JOKE OF THE DAY (um....it's only Wed...shit i want this week to end)

Not sure if I've posted this first one before...So if I have, there will be a pic following the joke, as I'm bored at work :)


While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over) I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry?"

I replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher."

The cop said "What? ... a rectum stretcher?, and what does a rectum stretcher do?"

I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..."

The ticket - - $95.00

The look on his face - - PRICELESS





OK The funny picture...

For me, this is the number one reason to tell people who purchase animals and own expensive technological equipment to get the insurance that comes with purchase of said equipment...

and i mean how can you be mad at the dog...he's so damn cute!!!

i wish i could say that to a cop, what a laugh that'd be.

nice doggy tho.

Lol.. peeing on the laptop!!

I can see the warrenty return paperwork already...

Whether you've posted that or not, it's the first I've heard it...and I like it. By the way, this "it's only Wednesday" stuff better be with regards to "work" work, not your work as lounge lizard...if the constituency senses you loathe your job, they may, on a whim, relieve you of said title. Sincerely, the AR political consultant.