Should I break up with her

**HitIt** · 01-25-2012, 10:04 AM

too much thinking going on in this thread. find a new (insert favorite noun). 6 billion people in this world. capisce?

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 10:11 AM

No matter how you slice it IMO..... she's more trouble than shes worth.

~Haz~

**Nooomoto** · 01-25-2012, 11:29 AM

With only reading the first post, and not reading the other 3 pages of posts here...dump her. That's hardcore bullshit. It clearly demonstrates a lack of interest in you and your welfare, and that being the case whats the point of the relationship? Peace her out.

**Standby** · 01-25-2012, 11:39 AM

Originally Posted by HitIt

too much thinking going on in this thread. find a new (insert favorite noun). 6 billion people in this world. capisce?

this. to much thinking and talk. a simple thread of him whinning about not getting a post surgery bj turned into women rights and women presidents and women feelings. see razr they turn everything about them! just like your girlfriend!

i know what you need! a boyfriend! there get at it big boy

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 12:02 PM

Originally Posted by juice box

Tell you right now she is cheating on you for sure ..How much to you care about her is the question ? A lot of things you can do if you are thinking about breaking up anyway find another girl 1st and keep banging this girl . If you like her get her phone and gps her ass without her knowing you will no where she is . And can go see what see is doing you no ! But for real bro she is seeing some dude she cant talk on phone WHY BECAUSE SOME LITTLE DUDE IS RIGHT NEXT TO HER !

I know for sure she is not cheating, I knew about the family dinner days in advanced. Her and her sisters had this meeting with a TV network for a show or something, so they went to LA for it the went out to eat after/

Originally Posted by Kawigirl

I'm sorry...Razr. But as a woman...inexcusable that she didn't call you after your surgery. I would be quiet concerned if anyone close to me was going under for anything! So no call...and she was "eating with family". I'm sure her family would have been understanding to at least make a friggen quick call to her bf to ensure he was ok!

No real sympathy...no real concern...no genuine respect.

You have every right to be on the fence with this. If this is how she is now...will she have your back down the road when bigger sh*t hits the fan?

Just my 2cents

Your right, there was no respect, funny today though shes blowing my phone up asking how I am doing, but still has never called.

Originally Posted by jasc

I have to agree with juice. When I first read your post my immediate thought was infidelity. She's out to dinner with her "family" and she can't even call you on her way home? What's the logical reason she can't call? Because someone else is in the car who can't hear the phone call. No disrespect intended bro. You know her better than we do so you have to feel it out, but proceed with caution.

You obviously tried hard to make the appt. and when u said u might not make it, I could see why she may be upset. BUT, you DID make it, you put in the extra effort to be there for her. She should be that much more happy!

She couldn't even make it to your surgery or even pick up a phone? no excuse for that.

Watch out bro. She doesn't seem to be a good mate. From the posts I gather she is A) cheating B) immature C) emotionally needy D) Seems like a head case. Again, no disrespect intended and these thoughts are just based on what's written and is only 1 side of the story.

Slfmade: The more posts I read of yours, the more I like ya. You are dead on with your view points and he needs to put his foot down.

Im going to today

Originally Posted by paulzane

Well what can I say?

Get off this site and sort your life out would be a good start. If you can't sort out something like that then Wtf are you going to do when a real crisis occurs?

Good luck anyway!!

Originally Posted by SlimmerMe

Plain and simple:

She felt slighted by you not being there for her dog. So she wanted for you to know how it feels by ignoring you when you needed her. Called payback.

By not making her feel special enough for you to rise to the occasion to figure out how to deal with her dog by stepping up to the plate in her mind, it caused her to do the same to you to prove a point. Once a female does not feel special all bets are off and the relationship will go down hill from there.

And since so early in a relationship? I would be very wary to continue since it has gotten off to a negative start. And if you do continue you will have to jump thru hoops trying to redeem yourself for quite some time to make her trust you.

Remember. If we feel you are not there for us, we will not make life easy for you. So keep this in mind when dealing with the female sex. Part of our DNA just like you have your DNA of wanting to spread your seed.

Slim I was there for her and her dog.

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 12:03 PM

How do I break up with her, unless she comes to see me I cant do it in person. And I really dont want to do it over texting

**jasc** · 01-25-2012, 12:06 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

I know for sure she is not cheating, I knew about the family dinner days in advanced. Her and her sisters had this meeting with a TV network for a show or something, so they went to LA for it the went out to eat after.

Backroom Casting Couch?

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 12:06 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

I know for sure she is not cheating, I knew about the family dinner days in advanced. Her and her sisters had this meeting with a TV network for a show or something, so they went to LA for it the went out to eat after/

Your right, there was no respect, funny today though shes blowing my phone up asking how I am doing, but still has never called.

Im going to today

Slim I was there for her and her dog.

Originally Posted by Standby

this. to much thinking and talk. a simple thread of him whinning about not getting a post surgery bj turned into women rights and women presidents and women feelings. see razr they turn everything about them! just like your girlfriend!

i know what you need! a boyfriend! there get at it big boy

Nah Man I knew she was not going to be there afterwards, she was in LA with her family.. A simple phone call would have sufficed. Plus I told her I love her, like I have many times before and she skated around the return by saying Im nutz, which she says all the time, but I can tell she does not love me.

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 12:08 PM

Why does she deserve any respect if she showed you none?

I'd just tell her what she did was unacceptable and base my next move off what she responds with. If it's ignorant and about her..... I'd say "well that response doesn't work for me. I don't think this is going to workout....."

~Haz~

**Standby** · 01-25-2012, 12:10 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

Nah Man I knew she was not going to be there afterwards, she was in LA with her family.. A simple phone call would have sufficed. Plus I told her I love her, like I have many times before and she skated around the return by saying Im nutz, which she says all the time, but I can tell she does not love me.

dude she is right you are nuts. telling her you love her after 5 weeks? wtf is this grade school? lets be serious here

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 12:11 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

Nah Man I knew she was not going to be there afterwards, she was in LA with her family.. A simple phone call would have sufficed. Plus I told her I love her, like I have many times before and she skated around the return by saying Im nutz, which she says all the time, but I can tell she does not love me.

oh dear lord.....

I'm starting to think maybe you have been pushing her away..... You know you love her after just 5 weeks? Her not saying it in return is as clear of a sign as you're going to get that she IS NOT ont he same level you are.

~Haz~

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 12:13 PM

OK i just text her this "Look Summer, there's no excused for you not calling me yesterday at some point after I had surgery. You didn't show me any compassion or respect. And then you call me crazy for me telling you I love you. To me I don't think you really like me anymore and that's fine,. Bit there's no sense of continuing this.

It is finished

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 12:14 PM

Originally Posted by Standby

dude she is right you are nuts. telling her you love her after 5 weeks? wtf is this grade school? lets be serious here

Originally Posted by Hazard

oh dear lord.....

I'm starting to think maybe you have been pushing her away..... You know you love her after just 5 weeks? Her not saying it in return is as clear of a sign as you're going to get that she IS NOT ont he same level you are.

~Haz~

She told me shes loved me when i told her.

**jasc** · 01-25-2012, 12:14 PM

better get that iphone back! lol

**Standby** · 01-25-2012, 12:15 PM

wow this is like forum reality show

**HitIt** · 01-25-2012, 12:15 PM

Originally Posted by jasc

Backroom Casting Couch?

hahahahahaha.....hahahahah....i love those

**Standby** · 01-25-2012, 12:15 PM

Originally Posted by jasc

better get that iphone back! lol

fvckin right. should have waited till she came over and snatched that phone back first lol

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 12:23 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

She told me shes loved me when i told her.

This is her skating around it again..... a proper response from someone that loves you would be "but I do love you....."

~Haz~

**Vettester** · 01-25-2012, 12:36 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

She told me shes loved me when i told her.

Words are just that, words! Her actions told you all you need to know. Don't rationalize this anymore. Take her off of this pedestal that you see her on and move forward.

I had a similar deal way back in high school (all those years ago), where I ended up in the hospital. I dropped an absurd amount of weight in a very short time, and the docs were even speculating leukemia at one point, because nothing else was showing up on the tests. My GF at the time never made any effort to see how I was. It turned out that I had some crazy strain of mono. Also turned out that I got it from her, as she picked it up from some dude while we were dating. It was a no brainer for me at 18, and it would be more than a no brainer in my 40's.

**gixxerboy1** · 01-25-2012, 12:41 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

How do I break up with her, unless she comes to see me I cant do it in person. And I really dont want to do it over texting

i dont think you need to announce it. Dont call or text her anymore. She will get the hint

**HitIt** · 01-25-2012, 12:57 PM

Originally Posted by gixxerboy1

i dont think you need to announce it. Dont call or text her anymore. She will get the hint

yep. and when she calls you after being ignored wondering why the f you haven't called her, don't answer. and when she comes by, don't answer. and so on.

**SlimmerMe** · 01-25-2012, 01:14 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

Thanks..well she pissed me off 2 weeks ago. She had to put her dog down. I did not have my truck at the time cause my brother was using it. I offered to take the train up earlier and get out of work to go to the vet with her. She said it was ok and just wanted it to be her and her family. Later on I told her I might not be able to make it cause the last train left and my brother was not back yet with my truck. 5 minutes later he showed up and drove me up there cause we only had 1 car. A week later she tells me she was upset that i say "I might not be able to make it" EVEN though I made it..

This is what you are dealing with. First impressions stick. And by telling her that you "might not be able to make it" stayed with her and she just did not get over it thus took it out on you later.

When someone is down and out and someone they are in love with tells them they might not be able to make it? That is what stayed in her psyche. Not that you actually did make it. But that you came real real close to not making it. We gals know that when you are in love with us you will do anything to figure out how to do something. So this is where the trouble started and she hung onto that and the rest is history.

She felt like you were not there for her in those 5 minutes. So anytime someone feels this, especially a female and that is who we are talking about is it not? Then she felt so let down and that was a long 5 minutes to her while putting her dog down. She probably felt a deep desertion from you and just could not get over it.

This is what you need to ask her. Did that scenario taint her lack of response to you when you needed her? And if so, then it is up to you both to either work it out or move on. It is not a good beginning since neither one of you really trust each other now.

Good luck.

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 01:18 PM

Originally Posted by Razr.

She told me shes loved me when i told her.

Originally Posted by Hazard

This is her skating around it again..... a proper response from someone that loves you would be "but I do love you....."

~Haz~

I misread what you wrote.....

~Haz~

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 01:30 PM

Originally Posted by SlimmerMe

This is what you are dealing with. First impressions stick. And by telling her that you "might not be able to make it" stayed with her and she just did not get over it thus took it out on you later.

When someone is down and out and someone they are in love with tells them they might not be able to make it? That is what stayed in her psyche. Not that you actually did make it. But that you came real real close to not making it. We gals know that when you are in love with us you will do anything to figure out how to do something. So this is where the trouble started and she hung onto that and the rest is history. The trouble started when he said "I love you"

She felt like you were not there for her in those 5 minutes. So anytime someone feels this, especially a female and that is who we are talking about is it not? Then she felt so let down and that was a long 5 minutes to her while putting her dog down. She probably felt a deep desertion from you and just could not get over it.

Well i'm sorry but thats fvckin nuts..... Not only do I NOT understand that if thats truely the way women think..... but I have no desire to understand it. I like to think logically..... This is just outrageous and to deal with that shit is just downright god awful. There are plenty of women out there that wouldn't have held what he said over his head. If anything.... he DID do whatever he could in order to be there for her. HE MADE IT THERE......

IMO if this isn't good enough for her then she needs a reality check. She can wit the next 25 years looking for prince charming for all I'd care. She'll see the light one day..... when the guy she's with doesn't do shit for her. She'll think of you everytime she uses that Iphone..... then again..... probably not.
This is what you need to ask her. Did that scenario taint her lack of response to you when you needed her? And if so, then it is up to you both to either work it out or move on. It is not a good beginning since neither one of you really trust each other now.

Good luck.

^^^^ In bold.....

~Haz~

**evander87** · 01-25-2012, 01:30 PM

Razr first off I'm sorry you're going through this sh!t. Second I'd like to thank you for reminding me that I'd much rather be alone then with the wrong person.

**gixxerboy1** · 01-25-2012, 01:35 PM

Originally Posted by Hazard

^^^^ In bold.....

~Haz~

i agree. If that is that immature to hold that over him. Then she isnt worth being with. That is childish.

**Hazard** · 01-25-2012, 01:41 PM

If she can get this crazy over you saying that you MIGHT not make it..... just imagine what would happen if you got stuck at work for an important event..... or maybe you got stuck in a 15 car pile up while she was in labor..... haha she'd cut your fvckin head off man.....

~Haz~

**SlimmerMe** · 01-25-2012, 01:44 PM

Just simply trying to give another side to the story fellas.

There are always 3 sides.

**Shol'va** · 01-25-2012, 01:47 PM

Go to a neighborhood gay bar during beer bust. You'll forget all about her...

**SlimmerMe** · 01-25-2012, 01:47 PM

It is all communication.

Perhaps if Razr said, " Oh no baby. I am going to do everything possible to get there. I am. So let me get off the phone so I can figure this out." and then none of this would have happened now would it?

And if then he could not make it? For a real honest reason and then she got upset? Then that is when she is not taking into account life happens.

**SexySweetheart** · 01-25-2012, 01:57 PM

Originally Posted by SlimmerMe

It is all communication.

Perhaps if Razr said, " Oh no baby. I am going to do everything possible to get there. I am. So let me get off the phone so I can figure this out." and then none of this would have happened now would it?

And if then he could not make it? For a real honest reason and then she got upset? Then that is when she is not taking into account life happens.

^ yup

**Flier** · 01-25-2012, 02:01 PM

Wow..3 pages. Why?

You should have dumped her in page 1!
High maintenance!
("A week later she tells me she was upset that i say "I might not be able to make it" EVEN though I made it..")...run Forest, RUN!

**Shol'va** · 01-25-2012, 02:17 PM

Put this song on your phone ringer. She will get the hint...

**jasc** · 01-25-2012, 02:24 PM

Sorry sholva but this HAS to be his new ringback tone

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=-BM2cjd-NNE

give the song a minute to get goin.. chorus is spot on

**fukngruvn** · 01-25-2012, 02:50 PM

^^ for those of you not on phones...

**slfmade** · 01-25-2012, 02:59 PM

Originally Posted by SlimmerMe

It is all communication.

Perhaps if Razr said, " Oh no baby. I am going to do everything possible to get there. I am. So let me get off the phone so I can figure this out." and then none of this would have happened now would it?

And if then he could not make it? For a real honest reason and then she got upset? Then that is when she is not taking into account life happens.

This is so petty it's ridiculous! So because he said "I'm not sure I can make it but I'll try" instead of "I'll do everything possible to get there" she flipps out???? Again...this just goes to show that women have a sense of entitlement that says they should get there way 100% off the time because they deserve a "perfect" man and get all bent out of shape if EVERY LITTLE THING doesn't go their way.

Women say all the time that this behavior is engrained in them...that it's chemical responses in their brain...blah blah blah. But if a man ever tried the excuse of "I wanta fvck every woman I see because sense the dawn of time my chemical responses in my brain have told me to go out and fvck everything that moves...." Well you could imagine how that will turn out.

Women want us to accept their behavior as "this is the way that women are...deal with it"; however women would never accept that behavior from a man. Women say put up with my shit, but I'll be damn if I'm gonna put up with yours.

**spywizard** · 01-25-2012, 04:25 PM

"Too much too little too late to ever try again"

congrats brosky time to spread your wings and fly...

**JohnnyVegas** · 01-25-2012, 04:47 PM

Here is what I have learned after a failed marriage, a lot of dating and reading a few books: stop spending energy focusing on who is wrong or right in a situation.

Don't accuse anyone of being wrong, and certainly don't fight over it. The problem is NOT "right" or "wrong" or excuses for why things do, or don't get done. The ONLY important issue is COMPATIBILITY. If you want a girl that will pick you up at the hospital and worry about you after surgery, then don't have a fight with a girl that doesn't do it. Your disappointment and resulting fight does not fix the fact that she doesn't do the kinds of things you value. Don't judge someone on one action, but look for a trend.

Do you know a couple that fights over the house getting messy? The one that is a neat-freak always considers themselves the "good" one and the guy that throws his clothes on the floor when he goes to bed is the "bad" one. Bullshit! Neither one of them is right or wrong...they are just incompatible.

If you are looking for a long term relationship, date women until you find someone that you stay up all night talking to. Or someone that is interested in the same things you are. For the love of Pete, you should at least like the same TV shows, because that is what you are going to spend 15 hours a week doing. You probably won't find someone that is a perfect match, so you will need to find someone that is a good match and also has some flexibility. Someone that will let you throw your clothes on the floor in exchange for you letting her work too many hours (or whatever issue you have). And I mean true flexibility, like it never comes up again. Ever.

**Bryan2** · 01-25-2012, 05:31 PM

Originally Posted by JohnnyVegas

Here is what I have learned after a failed marriage, a lot of dating and reading a few books: stop spending energy focusing on who is wrong or right in a situation.

Don't accuse anyone of being wrong, and certainly don't fight over it. The problem is NOT "right" or "wrong" or excuses for why things do, or don't get done. The ONLY important issue is COMPATIBILITY. If you want a girl that will pick you up at the hospital and worry about you after surgery, then don't have a fight with a girl that doesn't do it. Your disappointment and resulting fight does not fix the fact that she doesn't do the kinds of things you value. Don't judge someone on one action, but look for a trend.

Do you know a couple that fights over the house getting messy? The one that is a neat-freak always considers themselves the "good" one and the guy that throws his clothes on the floor when he goes to bed is the "bad" one. Bullshit! Neither one of them is right or wrong...they are just incompatible.

If you are looking for a long term relationship, date women until you find someone that you stay up all night talking to. Or someone that is interested in the same things you are. For the love of Pete, you should at least like the same TV shows, because that is what you are going to spend 15 hours a week doing. You probably won't find someone that is a perfect match, so you will need to find someone that is a good match and also has some flexibility. Someone that will let you throw your clothes on the floor in exchange for you letting her work too many hours (or whatever issue you have). And I mean true flexibility, like it never comes up again. Ever.

Wise man

And from what I've noticed ever time Spywizard replies to a relationship thread he is spot on! lol

**Razor** · 01-25-2012, 06:09 PM

Originally Posted by JohnnyVegas

Here is what I have learned after a failed marriage, a lot of dating and reading a few books: stop spending energy focusing on who is wrong or right in a situation.

Don't accuse anyone of being wrong, and certainly don't fight over it. The problem is NOT "right" or "wrong" or excuses for why things do, or don't get done. The ONLY important issue is COMPATIBILITY. If you want a girl that will pick you up at the hospital and worry about you after surgery, then don't have a fight with a girl that doesn't do it. Your disappointment and resulting fight does not fix the fact that she doesn't do the kinds of things you value. Don't judge someone on one action, but look for a trend.

Do you know a couple that fights over the house getting messy? The one that is a neat-freak always considers themselves the "good" one and the guy that throws his clothes on the floor when he goes to bed is the "bad" one. Bullshit! Neither one of them is right or wrong...they are just incompatible.

If you are looking for a long term relationship, date women until you find someone that you stay up all night talking to. Or someone that is interested in the same things you are. For the love of Pete, you should at least like the same TV shows, because that is what you are going to spend 15 hours a week doing. You probably won't find someone that is a perfect match, so you will need to find someone that is a good match and also has some flexibility. Someone that will let you throw your clothes on the floor in exchange for you letting her work too many hours (or whatever issue you have). And I mean true flexibility, like it never comes up again. Ever.

Thanks man. She is coming over to talk about things. Well see what happens. The first time she called me was 30 minutes ago and I had to tell her to call me.
She says she wants to bring dinner and come hang out. But then she says we rushed into things. You guys were right I should not have told her that I loved her. Mistake #1. Mistake #2 the dog situation, even though I made it. Mistake #3 Letting her try to explain why she could not call and never even saying sorry.
I will learn from my mistakes. Keep you posted.