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  1. #1
    cherrydrpepper's Avatar
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    Being a little Happier and less Cynical

    Do you guys have some tips to enlighten the mind and bring us all mentally to a better place? For me.. body image is tied to my happiness. Its a double edged sword. Its hard for me to be happy when I am out of shape, and much easier when I am in shape. I like being this way because my whole chemistry revolves around a need to lift and be fit but I also see how this could be a negative. Another thing I will do is write down my short and long term goals and work towards them. I try to release that feeling of satisfaction when I accomplish something. For me that is one of the best feelings I can feel.

    This has been on my mind because I let my bodyfat get above 20% and just noticed myself feeling not so good about the world or people or myself in general. I have tweaked my diet and been doing a lot of cardio that I never used to do. I did 3 hours on the bicycle yesterday and will probably do 2 of walking today. My body responds better to more food and more cardio with weights versus less food and little cardio with weights for the look I am trying to achieve.

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    For me it's guaged by my marriage. When the world is good in that department then I feel a complete sense of well being...if it's off, so am I!

  3. #3
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    money.

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    Quote Originally Posted by austinite View Post
    money.
    Money makes me feel secure and security brings a lot of happiness. I agree with Lunk as well - things need to be going well at home for me to be happy. Body image should be less important, but I have always had body image issues so I would put it in the top five.

    Being happy with what I do for a living also ranks high.

    I also like driving fast.

  5. #5
    Times Roman's Avatar
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    go to afghanistan for a year and see how fvcked those folks have it. then come back home and not taken anything for granted. taking things for granted helps prevent you from being happy

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    All I have to do is look in the eyes of my three lil boys and see their unconditional love and all my problems go away. My wife has the same effect on me.

    Money makes me less stressed, but the stress stems from the fear of not providing for my family.

    My desire to look good and be fit is a sense of pride, which in turn should make you happy

    I've been very unhappy in my life, I think it's a balancing act. Not one thing can make you 100% happy. It's a conglomeration of things.

  7. #7
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    Slightly out in left field but 30 minutes of meditation daily can really help to better ones mind and mood in my opinion.

    For me, happiness is simply a way of thinking. I force myself to have a more positive outlook on life. I come out of my shell and strike up conversation with others, including, strangers, more often. I always tell myself it can be worse and I have been in much harder times

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tron3219 View Post
    All I have to do is look in the eyes of my three lil boys and see their unconditional love and all my problems go away. My wife has the same effect on me.
    I am always happy to read things like that.

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    Another thing that helped me was being aware that you may not be in control of everything that goes on, but the one thing you can control is your reaction. But that is way easier said then done lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tron3219 View Post
    Another thing that helped me was being aware that you may not be in control of everything that goes on, but the one thing you can control is your reaction. But that is way easier said then done lol
    That was a huge step forward in my maturity level and I am disappointed I didn't learn it until my 30s.

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    I like bears WOOF.
    Realist: A person who sees things as they truly are. A practical person. The pessimist complains about the wind; The optimist expects it to change; The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward

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    Quote Originally Posted by JohnnyVegas

    That was a huge step forward in my maturity level and I am disappointed I didn't learn it until my 30s.
    Hey, at least you learned it, I know guys well into their 40's that still haven't. Thinking they're owed happiness. Happiness is a goal, not a right.

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    goodlifting is offline Associate Member
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    Let go of any nasty grudges you might be holding against certain people in your life. I think anger is really heavy baggage to be carrying around. It stinks like shit too. I recently started mentally letting go of grudges I was holding against people from my past and I'm much more at peace with myself. The relationships with my loved ones improved. I think these relationships are the most important thing you will ever have in life.

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    Quote Originally Posted by goodlifting
    Let go of any nasty grudges you might be holding against certain people in your life. I think anger is really heavy baggage to be carrying around. It stinks like shit too. I recently started mentally letting go of grudges I was holding against people from my past and I'm much more at peace with myself. The relationships with my loved ones improved. I think these relationships are the most important thing you will ever have in life.
    Good advice, this is big problem of mine

  15. #15
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    This is actually an amazing thread, guys. Lets keep it going! (and I will seriously do my best to have anyone banned/demoted who derails it)

  16. #16
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    For me it's not trying to be happy. It's not being un happy. Dont let the little things bother you. Dont get upset. Getting rid of the negative stuff will make you more happy but if you try to be more happy you may be disappointed a lot and do just the opposite.

    Quote Originally Posted by goodlifting View Post
    Let go of any nasty grudges you might be holding against certain people in your life. I think anger is really heavy baggage to be carrying around. It stinks like shit too. I recently started mentally letting go of grudges I was holding against people from my past and I'm much more at peace with myself. The relationships with my loved ones improved. I think these relationships are the most important thing you will ever have in life.
    Yup, same idea.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    go to afghanistan for a year and see how fvcked those folks have it. then come back home and not taken anything for granted. taking things for granted helps prevent you from being happy
    QFT

    it doesn't have to be as far as afghanistan though as you can find abject poverty right around the corner. i live in an area full of million dollar villas but these villas are built by burmese workers who are here illegally and live in wood and tin shacks adjacent to the villas. these people have kids and the kids run around the construction sites bare foot, never see a doctor or a classroom and find things like an extra plastic bag to be a pretty cool toy for the day. their parents aren't even making ten bucks a day, working twelve hour days seven days a week and know that they can get thrown out of the country at any moment because they are here illegally.

    why are they doing it then? because it's a hell of a lot better opportunity then they've got in burma. i'm not sure if that helps with being cynical but it should put our own happiness in perspective.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    For me it's not trying to be happy. It's not being un happy. Dont let the little things bother you. Dont get upset. Getting rid of the negative stuff will make you more happy but if you try to be more happy you may be disappointed a lot and do just the opposite.


    Yup, same idea.
    one of my Fb friends posted this today, it's made the rounds a thousand times before but has a home in threads like this i think...

    "One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson
    about a battle that goes on inside people.

    He said, "My son, the battle is between
    two "wolves" inside us all.

    One is Evil.
    It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed,
    arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies,
    false pride, superiority, and ego.

    The other is Good.
    It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

    The grandson thought about it for a minute
    and then asked his grandfather:
    "Which wolf wins?"

    The old Cherokee simply replied,
    "The one you feed."

  19. #19
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    Awesome thread. I've been fealing shitty lately and theres some good wisdom from you old timers on here.

  20. #20
    JD250's Avatar
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    Forgiveness, is a big one. Forgiving others, yourself, some folks even hold a grudge against their God. I've found that forgiving isn't about an apology, you will likely never get one besides it doesn't take much forgiveness if you've gotten a sincere apology. It's a very personal and even selfish thing and also extremely difficult to grasp but it will set you free in your mind and spirit when you break the bonds that held you prisoner for so long.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by cherrydrpepper
    Do you guys have some tips to enlighten the mind and bring us all mentally to a better place? For me.. body image is tied to my happiness. Its a double edged sword. Its hard for me to be happy when I am out of shape, and much easier when I am in shape. I like being this way because my whole chemistry revolves around a need to lift and be fit but I also see how this could be a negative. Another thing I will do is write down my short and long term goals and work towards them. I try to release that feeling of satisfaction when I accomplish something. For me that is one of the best feelings I can feel.

    This has been on my mind because I let my bodyfat get above 20% and just noticed myself feeling not so good about the world or people or myself in general. I have tweaked my diet and been doing a lot of cardio that I never used to do. I did 3 hours on the bicycle yesterday and will probably do 2 of walking today. My body responds better to more food and more cardio with weights versus less food and little cardio with weights for the look I am trying to achieve.
    Turn to God...

  22. #22
    JD250's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by times roman View Post
    go to afghanistan for a year and see how fvcked those folks have it. Then come back home and not taken anything for granted. Taking things for granted helps prevent you from being happy
    truth

  23. #23
    cherrydrpepper's Avatar
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    Walked the beach for 2 hours for cardio. Listened to a lot of motivational music and interviews on the ipod. Daydreamed about the future and who I want to become. Felt great afterwards.

  24. #24
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    I have noticed lately, even with my life being in a very stressful point, I am very happy. I am overworked with classes and work with little to no free time during the week. Yet I am still happy.

    In the past few months I have noticed I have let all of my grudges go. I feel no hatred towards anyone. I recently reestablished a friendship with an ex. I never plan on dating her again nor do I really even feel the same way about her anymore, but she was a great friend for many years even before we dated, so it was nice to rekindle the friendship and alleviate any tension between us.

    I have found myself looking at the positives in life. The stress has made me realize I can't control everything in life. You just have to go with the flow and make the best out of it. I find myself smiling more for no reason. I feel my happiness radiates to those around me. I have noticed not only myself, but others striking up conversations. I have had many more people than usual who will simply talk with me. I attribute it to the welcoming look I feel I am giving off due to my happiness. I am usually just a big intimidating guy but now I feel like most people are not intimidated by me and are seeing me for my personality rather than size.

    My connections with family are much better. I talk to my little sister more than ever. We have never had a very talkative relationship and contact was usually only made when we were both visiting the parents at the same time. Now we text and call weekly. I talk on the phone daily with at lest one of my parents.

    All of this comes back to me though. I feel I have consciously made an effort to be more happy. My increased interaction has caused others to do the same. I am not the only one initiating it now. But looking down in yourself and knowing no matter how tough things are that you can still be happy is really what it takes. It all comes back to you. You can be as happy as you want to be.

  25. #25
    kmms's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cherrydrpepper View Post
    Walked the beach for 2 hours for cardio. Listened to a lot of motivational music and interviews on the ipod. Daydreamed about the future and who I want to become. Felt great afterwards.
    "everyone should meditate for 20 mins each day. if you're too busy, meditate for 1 hour"

  26. #26
    Honkey_Kong's Avatar
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    You guys really want to know what happiness is? Two chicks at the same time.



    Seriously, it's those little things in life that we enjoy. It comes in small doses.

  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Honkey_Kong View Post
    You guys really want to know what happiness is? Two chicks at the same time.



    Seriously, it's those little things in life that we enjoy. It comes in small doses.
    Maybe the two i had a month ago with fake tits on both has me so happy.

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noles12 View Post
    Maybe the two i had a month ago with fake tits on both has me so happy.
    See what I mean?

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Noles12 View Post
    I have noticed lately, even with my life being in a very stressful point, I am very happy. I am overworked with classes and work with little to no free time during the week. Yet I am still happy.

    In the past few months I have noticed I have let all of my grudges go. I feel no hatred towards anyone. I recently reestablished a friendship with an ex. I never plan on dating her again nor do I really even feel the same way about her anymore, but she was a great friend for many years even before we dated, so it was nice to rekindle the friendship and alleviate any tension between us.

    I have found myself looking at the positives in life. The stress has made me realize I can't control everything in life. You just have to go with the flow and make the best out of it. I find myself smiling more for no reason. I feel my happiness radiates to those around me. I have noticed not only myself, but others striking up conversations. I have had many more people than usual who will simply talk with me. I attribute it to the welcoming look I feel I am giving off due to my happiness. I am usually just a big intimidating guy but now I feel like most people are not intimidated by me and are seeing me for my personality rather than size.

    My connections with family are much better. I talk to my little sister more than ever. We have never had a very talkative relationship and contact was usually only made when we were both visiting the parents at the same time. Now we text and call weekly. I talk on the phone daily with at lest one of my parents.

    All of this comes back to me though. I feel I have consciously made an effort to be more happy. My increased interaction has caused others to do the same. I am not the only one initiating it now. But looking down in yourself and knowing no matter how tough things are that you can still be happy is really what it takes. It all comes back to you. You can be as happy as you want to be.


    This is the key to happiness. You have to CHOOSE to be happy. You send out a vibration of happiness and the universe sends it back to you.

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Honkey_Kong View Post
    You guys really want to know what happiness is? Two chicks at the same time.



    Seriously, it's those little things in life that we enjoy. It comes in small doses.
    Works for me.
    Small doses such as 5' 2" 95 lbs.
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Being a little Happier and less Cynical-100_2951-16-2.jpg  

  31. #31
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    555 awesome. i didn't realize we could post nsfw pics here.

  32. #32
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    My tips would be - don't let negativity breed and surround yourself with positive people and do positive things what make you happy. The most important thing in life is your health because if you haven't go that then everything else seems so minuscule. Go and do some volunteer work in a hospice for the day that would put a different stance on things in your life and your worries. Always live in the NOW and not in the past or future and do the best you can for yourself and others and happiness will follow. There are also some very powerful books out there what can change the way you look at things.

  33. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Works for me.
    Small doses such as 5' 2" 95 lbs.
    You really need to update that home phone. Who has a phone with the curly cord anymore?
    Realist: A person who sees things as they truly are. A practical person. The pessimist complains about the wind; The optimist expects it to change; The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward

  34. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life View Post
    You really need to update that home phone. Who has a phone with the curly cord anymore?
    Actually I do because when the power goes out all my other cordless phones dont work but the old fashioned curly cord wired handset keeps working. Think about it. Dont give up on old technology 100%

  35. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Actually I do because when the power goes out all my other cordless phones dont work but the old fashioned curly cord wired handset keeps working. Think about it. Dont give up on old technology 100%
    When the power goes out my iPhone still works.
    Realist: A person who sees things as they truly are. A practical person. The pessimist complains about the wind; The optimist expects it to change; The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward

  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts
    Works for me.
    Small doses such as 5' 2" 95 lbs.
    Looks like a double dose lol

  37. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life View Post
    When the power goes out my iPhone still works.
    He's talking about post nuclear apocalypse when the Ayatolla of Rocknrolla Lord Humungus will rule the wasteland

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by cherrydrpepper View Post
    He's talking about post nuclear apocalypse when the Ayatolla of Rocknrolla Lord Humungus will rule the wasteland
    There's an app for that.
    Realist: A person who sees things as they truly are. A practical person. The pessimist complains about the wind; The optimist expects it to change; The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward

  39. #39
    JP-MAN is offline Banned
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    alot of great advice in here.

    always be honest with yourself. if u stay true to yourself, u will never have a problem with the person in the mirror....

  40. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life View Post
    When the power goes out my iPhone still works.
    Only as long as the battery last. No app for that.

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