Parents paying child support

[Hazard]

Anyone out there paying?

I have custodial custody of my daughter. She's going on 3yrs old and to date my ex hasn't paid a dime. To be fair.... I havnt asked.

I'm now enrolling my daughter in daycare and the cost is crazy. It's about time she helps. Unfortunately as I use the child support calculater it doesn't say she owes me anything that will really help me lol. I'm at a loss. She would owe me around $300/mo - daycare is 3 times that. Wtf is wrong with this system?

[thisAngelBites]

That sucks. I don't have any advice but just want to commiserate about how crazy it is that people don't take responsibility for their children. I would think she would speak to you constantly and inquire about that sort of thing without you having to ask.

[hawk14dl]

It's based on percentages. What she makes/what you make determine the percentages of what she'd owe. It's screwed up.

My ex owes me around $10,000 in back child support. I contacted human services and they basically told me they wouldn't do anything about it unless I signed over full control of my case to them.

[RaginCajun]

$300 a month is more than $0

[hawk14dl]

I believe his point is, her "share" of daycare is only about $100 a month, where as daycare actually costs $150 a week.

It's a flawed system. We're punished for doing well essentially.

[jimmyinkedup]

The courts often and intentionally err on the the side of financial responsibility unfiarly falling on the responsible parent. They do so knowing this is the one that ill ensure the child and their needs will be taken care of no matter what, It s screwed up but in a weird way it makes sense. Would you put the lions share of a child well being on an irresponsible ****wad? of course not - neither woud they.

[Hazard]

It's based on percentages. What she makes/what you make determine the percentages of what she'd owe. It's screwed up.

My ex owes me around $10,000 in back child support. I contacted human services and they basically told me they wouldn't do anything about it unless I signed over full control of my case to them.

I get that but what I don't understand is why my coworker pays $500/month. His ex wife makes double what he makes.

I can't help but feel like the father gets fvcked in any situation.

I paid for all the diapers, food, clothes, toys, doctor visits, birthday parties..... Etc. she has given me 3 boxes of diapers in almost 3 years.

She owes me 3 years back pay in child support..... Now when I really need it..... I get screwed lol

[Hazard]

The courts often and intentionally err on the the side of financial responsibility unfiarly falling on the responsible parent. They do so knowing this is the one that ill ensure the child and their needs will be taken care of no matter what, It s screwed up but in a weird way it makes sense. Would you put the lions share of a child well being on an irresponsible ****wad? of course not - neither woud they.

Exactly why I have custody..... But Jesus Christ..... Atleast contribute. He hardly had to change a diaper, she Wasnt woken up at night, she didnt have to potty train or teach her manners. I did ALL of it..... While working full time.

I'm just bitter lol

[Hazard]

To put this in meathead terms......


This daycare cost is growth hormone cost. I Wasnt spending the money on it anyways lol but it chaps my ass to think I can buy it with the kind of money I'm spending

[jimmyinkedup]

Exactly why I have custody..... But Jesus Christ..... Atleast contribute. He hardly had to change a diaper, she Wasnt woken up at night, she didnt have to potty train or teach her manners. I did ALL of it..... While working full time.

I'm just bitter lol

Oh im with you bro. I pay for a child that isnt even mine while her deadbeat dad is a total ****ing bum and pays dick. Yeah its a choice but of course Im going to raise her like she is my own. She didnt ask for her dad to be a total ****ing loser. Anyway I feel your pain bro./ I ponied up the first of 4- $700 tuition payments for Catholic school for her this year. I think you know it would be nice if the asshole could at least pay for a few books or something, anything but it isnt gonna happen. The system is ****ed, totally ****ed and I dont see it ever being right.

[Hazard]

I'm thankful that I have someone in my life that treats her like her own. What you do for that child goes above and beyond. They won't forget it..... THAT is a real superhero. It's also cool that we're built like em too ;-)

I meet with my ex this weekend to talk about some form of payment. Hopefully I can squeeze half of the daycare cost out of her.

[jimmyinkedup]

I'm thankful that I have someone in my life that treats her like her own. What you do for that child goes above and beyond. They won't forget it..... THAT is a real superhero. It's also cool that we're built like em too ;-)

I meet with my ex this weekend to talk about some form of payment. Hopefully I can squeeze half of the daycare cost out of her.

Good luck brother - I hope you can work something out to benefit your little one man.

[hawk14dl]

Good luck man. I know it sucks, I'm in the exact same spot. Had full custody since she was 6 months old (she turns 6 years next month). I've received a total of $43 from her.

[Hazard]

Good luck man. I know it sucks, I'm in the exact same spot. Had full custody since she was 6 months old (she turns 6 years next month). I've received a total of $43 from her.

That's insane.....

And had it been the other way around..... Your ass would have been in court with wages being garnished

[hawk14dl]

That's the only reason I got that money from her. They were supposed to be garnishing her wages, but they weren't. Called lawyer (paid $100) got another order sent to her employer and they withheld one checks worth then never again. It's not worth $100 to me, just to get 43 back.

[DOSA]

Exactly why I have custody..... But Jesus Christ..... Atleast contribute. He hardly had to change a diaper, she Wasnt woken up at night, she didnt have to potty train or teach her manners. I did ALL of it..... While working full time.

I'm just bitter lol

This is what makes you a great dad. You are a class act my friend, wish more fathers were like you.

[GirlyGymRat]

Exactly why I have custody..... But Jesus Christ..... Atleast contribute. He hardly had to change a diaper, she Wasnt woken up at night, she didnt have to potty train or teach her manners. I did ALL of it..... While working full time. I'm just bitter lol

Your daughter knows you and knows who loves her and cares for her.

[GirlyGymRat]

The courts often and intentionally err on the the side of financial responsibility unfiarly falling on the responsible parent. They do so knowing this is the one that ill ensure the child and their needs will be taken care of no matter what, It s screwed up but in a weird way it makes sense. Would you put the lions share of a child well being on an irresponsible ****wad? of course not - neither woud they.

^^^ makes sense but doesn't feel right neither

[lovbyts]

I was awarded $25 a month when I won custody even though she claimed she made more than me when she was trying to win custody.

I found SSI death benefits are a lot more reliable and pay every month up to the child's 18th birthday. I gor around $325 a month.

You guys are going about it all wrong. We should talk.

[lovbyts]

I'm thankful that I have someone in my life that treats her like her own. What you do for that child goes above and beyond. They won't forget it..... THAT is a real superhero. It's also cool that we're built like em too ;-)

I meet with my ex this weekend to talk about some form of payment. Hopefully I can squeeze half of the daycare cost out of her.

I would forgo the money to not have the ex in her life if I had a choice. Sometimes its for the best but most times you dont have a choice.

[Hazard]

I would forgo the money to not have the ex in her life if I had a choice. Sometimes its for the best but most times you dont have a choice.

Unfortunately..... I have no choice. It's a joint custody but I'm the custodial parent. She has to be consulted with major medical decisions and schooling.

I let the money go for 3 years almost..... But she's beginning to become a bigger pain in my ass (my ex) - so I figured if she wants to acquire more responsibility - she can fvcking financially contribute too.

[GirlyGymRat]

Unfortunately..... I have no choice. It's a joint custody but I'm the custodial parent. She has to be consulted with major medical decisions and schooling. I let the money go for 3 years almost..... But she's beginning to become a bigger pain in my ass (my ex) - so I figured if she wants to acquire more responsibility - she can fvcking financially contribute too.

^^^ the other party should have to provide for a child they brought into this world!

Make her pay

Don't fall for any bs stories about how she doesn't have enough $ for food, rent. Blah blah blah. That is not your problem. don't allow her problems to become your problems.

[Dougiefresh7707]

Anyone out there paying? I have custodial custody of my daughter. She's going on 3yrs old and to date my ex hasn't paid a dime. To be fair.... I havnt asked. I'm now enrolling my daughter in daycare and the cost is crazy. It's about time she helps. Unfortunately as I use the child support calculater it doesn't say she owes me anything that will really help me lol. I'm at a loss. She would owe me around $300/mo - daycare is 3 times that. Wtf is wrong with this system?

What state are you in? I have my daughter 40-40% of the time and still pay $500 a month.

[kelkel]

Proud of all you guys doing this stuff pretty much on your own. The reward is well worth the effort.

[lovbyts]

Proud of all you guys doing this stuff pretty much on your own. The reward is well worth the effort.

Wait what? No body told me about a reward for doing this.

My daughter just turned 21 and we are going skydiving tomorrow for her birthday.

[songdog]

The best thing to do is get a laywer.You dont get jacked around in court if you have one.My wife played that game and got screwed all the time.I got her a lawyer and the table turned.Sad but true.Now in NY if you owe I believe 1000.oo in back child support.They take your drivers lic until you catch up.

[Hazard]

What state are you in? I have my daughter 40-40% of the time and still pay $500 a month.

Jersey..... Not very man friendly

[Rwy]

Keep at iT Haz. Karma will come back in your favor one day

[jimmyinkedup]

Jersey..... Not very man friendly

Ahh man, one of the least man friendly their is. I have a friend that really got the bad end of the stick based on Jersey child Support/custody Laws, almost hard to believe and if I didnt know him and the things he was saying were 100% true I would have had a hard time believing him and that in this day and age it was really that way...but in Jersey it really is. Press on Haz, the re is a greater good here and the good part is regardless of what happens in this aspect your doing it for your little girl.

[Hazard]

Ahh man, one of the least man friendly their is. I have a friend that really got the bad end of the stick based on Jersey child Support/custody Laws, almost hard to believe and if I didnt know him and the things he was saying were 100% true I would have had a hard time believing him and that in this day and age it was really that way...but in Jersey it really is. Press on Haz, the re is a greater good here and the good part is regardless of what happens in this aspect your doing it for your little girl.

Yea well that's what keeps u going.....

[lovbyts]

Just wait until she turns 13 and says you have never done anything for her and she hates you... Got to love puberty and hormones. LoL

Enjoy it while you can, it goes by quick. They get better again in their early 20s or at least they stop thinking you are stupid.

[Hazard]

Just wait until she turns 13 and says you have never done anything for her and she hates you... Got to love puberty and hormones. LoL

Enjoy it while you can, it goes by quick. They get better again in their early 20s or at least they stop thinking you are stupid.

The last 2 1/2 years have flown by......

Right now she loves daddy more than anything. School will demonize her too I'm sure lol

[lovbyts]

The last 2 1/2 years have flown by......

Right now she loves daddy more than anything. School will demonize her too I'm sure lol

That's a fact. My daughter spoke Very clear before going to school and I got tons of comments and complements about how clear she spoke. 3 months into school that ended. Not as bad as most but not the same as before.

[Hazard]

That's a fact. My daughter spoke Very clear before going to school and I got tons of comments and complements about how clear she spoke. 3 months into school that ended. Not as bad as most but not the same as before.

I took her to the doc today for her immunizations. She saw daddy get a shot so her first one she didnt even cry. The 2nd she got scared and her 3rd one was outa control.

They measured her height..... She's in the 80th percentile but 20th percentile for weight. She's a skinny kid haha.

I thank my lucky stars man. She very well mannered, her speech isn't 100%.... Her L's are like W's sometimes. She's very smart tho and got the potty training down after a week. No diaper required and she's not even 3

[lovbyts]

Haha I'm surprised they didnt say she was malnourished. Now days if they are not 100lbs by age 10 they are not healthy. lol

I got lucky on the shots. Mine didnt even react to the 1st one, 2nd one she sort of frowned and the 3rd one must have stung because she started to tear up so I started laughing to distract her and asked the doctor if I could do the shot. A lot depends on the doctor/nurse and how they give the shot and of course if they hit a nerve or not since they do it in the thigh most of the time.

Yeah the W vs L is normal and sometimes has to do with the baby teeth. The whole potty training is a blur to me. I dont even remember it happening. lol 18 years ago. The new little one was 4 when she came here with her mom so she was already potty trained so I got to skip that one.

[Hazard]

Haha I'm surprised they didnt say she was malnourished. Now days if they are not 100lbs by age 10 they are not healthy. lol

I got lucky on the shots. Mine didnt even react to the 1st one, 2nd one she sort of frowned and the 3rd one must have stung because she started to tear up so I started laughing to distract her and asked the doctor if I could do the shot. A lot depends on the doctor/nurse and how they give the shot and of course if they hit a nerve or not since they do it in the thigh most of the time.

Yeah the W vs L is normal and sometimes has to do with the baby teeth. The whole potty training is a blur to me. I dont even remember it happening. lol 18 years ago. The new little one was 4 when she came here with her mom so she was already potty trained so I got to skip that one.

They asked me about her diet. I told them she eats like a horse and doesn't put weight on..... Its ridiculous. They want to measure her height and weight again the next time she comes in. They want to make sure she keeps gaining as she gets taller.

There's not much more I can do..... She eats fruits and meat. Not much veggies but I cant force them down her throat.

[Mp859]

They asked me about her diet. I told them she eats like a horse and doesn't put weight on..... Its ridiculous. They want to measure her height and weight again the next time she comes in. They want to make sure she keeps gaining as she gets taller. There's not much more I can do..... She eats fruits and meat. Not much veggies but I cant force them down her throat.

Does she even lift?

[lovbyts]

Does she even lift?

You got it wrong, Does she even wift...

[Mp859]

You got it wrong, Does she even wift...

that is definetly better

[ScotchGuard02]

Hang in there Hazard, you're doing a good thing for your daughter. Just protect yourself legally.