Is it wrong to stay in a relationship that you doubt will go anywhere?

I'm asking for some opinions on people who know what I'm talking about. I love my girl and I truly care about her... but I know she's into me way more than I'm into her. I think this does cause some of the conflicts we have because she's dying for this relationship to keep progressing meanwhile I just want to chill and have fun and see where it goes.


Deep down though, I think it's pretty doubtful I would marry her. How do I honestly feel now? I really care about her, I like our time together, I want to stay with her. But in the back of my mind I know I definitely want to stay with her for the holidays because I prefer not to be alone for this time and I think in the spring I would possibly break up with her and look to find a new girl at that time when it's easier to meet girls.

This is what I THINK I am feeling, is it possible I decide I love her and want to marry her? Yeah that's a possibility, but this shit is in the back of my head. Is this wrong to feel this way? Has anyone else felt similar? It's not like anyone can tell me dude you don't care about her just leave her, cause I do. Or dude just break up with her now because you're definitely going to eventually, which isn't necessarily true either.

Man if you don't know what you really want there's no way in hell I can tell you.

All I can say is I've been in a similar place before, it was selfish of me and I should have ended it long before I did. You shouldn't lead her on. I know its not exactly cut and dry, hell even as I'm writing this I'm chatting with a girl who's really nothing more than a fling for me but to her its real and she probably thinks she can convince me to stay. I've been completely upfront with her about my intentions but women aren't always rational. Tell your lady how it is, maybe not the WHOLE truth but basically tell her how you feel. Take it from there

enjoy whatever you have, treasure it while it last.

If your not sure then stick with it and see where it goes.
Talk to her also so she is aware where your head/heart is at and then see how she reacts. It may tell you a lot.

Perfect setup for an ATM attempt.

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Originally Posted by dsm4life

perfect setup for an atm attempt.

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atm ?

ass to mouth?

you may be looking at a gift horse in the mouth my brother. Ask for a break and see if the heart grows fonder because its hard to find what you have bro!!! and one day you may/maynot long for this this relationship.
Why is no one ever satisfied and think their entitled to perfection when they want it no ,matter how many times they change their mind.

Stats? Hers, that is...

How long have y'all been together? Same thing happened to me buddy. I dated her for two years and she wanted to get married and I wanted to do anything but that. I never cared about her, I just let her stick around for some reason.... for two years haha. I definitely regret it cause it was not right for me to do that..the best way I can tell if I am on the fence for a girl, is if I always think about cheating on her, that's a good indication that it won't work out ever. But I am blessed to have the girl of my dreams now thankfully! Best of wishes to you buddy! I know its not a fun place to be at.

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Originally Posted by Angel of death

I'm asking for some opinions on people who know what I'm talking about. I love my girl and I truly care about her... but I know she's into me way more than I'm into her. I think this does cause some of the conflicts we have because she's dying for this relationship to keep progressing meanwhile I just want to chill and have fun and see where it goes.

Deep down though, I think it's pretty doubtful I would marry her. How do I honestly feel now? I really care about her, I like our time together, I want to stay with her. But in the back of my mind I know I definitely want to stay with her for the holidays because I prefer not to be alone for this time and I think in the spring I would possibly break up with her and look to find a new girl at that time when it's easier to meet girls.

This is what I THINK I am feeling, is it possible I decide I love her and want to marry her? Yeah that's a possibility, but this shit is in the back of my head. Is this wrong to feel this way? Has anyone else felt similar? It's not like anyone can tell me dude you don't care about her just leave her, cause I do. Or dude just break up with her now because you're definitely going to eventually, which isn't necessarily true either.

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I was in the same type of situation... and let me tell you it ended very ugly.2 years back I started dating this girl that liked me a lot more than I liked her but she was very pretty so I kept her around.

In that time I started to care for her a lot wich complicated things even more.Then 1day after 2 years she tells me that I'm just to distant for this relationship to go on because all this time she was the one that cared most and then she decided just to stop.After a lot of fighting and hurting each other she left me and it hurt me more than it hurt her.. now she hates me and we will probably never talk to me again. And that was about a month ago.

At the end it doesnt matter anymore but if I could have ended it back then...I would have.

But hay man do what you think is the right thing even if she doesnt understand.

Its only wrong if you are misleading the person into thinking it may be or already is more than they think. Tell them how you feel. Maybe the feel the same. Nothing wrong with a bit of fun and companionship. Its only wrong when deception comes into play and your getting what you want while the other is under false pretenses.

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Originally Posted by DSM4Life

Perfect setup for an ATM attempt.

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Sincere and considerate all at once.

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Originally Posted by Fcastle357

Its only wrong if you are misleading the person into thinking it may be or already is more than they think. Tell them how you feel. Maybe the feel the same. Nothing wrong with a bit of fun and companionship. Its only wrong when deception comes into play and your getting what you want while the other is under false pretenses.

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Nicely written.

You seem to care for her (you love and care for her), so ask yourself the real reason(s) why you don't want for the relationship to progress forward. Is it her personality, goals, or some physical traits you don't like? In any case, if you really care for her think about what you can do to make things work and communicate with her; honesty may help you sort things out.

Be aware though that if you push her away and then you realize she could have been the one, you will hate yourself when you see her with someone equal or better than you.

First things first.... does she have big titties?

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Originally Posted by JD250

First things first.... does she have big titties?

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Well said.


OP, you should post some pictures of her to give us a better idea of what you are dealing with.

Just tell her your thoughts, but don't use the word "f**kbuddy". Never had a high rate of success with that.



Seriously, tell her what you posted here. Just don't tell here that you did post it here. Good luck.

Thanks for the replies guys...honestly I don't think she'd be too happy if I told her what I just told you guys...but at the same time theres still that chance I would change my mind a few months down the road...isn't there?

(By the way her titties are massive and she has a beautiful ass. Her face is good. This has a lot to do with why I might want to hang on to her despite not being so into her...)

It's natural human tendencies to want something different. It's the animal side of us. At the same time, we yearn for companionship and don't want to be alone.

The grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence. For example, my neighbors to the right of me have a bunch of fvcking weeds in their lawn and they keep trying to grow through my fence.

^ lol. I have my own landscaping company and I deal with that on a daily basis. Some neighbors encourage there weeds I believe....

Unless you have something readily available, I would stick around. No sex is no fun.

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Originally Posted by Angel of death

I'm asking for some opinions on people who know what I'm talking about. I love my girl and I truly care about her... but I know she's into me way more than I'm into her. I think this does cause some of the conflicts we have because she's dying for this relationship to keep progressing meanwhile I just want to chill and have fun and see where it goes.

Deep down though, I think it's pretty doubtful I would marry her. How do I honestly feel now? I really care about her, I like our time together, I want to stay with her. But in the back of my mind I know I definitely want to stay with her for the holidays because I prefer not to be alone for this time and I think in the spring I would possibly break up with her and look to find a new girl at that time when it's easier to meet girls.

This is what I THINK I am feeling, is it possible I decide I love her and want to marry her? Yeah that's a possibility, but this shit is in the back of my head. Is this wrong to feel this way? Has anyone else felt similar? It's not like anyone can tell me dude you don't care about her just leave her, cause I do. Or dude just break up with her now because you're definitely going to eventually, which isn't necessarily true either.

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Since u seem to care for this gal, u will find the right words and have the talk. Sooner is better.

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Do you think maybe the fact that she likes you more scares you? Imagine if she pulled away from you, do you think you'd want her more? I've been in relationships where I've fallen harder than the guy has but eventually when I pull away they come back begging for me and all of sudden 'realize' that they love me.
WHATEVER!

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Originally Posted by Angel of death

I'm asking for some opinions on people who know what I'm talking about. I love my girl and I truly care about her... but I know she's into me way more than I'm into her. I think this does cause some of the conflicts we have because she's dying for this relationship to keep progressing meanwhile I just want to chill and have fun and see where it goes.


Deep down though, I think it's pretty doubtful I would marry her. How do I honestly feel now? I really care about her, I like our time together, I want to stay with her. But in the back of my mind I know I definitely want to stay with her for the holidays because I prefer not to be alone for this time and I think in the spring I would possibly break up with her and look to find a new girl at that time when it's easier to meet girls.

This is what I THINK I am feeling, is it possible I decide I love her and want to marry her? Yeah that's a possibility, but this shit is in the back of my head. Is this wrong to feel this way? Has anyone else felt similar? It's not like anyone can tell me dude you don't care about her just leave her, cause I do. Or dude just break up with her now because you're definitely going to eventually, which isn't necessarily true either.

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you are just afrais of commitment, unless someone already said that. if not sure write down everything you like about her on one side and other side what you dont like about her. if the list is bigger for the things you dont like about her is longer then the things you like about her just dump that bitch otherwise get ready for a life of not being singal

Man...... I need a new HR manager. Turnover is too high...

We have a member Redz here that would be able to give you some great advice on this matter lol