Please help me make a decision on leaving wife or not **long, pls, read**

[jdog55]

Please let me explain the conudrum that i am in. This is my second marriage. About a week after my first marriage, I started dating my current wife of almost one year now. I worked with her then and we now still work at the same company, but I now work in another department. I fell in love with her because she was always always positive and tried to be funny. She is hispanic, which I prefer and very good looking with big boobs. She likes to dance and I don't but we compromised at no dancing at all.

She cleans my clothes and cleans the house. She let's me play computer games when I want to play for hours and doesn't complain. I would be playing a game for 10 hours if I wanted and she would not complain. She likes to watch housewives and other shows and be left alone and prefers that I not talk duing the show because she has to pause it. She owns her own home and her car is paid off. She doesnt like to shop and spend money. Regardless of what I make, she lets me live with her ( Yes, I know we are married.) for only $400.00 a month. Thats it...she pays all bills in the house and I give her 400 a month only. I keep my seperate bank account. If anyone is wondering how that happened....When we were dating, I didnt want to move in and she really really wanted me to move in, so I said if I move in the only think I will pay forever is $400.00 a month.
By the way, I buy paper towels and toilet paper, shampoo and soap..ect.



Now all women reading this may think i'm some massive jerk....quite the opposite.

1. I am her b.i.t.c.h. haha. Ya, so, if she wants me to go get something, I do. Jdog, can you go get my a paper towel. Jdog, can you go get me some ice tea. Jdog, can you turn off the lights. Jdog, can you turn on the fan. I never ask her to get me anything. I feel there is a lot of value in this for a relationship... Personal fetcher...

2. I cook dinner for her and her 14 yo son every night or I go buy something to eat for all of us with my money.

3. I take her son to school every morning.

4. I do the dishes most of the time.

5. I take out the trash.



So maybe someone is wondering...whats the problem...u do a few things for your wife, have seperate bank accounts and only give her $400.00 a month.

The problem is....SEX LIFE. She wanted to get married really bad and I wanted to stay bf/gf another 10 or so years. I really feel like I am missing out on something good and it hurts my core.

You see, when we were dating she would give me oral sex every few days. About a month into our dating she swallowed while doing oral. Then it stopped. I let her know that I like what she did, but she never did it again...even after marriage. I used to kinda get mad when she was giving me oral when im lying down because when im about to cum, she moves her head towards it like she thinks she is supposed to let me finish in her mouth, but then looked at me and I kinda hear in here eyes "it's him, I don't have to let him finish in my mouth. When I brought it up a few weeks ago in kinda an angry way...she said she is "mature" now and no longer wants to do that. A little prodding over the last few months, I find out that she swallowed for 2 previous guys in the past (that she admits to...)

So here I am looking at the rest of my life. This life is certain to contain oral sex between 2 - 4 times a year. No fingering her.... No anal or anal play....no doing it with the lights on...never has a "fire" or "desire" to give me oral...only compains about her sinusus or that it hurts her mouth....I will never be able to finish in a females mouth again.

I was not a virgin before meeting her, i've bad plenty of girls spit/swallow....It's my ultimate sexual experience....and to never be able to do that again??? help me!! I feel like i got jipped.

By the way, I totally understand if my wife had no swallowed before because she hated cum in her mouth, but she swallowed for two other guys before and once for me, so it's not like it was impossible...she is just "mature" now all of the damn sudden. She is 40 and I am 34.

She thinks I love her so much and would never expect me to ever leave her. I've let her know that I am sexually unsatisfied, but I have never mentioned leaving.

I feel sooooo bad, but the prospect of such a horrible sex life for the rest of my life hurts also.

[paulzane]

Yes leave her..... She deserves someone better!!!

[Honkey_Kong]

Well, why don't you just bang her and nut inside her like a decent person?

Seriously, if you're not happy, there is no reason to stay with her. It's not even a big decision to be making. You just get your stuff and you move out. Life's too short to not be happy. And you said it yourself she's not willing to compromise with you on this.

[panntastic]

Wow

You seem quite immature how old are you fella?

[Honkey_Kong]

Yes leave her..... She deserves someone better!!!

Yeah, what more could this fvcker want? Seriously, so what if she doesn't swallow? You can't kiss a woman who just swallowed your pride 30 seconds ago.

[LGM]

So you're talking about divorce because your wife won't swallow?

[jdog55]

Im not a great proof reader and just saw that part of my explanation didnt make sense.
So, when she used to ride me and get off me before I pull out, she would move her head towards my penis like she was going to let me cum in her mouth, but then she moved away....I find out later that her ex that she swallowed for "made her swallow". wtf...so hen she was riding her ex and they finished she would let her ex cum in her mouth sometimes.....but not me...

I'd make you to if I knew what to do to "make you" without being violent.

[jdog55]

How am I immature...did you real the whole thing?

[LGM]

This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

[jdog55]

Ok, i'm immature...lets switch the roles and see who is immature...


30 yo old wife is married to 30 yo husband....the husband no longer wants to have sex with wife...toys...masterbation nothing....not even complmenting the wife or making her feel good...... Bad husband hypocrite

[Capebuffalo]

Just out of curiosity what made your first marriage go south?

[jdog55]

If im going to go through life never being sexually desired again then kill me now pls.

[LGM]

Ok, i'm immature...lets switch the roles and see who is immature...


30 yo old wife is married to 30 yo husband....the husband no longer wants to have sex with wife...toys...masterbation nothing....not even complmenting the wife or making her feel good...... Bad husband hypocrite

Okay, so it's not just the bj; she doesn't want ANY sex at all, at ANY time? Correct?

[jdog55]

Ok, my first wife...i cant go into it because it's too long, but she got fat and her kids were horrible.

[panntastic]

How am I immature...did you real the whole thing?

Read the responses from everyone else you can see them rallying to support you.
Fella this is some dumb ass shit!
You need to learn to appreciate women more especially you wife!
This is your second marriage and your willing to throw it away for what?
Because she won't swallow?
Grow the **** up and learn some respect!

[jdog55]

LGM ....she does give me sex 1x a week, but she just stays on her side while I spoon her...maybe some missionary sometimes....by the way she is complaining the whole time and asking me to finish. BJ is about every 90 days if i comlain

[panntastic]

Ok, my first wife...i cant go into it because it's too long, but she got fat and her kids were horrible.

And your not immature!!!!!!!
Wow
Your a joke

[jdog55]

There is plenty of guys ....on here...that would not even seriously date a girl if she didnt give bj....u know it. I'll stay with her for now....sounds like im being too much of a jerk.......but I tell you when....no bj or good sex for the rest of my life of not an option

[austinite]

Just because she doesn't say anything to you about your video games doesn't mean she is OK with it. Playing video games for 10 hours is a sure-fire way to turn anyone off. Male or female. So maybe less time with the games and more time on a retirement plan.

[Honkey_Kong]

Maybe you should try to figure out what turns your wife on? You're obviously doing something wrong.

[LGM]

What Austinite said.

You need to have a serious sit down and tell her how you feel, why you feel that way, and then let her respond. If she won't talk about it or discuss it, then I'd tell her the only other option you see right now is to leave; if she still won't respond or discuss things, then she's already emotionally checked out.

But if you really love her and are serious about this relationship, then you better start working on it together, instead of what seems to be a roommate w/sex agreement.

[JAB1]

Just because she doesn't say anything to you about your video games doesn't mean she is OK with it. Playing video games for 10 hours is a sure-fire way to turn anyone off. Male or female. So maybe less time with the games and more time on a retirement plan.

Ageed^^ She is prob posting on some female support site right now asking if she should leave her lazy video game junkie mooch of a husband. He sucks in bed, and wants her to suck his filthy c*^k after he sits around in old undies farting on the couch playing games online with 12 year olds!! lol. I think what you are missing is some self respect, go out work hard, put in your fair share to the relationship, appreciate her, and you might be amazed at how quickly she may find you an attractive mate, rather than a resented burden......SItting around pathetically whinning and begging for sexual desires to be fulfilled only works if your paying by the hour, otherwise most chicks I know would cal that a turn off to say the least....Food for thought.

[Capebuffalo]

Ok, my first wife...i cant go into it because it's too long, but she got fat and her kids were horrible.

Man grow the fvck up. She will be better off if you leave. Please leave.

[--->>405<<---]

how the heck and why are u talking to ur wife about "riding and swallowing" other guys?????????????????

ur situation is pretty pathetic if u ask me. sounds like u need to grow up and start acting like a man dude.. seriously. this is really pathetic.

[BG]

LGM ....she does give me sex 1x a week, but she just stays on her side while I spoon her...maybe some missionary sometimes....by the way she is complaining the whole time and asking me to finish. BJ is about every 90 days if i comlain

this does suck. I recommend a counselor, a mediator works great , both sides of the issue comes out and some how gets resolved. By going to a counselor or even asking her to go may makd her realize how much the sexual part of your relationship means to you.

[Times Roman]

Yes leave her..... She deserves someone better!!!

Damn Paul

You wisdom is incredible. I was thinking the same damn thing.

All I can say is, and I'm not sure why I'm even responding to this stupid thread, all I can say is this....

1) OP! WTF!! You still playing video games like some dumb kid in highschool? Man up and throw that kid shit away!! (DAMN DUDE!)
2) She sounds like a pretty incredible lady. But all you can see are sexual "deficiencies"?? You have the rest of your life with this lady. Be patient, and maybe go to a sex therapist. She seems like she may be going through some head trips.

Sometimes, you have to WORK (sorry about the 4 letter word) at a marraige to get it to work.

[jdog55]

I agree with most of the posts, it just sucks.

I feel that I deserve to be desired because im attractive and fit.

I feel that I deserve for her to swallow because she has done it before.

Maybe this will make the most sense if I have been unclear so far.... Ive had prior relationships where I was valued. They were happy they were with me. I knew they didnt like to do some stuff sexually, but they did it anyway because they wanted me to like them and they respected me. They couldnt wait to be sexual. We would date and have a great time and i'd feel on top of the world and my hard work at my job and gym were reaping dividends. I want to be married to someone that is sexual with me just like they like they were during the during the first few months. If i'm not desired, i'd rather be alone or go someplace else.

I'll try counseling as some of you have suggested...she doesn't like to have conversations about sex life....The counseling might suck....why would I go down on her if she doesnt go down on me and swallow. She also says she has never had an orgasm so she doesnt like when past guys have went down because it feels good, but doesn't do anything.

I may be a dick, but most guys would just cheat rather than leaving and i'd never cheat...i'd rather just leave. I feel I am a good person for avoiding cheating

[jdog55]

Video games are an additction....its sucks....I guess no one plays black ops or online mmo's, but it is fun

[BluPhin]

I've gleaned through a lot of stupidity on various forums over the years. But this thread ranks up there with the best. The only thing that makes it tolerable is the thought that you are not really serious and you are just trying to solicit a response. If that's the case, then my response is to grab her ears and finish in her mouth like you really want to.

[-Ender-]

I agree with most of the posts, it just sucks.

I feel that I deserve to be desired because im attractive and fit.

I feel that I deserve for her to swallow because she has done it before.

Maybe this will make the most sense if I have been unclear so far.... Ive had prior relationships where I was valued. They were happy they were with me. I knew they didnt like to do some stuff sexually, but they did it anyway because they wanted me to like them and they respected me. They couldnt wait to be sexual. We would date and have a great time and i'd feel on top of the world and my hard work at my job and gym were reaping dividends. I want to be married to someone that is sexual with me just like they like they were during the during the first few months. If i'm not desired, i'd rather be alone or go someplace else.

I'll try counseling as some of you have suggested...she doesn't like to have conversations about sex life....The counseling might suck....why would I go down on her if she doesnt go down on me and swallow. She also says she has never had an orgasm so she doesnt like when past guys have went down because it feels good, but doesn't do anything.

I may be a dick, but most guys would just cheat rather than leaving and i'd never cheat...i'd rather just leave. I feel I am a good person for avoiding cheating

Would you swallow the shit? Didn't think so. Get over it. There is alot more to life than where you blow your damn load.

[Lunk1]

Stop being her roomate and start being a husband! If you need the definition...let me know.

There is sooo much wrong with this I would have to break it down in sections

[RajaSultan]

Ok, my first wife...i cant go into it because it's too long, but she got fat and her kids were horrible.

do you do cycles :P? your test must be high that's why you are feeling sooper young at that age but well you should not always want sex but look for someone who loves you and she does i guess so just try to go low on the sex part and i doubt you are 34 lol ... you left the first wife because she turned fat .. she probably cried alot when you left her because she loves/loved you

[jdog55]

Why would you doubt im 34. I joined this site 2002....

I've gotten the opinions of my situation that I came here for, so thanks all.

If I do decide to leave eventually, that will suck to. I would have to start dating and act like I liked them and when I find out they dont like to swallow, im done. On to the next one because I know what I want with my 3rd wife. I'd probably be a little lonely between these dates so it's a hard decision.

[jj341]

I don't think she respects you sir. I think she's just putting up with you. Playing video games for 10 hours a day does not garner respect. The admission you make that you are her "bitch" is very telling. You are her gopher and at her beck and call. That's absurd. You are just making things a bit easier for her.
A woman needs a real man. You act like a wuss in the relationship and that's what she thinks of you. And that is why, to her, sex with you is a chore not a delight. Her goal is to placate not to please you.
Maybe you should leave her for awhile. Get your own place. Show some independence. Maybe she'll look at you differently then.

[paulzane]

Why would you doubt im 34. I joined this site 2002....

I've gotten the opinions of my situation that I came here for, so thanks all.

If I do decide to leave eventually, that will suck to. I would have to start dating and act like I liked them and when I find out they dont like to swallow, im done. On to the next one because I know what I want with my 3rd wife. I'd probably be a little lonely between these dates so it's a hard decision.

I think you will be lonely for a LONG time!

[Times Roman]

I think you will be lonely for a LONG time!

What do you think Paul?

Sounds like he needs a whore instead of a wife?

[Times Roman]

not to make "light" of your situation, Jdog, but here's something else i'm hearing from you....

my wife is great, she does this and she does that....

....I don't hear one gawdam thing YOU do, except contribute a paltry $400/mo to the household expenses! Oh, and you buy the toilet paper too, almost forgot that crritical part.

Sounds to me like you are a free loader?

[bikeral]

jdog here is what I suggest. Don't give any tells that you are about to cum. Catch her by surprise before she stops. bingo you came in her mouth when she didn't see it coming.
Next time promise it will not happen again .

[BluPhin]

Be a man and finish in her vag like most loving husbands do. If there is any justice at all in your sick world, you should have to finish in your fist for the rest of your life.

[Rwy]

Video games are an additction....its sucks....I guess no one plays black ops or online mmo's, but it is fun

I was ranked under a 100k in kills on MW2 on xbox. I was also 30% body fat. I havent played video games since April 14th of 2012. Putting them down was the best thing I ever did.

I didnt read your whole post just some of it. Are you watching a lot of porn? Some of the things you are talking about porn stars will do but not the common every day girl