Happy Birthday Chuck Norris.

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 01:10 PM

Chuck Norris turned 71 on march 10th.
Holy crap hope I look as good as him when I get to be his age.
Figured we could post our favorite Chuck Norris facts.

Chuck Norris does not need Twitter....he is already following you.

***D7M*** · 03-11-2011, 01:13 PM

Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence.

***D7M*** · 03-11-2011, 01:14 PM

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago. Death is just too afraid to let him know.

**BJJ** · 03-11-2011, 01:14 PM

^^^
Yes, it seems so.

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 01:20 PM

There is no theory of evolution. Only those species which Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

**stack_it** · 03-11-2011, 01:24 PM

Damn I didn't know he was that old.

**drdeath613** · 03-11-2011, 01:26 PM

his birth was for told along time ago they even knew he was going to be hung

also

Chuck Norris didn't invent steroids ; they are a purified form of the sweat off of his hat band.

**Ladyblahblah** · 03-11-2011, 01:55 PM

Chuck Norris once had a boomerang. It was way too scared to come back.

**BJJ** · 03-11-2011, 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by drdeath613

his birth was for told along time ago they even knew he was going to be hung

Poor David, poor Michelangelo.
also

Chuck Norris didn't invent steroids; they are a purified form of the sweat off of his hat band.

Poor David, poor Michelangelo.

**drdeath613** · 03-11-2011, 02:04 PM

Originally Posted by BJJ

Poor David, poor Michelangelo.

lol im glad someone caught it

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 06:44 PM

Chuck Norris and Superman made a bet on who could beat who in a fight......The looser had to wear his underwear outside his clothes.

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 06:45 PM

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 06:46 PM

When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook you die.

**Tigershark** · 03-11-2011, 06:48 PM

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

**scotty51312** · 03-11-2011, 11:47 PM

Chuck Norris's calender goes from march 31st straght to april 2nd cause Nobody fools Chuck Norrris

The big bang theory was just Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking the universe into existance

**Times Roman** · 03-12-2011, 05:40 AM

he's overrated.

Never been a fan.

Short little sh1t. Can't act. Would never have made it in MMA.

**drdeath613** · 03-12-2011, 05:59 AM

says the old man sure your really not mr t and still butt hurt from that butt whooping

**Times Roman** · 03-12-2011, 06:04 AM

wtf?? son, you need to learn some punctuation, cuz what you just said doesn't make sense.

you called me an old man, I understand that.
sure your really not mr T - OK, I think that makes sense, I'm not pretending to be Mr. T
and still butt hurt from that butt whooping - really not sure about that part
are you suggesting Mr. T and Chuck made a movie together? maybe they did. Did all of 5'5" chuck whoop Mr. T in the movie? Ok, maybe he did. But out in the street, Mr chuck weighing 150lbs would have one helluva time with a bloke weighing 250 lbs of lean that knows how to street fight.

Mr T would eat chuck for lunch.... no question.

Again, Chuck is overrated.

**drdeath613** · 03-12-2011, 06:18 AM

Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head

**drdeath613** · 03-12-2011, 06:20 AM

The United States Federal Reserve Bank decided that Mr T’s neck was a much safer place for their gold than Fort Knox

**Times Roman** · 03-12-2011, 06:21 AM

I never thought chuck was anywhere near as quick in his weight division as some of the others. I don't think anyone really thinks of chuck as quick. not sure what they think, other than he has a former USA Karate title, and made a few movies where he pretended to act.

**MBMETC** · 03-12-2011, 10:53 AM

chuck norris is not a karate expert, he only plays one on tv.

**Times Roman** · 03-12-2011, 11:48 AM

I think he was a third degree blackbelt... won a USA title. held it for a couple of years.

back on the block, that's something.... but nationally, he's just one of literally hundreds... bfd

**Tigershark** · 03-12-2011, 11:53 AM

There used to be a street called Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

**Tigershark** · 03-12-2011, 11:54 AM

Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi trucks gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

**Tigershark** · 03-12-2011, 11:55 AM

When the boogey man goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

**Tigershark** · 03-12-2011, 11:59 AM

Just so you know Roman and MBETC.

1968, he won the Professional Middleweight Karate champion title, which he held for six consecutive years.
In 1969, he won Karate's triple crown for the most tournament wins of the year, and the Fighter of the Year award by Black Belt Magazine.
He is only the 3rd westerner to be awarded the rank of 8th Degree Black Belt Grand Master.