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  1. #1
    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    1,000 ways to die thread!

    Has anyone ever bumped shoulders with the grim reaper ? This thread was created to share your near death experiences. Click image for larger version. 

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  2. #2
    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    My closest was night diving off the coast of maine for lobsters. I was running low on air and decided to come to the surface. As I came towards the surface I bumped my head on a rock . I then realized I was in an underwater cavern. My dive partner was nowhere in site. I spent the next 15 minutes trying to follow my bubbles to find an exit. Obviously I made it.
    Last edited by xelnaga; 12-04-2011 at 10:01 PM.

  3. #3
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    10+ years ago I was benching solo.... was about 1.5x my weight and went for one more rep..........

    ....didn't make it

  4. #4
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    Last year, rocking climbing in Utah with a buddy of mine. I was about 90 ft. up the pitch when I slipped. 4 of my top nuts and cams stripped. Fell about 60 ft. before the belay caught. Had to clean my pants after it.

  5. #5
    lovbyts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    My closest was night diving off the coast of maine for lobsters. I was running low on air and decided to come to the surface. As I came towards the surface I bumped my head on a rock . I then realized I was in an underwater cavern. My dive partner was nowhere in site. I spent the next 15 minutes trying to follow my bubbles to find an exit. Obviously I made it.
    Oh damn that would be scary. I had a dive partner one time that was terrible at watching the other person or paying attention to surroundings. Sounds like you were a little too focused.

  6. #6
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    Double post

  7. #7
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    I was pissed and called my wife a cvnt

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    carshed my motorcycle not sure how fast the crash was. I was doing about 155 then there was 90ft of skid mark before the crash. So what ever i slowed down too. Hit the curb and went end over end

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    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Oh damn that would be scary. I had a dive partner one time that was terrible at watching the other person or paying attention to surroundings. Sounds like you were a little too focused.
    Cold water, darkness, and small reflecting moon light leads to disorientation - We had a term for it ... but I forget it now.

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    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    carshed my motorcycle not sure how fast the crash was. I was doing about 155 then there was 90ft of skid mark before the crash. So what ever i slowed down too. Hit the curb and went end over end
    Had no idea you were a sport biker. Wow.

  11. #11
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    fvck, where should i start........

    ranges from accidentally ending up on a black mogul ski run (1st time skiing) to a 115mph car flipping incident lol

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    The Bear 79 is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    I was pissed and called my wife a cvnt
    Yeah, that would bring me near death too!

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Had no idea you were a sport biker. Wow.
    are you serious?

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    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    fvck, where should i start........

    ranges from accidentally ending up on a black mogul ski run (1st time skiing) to a 115mph car flipping incident lol
    Ha! Dec. Take your liberties on this thread; I knew you would have some dec contributions !

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    The Bear 79 is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Had no idea you were a sport biker. Wow.
    I hope ur joking / being sarcastic, but if ur not............look closely @ his screen name & think Suzuki...................

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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Had no idea you were a sport biker. Wow.
    errr, eyes forward dear boy

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    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    are you serious?
    Neg.

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    Was riding one day and went to pass 3 cars at once. So i went into the left lane and did not see the on coming car. I was doing well over 125mph. I had no room to get back in the right lane. So my body went numb from head to toe. I went straight at the car.. Luck enough the car saw me and ran off the road into a ditch to avoid me..

    I excepted the fact i was going to hit the car and die!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    10+ years ago I was benching solo.... was about 1.5x my weight and went for one more rep..........

    ....didn't make it
    been there also, took me 15mins to amble the bastid down and off my chest

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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    errr, eyes forward dear boy
    I was practicing sarcasm ... I guess all the newbs here lower your expectation for the average intelligence!

  21. #21
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    I was in my c55. Not sure how fast i was going but someone went to make a left turn in front of me. I swerved and hit the light pole head on. I hit it hard enoug where the car went to flip and the roof hit the light pole and came back down. Thank god i was in a merc. I opened the doors and just had scratched from the airbag.

  22. #22
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    more recently, i was gunning my fireblade up the road, redlined in 2nd hit third, obviously just didnt get the gear home and she flicked out for a split second allowing the revvs to hit max and of course flicked straight back in resulting in an impromptu 3ft wheelie. not pleasant at over 100mph when you're not expecting it and a sure pant changing moment

  23. #23
    dec11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    I was practicing sarcasm ... I guess all the newbs here lower your expectation for the average intelligence!
    hmmm, hard to tell emotion via text, thats what icons are for. bad attempt at redemption dear boy . better to take your dumb ticket and bow

  24. #24
    xelnaga is offline Banned
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    Ticket taken - However, like yourself I never bow!

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    Quote Originally Posted by G-1000 View Post
    Was riding one day and went to pass 3 cars at once. So i went into the left lane and did not see the on coming car. I was doing well over 125mph. I had no room to get back in the right lane. So my body went numb from head to toe. I went straight at the car.. Luck enough the car saw me and ran off the road into a ditch to avoid me..

    I excepted the fact i was going to hit the car and die!

    we do some dumb shit sometimes.

    glad to see you back

  26. #26
    dec11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    I was in my c55. Not sure how fast i was going but someone went to make a left turn in front of me. I swerved and hit the light pole head on. I hit it hard enoug where the car went to flip and the roof hit the light pole and came back down. Thank god i was in a merc. I opened the doors and just had scratched from the airbag.
    i did a nose to boot flip through three hedges and two fields, off'd a cow en route and narrowly had missed a 4ft wide oak tree at the 1st hedge. dont know how i escaped that one to this day, car was mangled beyond marque recognition

  27. #27
    dec11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Ticket taken - However, like yourself I never bow!
    oh, i bow. arrogance is never a good thing

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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Cold water, darkness, and small reflecting moon light leads to disorientation - We had a term for it ... but I forget it now.
    underwater vertigo? Yeah it's easy to get disoriented and panic especially if your partner is not nearby. I wont dive with someone who is not a good partner. I dove for years before getting my license with friends and only got certified a few years ago. I LOVE to dive although I dont get a chance to do it much. Glad you made it.

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    G-1000's Avatar
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    Sometimes lol, I did dumb shit all the time.. I'm just happy im still here to talk about it all.

    Thanks dude, it's good to be back.

  30. #30
    dec11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    we do some dumb shit sometimes.

    glad to see you back
    none of us ever learn on bikes though, helmet on, common sense off. i still think im ghostrider during the 1730 post work rush on the m'way lol

  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    none of us ever learn on bikes though, helmet on, common sense off. i still think im ghostrider during the 1730 post work rush on the m'way lol
    Some of us have more common sense than others though. I have owed 3 bikes. One I never rode, the other two I sold after a short time knowing I was going to kill myself eventually if I didnt.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    none of us ever learn on bikes though, helmet on, common sense off. i still think im ghostrider during the 1730 post work rush on the m'way lol
    To tell you the truth I chilled out a lot over the years. But dont get me wrong, i will still rip shit up.

  33. #33
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gixxerboy1 View Post
    carshed my motorcycle not sure how fast the crash was. I was doing about 155 then there was 90ft of skid mark before the crash. So what ever i slowed down too. Hit the curb and went end over end
    oh, we're talking motorcycle stories now? I've got several. Here's one....

    home on vacation from Korea. big kegger party up in the hills. blokes all get on their smaller motorcycles and haul ass. all about 500cc or so. I get on my big LTD1000 and haul ass. accellerate, brake, accellerate, brake. finally caught up. bloke infront of me swerves wildly in a turn for some reason. I see why, but too late. Large boulder in the middle of the road. About the size of a flat basketball. I'm already scraping peg in the turn when I see it. If i go wide, i'm over a cliff. really cant' turn any tighter. so I broadside the damn thing. I fly over the handle bars, headfirst, sunnyside up, spread eagle. I think I'm doing about 70mph, not sure, but when I hit the rock, it scooted in the street, and made a mark in the assphault. From that mark, to where i came to rest, was almost 100 feet. No helmet. but heavy leather boots, thick leather gloves, thick denim pants, and thick cowhide jacket. Once I clear the cobwebs, I pick my bike up, saddle up, and cruise (slowly) back to the kegger party.

    Palomeres Canyon Road.

  34. #34
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dec11 View Post
    been there also, took me 15mins to amble the bastid down and off my chest
    I wimped out. Started hollerin for my woman. she came out, I still had most of the weight off me, but barely, and shakey, so she gave me enough for me to slide out and away.

    Which is why I don't go heavy when I bench. I always solo, and not about to make the same mistake twice. Which is also why gains come slow for me on the bench. I get decent reps though, but never go for that one last rep that makes all the difference.

  35. #35
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macon_Bacon View Post
    Last year, rocking climbing in Utah with a buddy of mine. I was about 90 ft. up the pitch when I slipped. 4 of my top nuts and cams stripped. Fell about 60 ft. before the belay caught. Had to clean my pants after it.
    Used to rock climb back in the day. Used to put a lot of faith in those "P" tons and those nylon runners. Nothing like hanging 100 feet off the ground by a single "P" tan

  36. #36
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xelnaga View Post
    Cold water, darkness, and small reflecting moon light leads to disorientation - We had a term for it ... but I forget it now.
    Used to dive alot when I was younger. Started when I was 15. Off the coast of N cali one time, was ab diving in the kelp beds. resting on my matt. mask all fogged up, but i felt something grabbing my flipper. I look to see what it was, and Holy Shit! It was a mutha fukkin morray eel attacking my flipper!!! So I haul ass, real scared (ever see the teeth on one of those suns a biches?) back to shore and to safety. Later, my pops asks what the hell had me so spooked? So I tell him about the morray eel attacking my flipper.

    He looks at me real funny for a moment, then a big shit eating grin, then he starts laughing his ass off. I'm like WTF? He said, "Son, that wasn't a morray eel, that was my gray glove trying to clear the kelp from my snorkle, and your flipper kept pushing the kelp back into my mask, so i just pushed your flipper out of the way!"

  37. #37
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    Injecting AAS and getting a little in a vein, Def an eye opening experience

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    Used to dive alot when I was younger. Started when I was 15. Off the coast of N cali one time, was ab diving in the kelp beds. resting on my matt. mask all fogged up, but i felt something grabbing my flipper. I look to see what it was, and Holy Shit! It was a mutha fukkin morray eel attacking my flipper!!! So I haul ass, real scared (ever see the teeth on one of those suns a biches?) back to shore and to safety. Later, my pops asks what the hell had me so spooked? So I tell him about the morray eel attacking my flipper.

    He looks at me real funny for a moment, then a big shit eating grin, then he starts laughing his ass off. I'm like WTF? He said, "Son, that wasn't a morray eel, that was my gray glove trying to clear the kelp from my snorkle, and your flipper kept pushing the kelp back into my mask, so i just pushed your flipper out of the way!"
    Hahahahahaha it's funny what the imagination can conjure up. I bet you can still see it as clear as day. I have seen some big MO FO eels and would not want one getting angry with me.

    We have the worlds largest (supposedly) octopus here. A buddy of mine was diving and saw one of the arm sticking out from under a rock. He put his hand up to it and the sucker was bigger than his hand; not the closest one to the body. He rightfully so decided not to disturb it.

    What is fun is when you are ascending and you see a boat going overhead. Yeah I know all about flags but it seems some people dont.

  39. #39
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    It's been 25 years since I dove last. Really only ever dove with my dad. He was Search & Rescue for the Richmond City Fire Department, which was a side line gig for just being a regular fireman.

    Fond memories of growing up, eating fresh abalone right on the beach. Damn that was good!

  40. #40
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    Same as a bunch of the stories.. A couple of bike accidents... But I have a different story about wen I was taking these huge bcaa supps.. They were huge horse pills and I had a pill cutter and used to cut them in half and on 2 separate occasions I got them lodged in my throat trying to swallow them.. My girlfriend in the next room but I can't breath or get a word out to call for help.. In the minute and a half I was choking I just imagined the newspaper article.. MEATHEAD CHOKES ON PILL in kitchen lol.. I was like oh man.. Finally got it out, and since it was the second time, I just gave the bottle away

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