my gf wants to hangout with her ex gf

**Hoggage_54** · 07-30-2011, 09:25 PM

To be serious for a minute... I say you go out with her to meet the ex. Maybe you guys will hit it off and you could get a double-bj...

**jbm** · 08-01-2011, 03:48 AM

What's BJ?

**DSM4Life** · 08-01-2011, 05:33 AM

Originally Posted by Hoggage_54

To be serious for a minute... I say you go out with her to meet the ex. Maybe you guys will hit it off and you could get a double-bj...

They are so fun to give.............so i hear...

**goodlifting** · 08-01-2011, 12:34 PM

Originally Posted by Hoggage_54

To be serious for a minute... I say you go out with her to meet the ex. Maybe you guys will hit it off and you could get a double-bj...

dude that would be so badass but real life lesbians don't like penises...porn really is misleading.

**awms** · 08-01-2011, 06:40 PM

Let me ask you somthing? If the ex was a guy would you be ok with it? Have you ever hung out with an ex before? I have and although I didnt want a relationship any more I was still attracted to her and thought about what it would be like to be back with her...now that Im with my current girl friends I dont hang out with ex's because I wouldnt never put my self in a position were I could or would cheat.

Another thing. The reason you are asking us this is clearly because it bothers you that they are hanging out or you wouldnt have posted this....so you should let her know you are not ok with it and she should respect that and understand....she should say "Ok I wont hang out with her then"...if she freaks out then that should be a sign that somthing is up.

**Times Roman** · 08-02-2011, 03:50 AM

i've been down this path before. it's all about maturity and sensitivity. if your partner is uncomfortable with you hanging out with an ex, then you shouldn't do it. and if she gives you any grief about it, then she is thinking more of herself than she is of you. Which is a reflection of her character.

**awms** · 08-02-2011, 10:02 AM

Originally Posted by Times Roman

i've been down this path before. it's all about maturity and sensitivity. if your partner is uncomfortable with you hanging out with an ex, then you shouldn't do it. and if she gives you any grief about it, then she is thinking more of herself than she is of you. Which is a reflection of her character.

I agree with this 100%

**goodlifting** · 08-02-2011, 12:25 PM

Originally Posted by awms

Let me ask you somthing? If the ex was a guy would you be ok with it? Have you ever hung out with an ex before? I have and although I didnt want a relationship any more I was still attracted to her and thought about what it would be like to be back with her...now that Im with my current girl friends I dont hang out with ex's because I wouldnt never put my self in a position were I could or would cheat.

Another thing. The reason you are asking us this is clearly because it bothers you that they are hanging out or you wouldnt have posted this....so you should let her know you are not ok with it and she should respect that and understand....she should say "Ok I wont hang out with her then"...if she freaks out then that should be a sign that somthing is up.

i agree with you, man. it was bothering me and that's why i posted it. i don't have many friends to talk to about it besides my gf.

the tough thing in this situation is to not come off insecure or be immature about it when talking to the gf. like i said before, the reason i don't hang out or see my exes is because they are physically attractive people that i was in intimate relationships with.

my gf just turned 21 so she's kind of at that borderline of getting to that stage of mature understanding. i think she simply didn't take the fact that i might get pissed if she hung out with her ex gf into consideration.

i told her that i take at her past relationship with her ex gf seriously and don't look at it any differently than one she had with a man.

the funny thing is she dated a dude for 3 years or so before she dated her ex gf. she said she would never hang out with him because she wouldn't want to disrespect me. what the fvck, right?

she didn't freak out when i told her that i was uncomfortable with her see her ex gf so i think she's starting to understand.

i would never make her feel like i'm interested in someone from my past and all i want is the same thing from her or anyone i am in an intimate relationship with.

**awms** · 08-03-2011, 12:40 PM

I would be honest with her and just say that you see it the same as if she hung out with an ex who is a guy.

I would also ask her out of curiousity why she feels the need to hang out with her ex? I dont mean to make you worry but chances are she prob still has feelings for her ex even if they are only slight they are still feelings and that is why she wants to hang out with her...of course she wont tell you that but you seem smart enouph to figure this out on your own lol

Also dont accuse her just tell her how you feel and ask her why she wants to hang with her ex...mabey she actually has a good reason...but prob not haha

**awms** · 08-03-2011, 12:44 PM

I have seen far to many of these kinda things go the wrong way...start out innocent and then after a couple drinks and old memories they end up having sex...seen it happen a million times! "dont worry hunny we are just hanging out as friends" then 6 months down the road you find out shes been banging her ex lol

The only reason in the past I have ever hung out with an ex was 1# I wanted to get laid, 2# I enjoy being around her and want to see if maney things could still work out with us.

**SexySweetheart** · 08-03-2011, 08:03 PM

Originally Posted by goodlifting

i've been dating my gf for a year now and she seems pretty cool. just pisses me off every once in a while but what woman doesn't.

she's bi and she had a relationship with a girl for 4 months or so before she was with me. her ex is coming into town for a couple of days and she wants to go get dinner with her or some shit.

now, my gf and i are in a clearly in a monogamous relationship and she says she's still really great friends with this chick. the topic of her hanging out with her has come up before and i've told her i don't have a problem with it if we could have a threesome with her. other than that i don't see why she needs to be hanging out with her even if they aren't having sex.

when my gf's ex comes into town i don't think they will sleep together or anything but it still kinda pisses me off. i'm not intimidated by her ex gf or anything but i just don't see why they need to be hanging out while i'm in a relationship with my gf.

am i being a dick if i tell her that i don't like it?

bottom line, i wouldn't hang out with any of my exes while i'm in a relationship. people you have previously been inside of and been in a intimate relationship with simply cannot be your close friends afterwards...

You would not be a dick if you told her you dont like it.
Your in a relationship, your feelings are just as valid as hers.
In my oppinion if she knew it bothered you on any level she would prob call off the in person visit, and if she didn't ~ I would question why she values the feelings of a person from a previous relationship above the person she is in a current relationship with.
Talk with her or be accepting of the situation is, it would be unfair to be upset with her choices if she doesnt realize how you realy feel. What ever you do, do it in a calm non judging way or you'll throw up her defenses and she will shutdown.
Best of luck
*We all make some level of sacrafices in each of our relationships...its hard to cut off people we once cared for.

and to all the others that have responded....OMG you all crack me up! highly entertaining stuff on here