck man!
Banned
Lock her in a bathroom for 30 days with a bag full of celery.
Tell her shes going on a diet or you're divorcing her.
Haha but seriously a few pieces of advice on communication.
NEVER attack a persons behavoir, don't say "you're eating habits are getting out of control" or even hint that she as any problem
with her behavoir. Its a great way to get stonewalled from any future conversations about her weight.
As gay as this sounds what works best is when a person owns their feelings.
So instead of saying "your uncontrollable eating is making you fat", tell her "when you don't eat healthy it makes me
sad because I think you're eating to cover up something thats bothering you... is something bothering you?"
As simple as that sounds its a great way to get her talking about the problem w/out leading her to assume that her
getting fat is the real issue. She might also tell you something important that you didn't know. Maybe work is getting to her/her boss
and she's eating out of stress. But I tend to believe that when you notice any change in someones eating habits its usually motivated by mood.
Chances are she IS getting depressed about something and you need to find out what.
Actively listen to her and get to the base of whats triggering her to eat so much. The best tip I can give you is any time
you wanna open on a conversation about a sensitive topic, its always best to start the conversation in listening mode. Ask her
irrelvant questions before you even say that sentence I wrote before, otherwise it will come off contrived. And then do NOT
focus on her weight as being an issue at all. The issue should be your feelings about why you think somethings bothering
her. This will give you leverage to get info on the issue w/out asking about the issue directly. W/e you do not let her know
its her weight that you're getting at, as that is largely a trap. Approaching it subtlely like this is win win either way. G/luck!
Last edited by Bojangles69; 12-06-2010 at 10:18 PM.
Anabolic Member
Hahahaha Bojan... you really love your GAMES.
I see the problem... I ask about it. If she refuses to tell me what the problem is... or tell me that there is no problem, then I will take it EXACTLY for what she tells me... but still ask her to start exercising and dieting. Of course I would offer my help, but still.
What is the issue with people being open... I just don't get it.
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
You love her for her or for her waist line ?
Beauty fades but dumb is forever.
"Toughest & Best Looking Guy Around Here"
That might work in another forum but people here are fitness enthusiasts. Nobody wants to be stuck with a fat slob for the rest of their life if they spend their time working on their body. Most people here are focused on looking good and expect the same from their partners.
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
Then admit to yourself how shallow of a person you are, divorce her and be done with it all.
Associate Member
You gotta be honest... just be ready to duck when you do it
Anabolic Member
is her mom fat? aunts fat? grandma fat?
ANALbolically inclined "Protein user"
why u want him to fvck them all?
"Toughest & Best Looking Guy Around Here"
No he's just looking out for you browhy u want him to fvck them all?
Productive Member
If she's Italian you are fcuked.Welcome to the shittiest, most expensive, balls aching club in the world!!
ANALbolically inclined "Protein user"
make senseNo he's just looking out for you bro
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