Aversion disorder to alcohol? 2 years now can't make myself drink anything.

[Bojangles69]

This is more of a quality problem than a real problem but I find it soooo fvcking interesting that I literally can not smell or drink alcohol anymore.

I did the whole binge drinking thing in college and loved it. And up untill I was about 26 I'd still hit the bars maybe once a month or whatever. Anyway the point is that I LIKED alcohol and enjoyed myself just lettn loose and having a good time. Some of the funniest stories of my life were obviously when me and my friends were drunk.

So not last new years but the new years before that I guess I partied a little too hard. I had taken 4 tramadol (which I rarely do) before going out that night and noticed after drinking 6 beers I didn't feel anything, not even buzzed, I actually felt incredibly sober. This was going on the ENTIRE night. I started taking shots, drinking more beer, was at the bar dancing and was even getting comments from my friends saying "dude you've been drinking all night but you don't even look/sound drunk". For w/e weird reason the tram made me immune to alcohol that night, and also wired me up like nothing else. But no slurring, no wobbling, not even acting like an idiot or saying dumb shit I basically became the look out that night watching out for all my friends.

4am comes by and most of my friends are passed out sleeping. I'm still up, still don't feel drunk, but this is when I started getting violently ill. I started getting cold flashes and broke out into a nasty sweat. Then within minutes I was shaking terribly and my whole body hurt + it felt like I had an instant migraine. I was inside a warm house and it looked like I was having a seizure I was that cold. But basically my entire body started shaking like you would in a frozen lake, and it went on for hours. I noticed I had made a serious mistake, as the tram was wearing off and out of nowhere within 30mins all the alcohol I had drank that night hit me out of nowhere.
I got sicker than I've ever been and threw up 6+ times that morning (now about 6am in the morning). I was also incredibly drunk and it came on so quick I thought I had alcohol poisoning. I never went to the emergency room although my brother kept convincing me I should, I just didn't wanna deal with the shit. So mind you I'm shaking violently, laying on the floor in the bathroom cause anytime I got up I felt like I just had to puke again, having these weird cold flashes, and at that point decided I might just be severely dehydrated. Downed about 2 liters of water, walk over to a bed and lay down. As drunk as I was I still couldnt go to sleep, and just laid in the bed shaking till about 10am as my brother kept coming in every so often to check on me. Wound up finally falling asleep, woke up about 3pm... oddly with no hangover whatsoever, and I also feel completely fine at this point.

I think I have an idea what happened biologically, but psychologically I now CAN NOT drink alcohol AT ALL. I don't really mind it as I kinda enjoy now having a legitimate reason not to drink, but its one of the oddest things thats ever happened to me before. Its hard to explain what happens, but if alcohol is mentioned to me, or presented to me now in person, my mind ALWAYS snaps back into that state immediately, and I get a tight nautious feeling in my stomach. I become so severely repulsed by alcohol I can't even smell it. I don't even like hearing the word "beer" anymore or "vodka" or anything. I'll be honest in saying I love that this is happened, and have heard about aversion disorders, but does this generally last your entire life?
Has this ever happened to anyone? Is it like a mild form of PTSD lol? I made this thread tonight because one of my relatives had snuck me this weird fruit/alcohol mix
drink tonight as a joke, I thought it was welches grape juice, it was not. I took a sip
and made a fool of myself. I had no idea what came over me but I spit it out all over the table (full of food) and ran to the bathroom and started rinsing my mouth out. Just tasting the alcohol made me feel ill literally the second it landed on my tounge and my mind realized what it was. It was so immediate and so instinctual that I really started thinking about it a lot tonight. I mean I go a good part of my life loving alcohol and out of the blue I can't drink it anymore no matter what. I really use to think aversion disorders were just some mild bs that for the most part you could just get over but that is not the case. It will be 2 years this Jan 1st that this has been going on, and I honestly can't see myself ever having another sip for the rest of my life. I'm not complaining at all like I said, but I also noticed now if a female has had even 1 sip of the shit, I can't go anywhere near her. Her breath alone brings back that state and its really some crazy shit how akward it makes me feel in my head.

Anyway I'm not complaining, I mean I understand psychology, but it really is one of the weirdest things I've ever gone through before. If anyone has any stories at all related to this, I'd really be curious to see it just "wears off" at any point.

[D.Pump]

Ya the same thing happens to me after i have a night where I throwup. Its like my body associates the smell/taste/memories with feeling like absolute shit. For a few nights I dont really want to drink and the smell of hard liquor makes my stomach tighten. I usually stick to beer when this happens since it doesn't seem to bother me as much. It always goes away for me after a few nights. I usually stick to smoking right after a bad night LOL but how long has it been since this happened?

[Bojangles69]

Yeh its been 2 years and the effect is the same.
Its gotten to the point where in my head I egg myself on talking to myself like "come on dude I know you want a beer, its just a measily ****ing beer, you've drank this shit your whole life it doesn't taste that bad.. you're just playing with yourself". But its like once the beer is in my hand, and I smell it, I feel like I hate it, but I don't lol. Its hard to explain like logically I know I don't hate beer, but when its in front of me I just feel like I do. And after this reaction tonight it got even weirder. I had brought the cup to my mouth so fast I couldn't smell it, but then I got the taste in my mouth and the association I guess is just so strong I spit it out w/out a single thought going through my head.
Its crazy because on one hand it seems like a minor stupid bullshyt problem, and on the other hand its actually creating an involuntary reaction in my body. The best way to explain it is I just "don't feel right". Like if I was to walk into a gay bar I might get the same feeling, I just don't feel like I belong and like its not my thing. Its the same thing with any form of alcohol now, I almost feel like I'm recovery now but don't want to be. It really genuinely puts me in a position where I feel vulnerable for no reason at all, when I logically know I'm not vulnerable, but I just feel exposed or like something bad is gonna happen. Man! It sounds so stupid to write out but I just don't understand how that can happen in 1 night.

[D.Pump]

damn two years! thats some serious shit bro that mustve been a bad night. Idk what to tell you but I know that when I feel like I dont want to drink Ill start off with beer since the alcohol isnt so strong and once im a little buzzed its no worry back to normal. Maybe try a drinking a lot of a weak mixed drink? That way you wont taste/smell the alcohol and hopefully once theres a little in your system your body will realize that it actually likes the drunk feeling again. Honestly though plenty of people get by without drinking for one reason or another so if you dont it prob wont kill you but then again nothing like getting shwasted with some bros and bitches

[Bojangles69]

/\ Thanks man I think I am at least going to try again. Because I don't want people thinking I'm a recovering alcoholic or anything, not that its a bad thing but anytime anyone asks me now I give excuses that give that impression. Plus I miss going out and now I avoid bars all together.

Someone actually pm'd me a brilliant idea, and it was pretty close to what you said about the mixed drink. But their idea was to go out one night and not drink any beer or alcohol, but to get myself buzzed/drunk on jello shots. They said if I don't taste the alcohol at all, then naturally I shouldn't react to it. And their whole idea was that its important to break the association that alcohol = death. So if I can get drunk w/out tasting it, and don't get violently ill, I'll make a new association in my mind that alcohol is safe again. So I think I'm gonna try for New Years and see what happens. If worse comes to worse and I wind up spitting the jello out I don't think I'll try again. Its not the hugest deal in the world but it makes me feel like a bit of a bitch the fear I hold towards alcohol now.

I'll give it a shot I think and lets just hope it works! Thanks man.

[thegodfather]

I have not had any alcohol in almost the same amount of time....I have a completely negative reaction to it, almost like an allergic reaction. Once you understand how alcohol is metabolized and how it interacts throughout the body physiologically, it becomes much less appealing. You are of course aware of the side effects that it has on the neurological system, but it has systemic effects as well.

P.S.- answer your private messages dickhead...

[D.Pump]

exactly just gotta make the new association

[stack_it]

I got alcohol poisoning 2 years ago. I was lining up shots of goldschlager, rumplemints, and jaeger. After about ten rounds of that (30+ shots) and almost a fifth of captain I blacked out. I could not even set my tongue in liquid without puking. Ever since then I can't touch those three alcohols and I can't do shots of any kind. If I try to take a shot of water the motion of taking a shot makes me wanna puke. I cansip on straight vodka on the rocks but if I try to shoot it then it's coming back up. In the three days I was sick after drinking I lost 9lbs.

[Bryan2]

You say you don't mind it so I wouldn't say you need to go about changing.

But I did actually have PTSD and it fades after a while if this bares any resemblance.

I agree with above if you want to to change then forcing yourself to drink beer till you get a little buzzed is going to be the only option. It may even take multiple rounds or 'sessions' of forcing yourself to drink until you break the negative association that is tied with it.