Dieforce

[Obs]

A thread for survivors of divorce... any kids? How many? What did you lose? Why did you lose it? Are you better off?... this will be an enduring thread. Late entries welcome.

[Reliable_Individual]

Not much personal experience to offer, but look up Louie ck talking about divorce. May offer some helpful/encourage words to those dealing with that shit right now

[songdog]

Gave the wife everything when she left.I was a over the road truck driver.She moved changed the kids last name not legally.I found them 18yrs later.She was a junkie and blew her inheiratance.I blame the the divorce on me but hiding my kids wasnt right.But she paid in the end.And yes I am better off.

[Obs]

5 kids, my idea to divorce, lost bunch of shit, she got lazy as shit and I buried myself in a comfortable fort of work. I am better off. I believe the kids are too. She is fuckt. Bout time someone did... I sure wasn't gonna!

[Obs]

Gave the wife everything when she left.I was a over the road truck driver.She moved changed the kids last name not legally.I found them 18yrs later.She was a junkie and blew her inheiratance.I blame the the divorce on me but hiding my kids wasnt right.But she paid in the end.And yes I am better off.

She sounds like a winner. Hopen you found one a shit ton better.

[numbere]

Gave the wife everything when she left.I was a over the road truck driver.She moved changed the kids last name not legally.I found them 18yrs later.She was a junkie and blew her inheiratance.I blame the the divorce on me but hiding my kids wasnt right.But she paid in the end.And yes I am better off.

Damn sdog that's really deep.

Definitely makes me think twice about getting married.

[BG]

Damn sdog that's really deep.

Definitely makes me think twice about getting married.

Marriage is tough at times and great at others. You have to be ready for the long haul, able to communicate very well with each other and CONSTANTLY work on the relationship. Just like anything else in life you get what you put into it and marriage is the same. My wife and I cant have kids and you may think thats easy/better but its not. It just the two of us, no buffer, no one else to focus on. After 14 years it takes work, we have a tendency to slowly grow apart, this is something a couple must look out for and stop asap. Once this happens it takes A TON of work by BOTH to get it back, most dont have it in them. My wife and I have separated 3 times in the past 5 years, but we learn and forge on together.

[diesel101]

I got divorced young after 4 1/2 years of marriage and 2 kids. We had nothing but debt and a house that we had just bought 6 months earlier. I took all the debt,house and gave her the one vehicle that we had paid for.
I took an extreme loss on the house when I sold it and worked 80-90 hours a week for 4 years to pay off the debt.We both made a point to be civil to each other for the kids sake and for the most part it worked out.

I remarried 3 years later to a complete angel who treated the kids as if they were her own.
I have any awesome marriage and just became a grandpa last week.
So there is life after divorce.

[songdog]

Hell I just found out tonight my was was leaving.Oh well I will stay a single man until I die.

[Sfla80]

Divorced, but no kids.

It was honestly easy for.me.

I gave her everything. When I found out she researched how much the house was, how.much a lawyer was, and so on, before bringing anything up to me what so ever . I knew it was over and.made it really easy on ourselves.

I asked for 1k for savings. Took my clothes and moved out.

Only thing was we ended up foreclosured on our house since we bought in the height of the economy and divorced when it fell.

200k condo turned into a 70k condo.

[Obs]

Divorced, but no kids.

It was honestly easy for.me.

I gave her everything. When I found out she researched how much the house was, how.much a lawyer was, and so on, before bringing anything up to me what so ever . I knew it was over and.made it really easy on ourselves.

I asked for 1k for savings. Took my clothes and moved out.

Only thing was we ended up foreclosured on our house since we bought in the height of the economy and divorced when it fell.

200k condo turned into a 70k condo.

Damn. They can be devious critters but a good one makes the world go around.

[Marsoc]

I met a hippie girl got her some weed and hung out one time and hit it. I was just a horn ball them being a man whore..went to prison and got home to find out I have a two year old son. Had a hard time excepting it. I wanted a family that's together and i can be with. Not a visit and a payment. I still don't think it's right what she did. But let's not get into a debate.

[Obs]

Temporary custody is a bitch. Hard to leave. My youngest two were stuck on me it's hard for them to go back to ma and hard for me to let them. But that which doesn't kill you... gives you arthritis, makes you pissy, and haunts you at night.

[diesel101]

A wise man told me once "that being married is like chaining yourself to bear
Then kicking the the bear"

[Obs]

Being married is good but it's for older folks I have decided. If you have much crazy left wait to have kids and settle in. No sense rushing. Big world, lotsa fish, by fish I mean vaginas. There are women that know how to deal with each specific man's shit and love him for it and vice versa. Takes a long time to find it.

[Obs]

Good friend of mine was just sent a picture of his woman at a bar with her hand on another guys crotch. My bud is well off, good looking, and a damn hard worker. He sent her the pic with the simple message "we are done". Sucks. That ho bag will never do half as good as him.
I just don't understand it. Bitch had the world handed to her with him and now she will wind up with a white trash fucktard like she had before him. I think I'm more pissed about it than he is. This guy literally told me several times when everyone was staring at chick's "dude there is no way I could ever cheat on anyone and I don't know what I would do if I was cheated on".
We are all human but god damn! People talk about karma and it's shit like this that proves to me that's all horse shit. This guy is fucking gold in a time of shit for morals. He is better off but I hate to see the guy fucking suffer and I know he is hurting. People.... when you want to fuck a new person fucking call it quits with your significant other first. It's not that God damn complicated! YOU CAN NOT HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO! I'm sure this rant sounds dumb as shit and immature but I hope this sinks in to some dumb shits head that needs to read it!

[hammerheart]

Sometimes I feel kind of lucky being completely disinterested in women, be it sex or relationship.

[Euroholic]

Sometimes I feel kind of lucky being completely disinterested in women, be it sex or relationship.

Really? Ive read about that mate

[hammerheart]

Really? Ive read about that mate

What did you read?

[Euroholic]

What did you read?

That there are some blokes out there who are not interested about women. I went through a phase where i never wanted to bang again. But now im keen again haha

[calgarian]

I have no experience in this department. But my concern is kids. How often do you spend time with them? I feel for songdog when he couldnt find his kids for 18 years what a fvcking cvnt. I have noticed since I got kids I am very touchy and emotional on kids matter ( and No I dont have high estrogen level)

[hammerheart]

That there are some blokes out there who are not interested about women. I went through a phase where i never wanted to bang again. But now im keen again haha

Well I haven't been always this way, but again I ask myself if this advantages me after all.

[tarmyg]

Been married 16 years this year and what BG said above is very true. She was very young, 23, and I was 28 when we got married so 16 years later you are not really married to the same person anymore. We are constantly working on our relationship as that is what marriage is, a work in progress. It never stops! When you stop or one of you stops it will die very quickly. We always talk about everything no matter how painful or long it takes to resolve and that is what I, personally, have found work best for us. Always approaching the other person when issues arrive. Some bury it and that never works, pain always rears it's ugly head one day if you have not dealt with it.

[Obs]

Sometimes I feel kind of lucky being completely disinterested in women, be it sex or relationship.

I'm no monk. I'm a horny bastard but I cannot stand cheaters. Just the way I was raised I guess. Getting your pecker wet is not worth the damage you do to your spouse/girlfriend. Most all get caught whether they know it or not.

[Obs]

I have no experience in this department. But my concern is kids. How often do you spend time with them? I feel for songdog when he couldnt find his kids for 18 years what a fvcking cvnt. I have noticed since I got kids I am very touchy and emotional on kids matter ( and No I dont have high estrogen level)

I see my kids every other weekend which isn't enough. I my little girl hangs on dad every second she can and we share a special connection. She would rather live with dad because I spoil her Im sure. Custody will change. But for now it is what it is

[calgarian]

I see my kids every other weekend which isn't enough. I my little girl hangs on dad every second she can and we share a special connection. She would rather live with dad because I spoil her Im sure. Custody will change. But for now it is what it is

Good for you. But I am more concern about the long term effects on children. Yes they are very adaptive . There is a girl in my kids school KG. She always very quite and shy, so after a week I asked her dad how she is doing? and he said she is always quite these days , she spend her whole day is day care. Not trying to blame dad or mom just concerned about the kids. and OBS you should see if court lets you see your kids EW they sure grow older really really fast.

[Obs]

Good for you. But I am more concern about the long term effects on children. Yes they are very adaptive . There is a girl in my kids school KG. She always very quite and shy, so after a week I asked her dad how she is doing? and he said she is always quite these days , she spend her whole day is day care. Not trying to blame dad or mom just concerned about the kids. and OBS you should see if court lets you see your kids EW they sure grow older really really fast.

When I am done, which will be when I'm dead, I will have them most of or all the time. I told her specifically if I don't like the outcome of custody I will come back and file again until I run your ass outta money. I have succeeded in that. My kids stay with me 98% of the time when I have custody. I don't do daycare or babysitters and yes that affects them. I personally believe it can quickly isolate them emotionally and callous them. The world needs parents. Hate that I failed in marriage but only because of what it does to my kids. TO ANYONE OUT THERE DATING: IF YOU ARE NOT COMPLETELY HAPPY BREAK IT OFF AND MOVE ON. The pain brought on by a relationship held together by untrue feelings can and will bring down a world of hurt. Done being doctor Phil now.

[DocToxin8]

I'm going through it right now, got my papers of separation just some weeks ago. We are civil to each other, but she doesn't want to end the relationship, she wants us to work though it. Sadly, I don't think that's possible.
We're just not meant to be, but I hope we can be friends.

One thing though, I never though I would cheat on anyone, but with her I eventually did. I wasn't content with what I had and decided I could be true to myself or continue a life of some discontent. I allready suspected at this point that I wanted to end the relationship, but for reasons i won't go into, ending the relationship was practically impossible.
So I cheated, and justified it with that there was no connection between me and the women I lay with, ensuring that there would be no embarrassment for my wife even if she found out.
(One thing is to feel betrayed by cheating, another is to feel humiliated by knowing who the other party are. A faceless "nobody" that no friends or known people could relate to would IMO be better.)
I've been cheated to myself, and what bothered me most wasn't the cheating, but that she cheated with such garbage, as it made me look bad, it made us both look bad.

Have she cheated on me too?
Maybe sexually, I don't know.
Emotionally, absolutely she has.
But to be fair, I only know she did that for certain quite recently, and I bear no ill will. Actually it's a relief.

It's a proper mess allright. That's for sure.

[Obs]

I'm going through it right now, got my papers of separation just some weeks ago. We are civil to each other, but she doesn't want to end the relationship, she wants us to work though it. Sadly, I don't think that's possible.
We're just not meant to be, but I hope we can be friends.

One thing though, I never though I would cheat on anyone, but with her I eventually did. I wasn't content with what I had and decided I could be true to myself or continue a life of some discontent. I allready suspected at this point that I wanted to end the relationship, but for reasons i won't go into, ending the relationship was practically impossible.
So I cheated, and justified it with that there was no connection between me and the women I lay with, ensuring that there would be no embarrassment for my wife even if she found out.
(One thing is to feel betrayed by cheating, another is to feel humiliated by knowing who the other party are. A faceless "nobody" that no friends or known people could relate to would IMO be better.)
I've been cheated to myself, and what bothered me most wasn't the cheating, but that she cheated with such garbage, as it made me look bad, it made us both look bad.

Have she cheated on me too?
Maybe sexually, I don't know.
Emotionally, absolutely she has.
But to be fair, I only know she did that for certain quite recently, and I bear no ill will. Actually it's a relief.

It's a proper mess allright. That's for sure.

At least you ended it. Throw five kids and years of accumulation in the mix and you have a compounded disaster. It's like stacking blocks on an ice bridge and watching the temperature rise. Two people, who could easily live without the other, pretending there is something there when there isnt. This shit will haunt me on my death bed though I know it.

[DocToxin8]

At least you ended it. Throw five kids and years of accumulation in the mix and you have a compounded disaster. It's like stacking blocks on an ice bridge and watching the temperature rise. Two people, who could easily live without the other, pretending there is something there when there isnt. This shit will haunt me on my death bed though I know it.

That sounds as about as bad as it gets, but with kids I think it's even more important to split up when you should.
There's a lesson for the kids too in this; stay unhappy or leave and seek happiness. Ofcourse I'm not qualified, probably can't have kids, no interest in it either so far. I think the best thing about kids is that I can have a good time with time and take care of them a couple of days, and then hand then back to their parents. To have them constantly around, nah, that's not for me.
I might change on this issue m, but it's allready getting very late, and it's not something that would be practically easy to accomplish either.

Right now I'm at a girlfriend place, gonna stay for a one more day and night.
Just learned that my ex wife definitely has cheated on me too.
I don't know if that's a normal reaction, but I feel relief.
It just confirms this is the right course of action.

[DocToxin8]

But really, the last year before we split up (and we haven't ended it 100% yet either, although that's not far away now), I wasn't happy.
Sex life and all was ok, but I didn't feel comfortable.
Friends stopped visiting because of the atmosphere and so on.

When it comes to dividing our shit; that is for the most part easy.
I just want the stuff that was mine before we became together.
She gets the house, the furniture and all that shit.
Only problem is the dog. Which is legally hers.
And she's told me that if she finds a reason to be vindictive,
She'll rather place the dog with some stranger so that I'll never see it again,
than let me have it.
Problem is, she can't handle the dog herself, so she'll need someone to help her.
She's beginning to realize that, and although I want to help and share custody, it's a mess, so to be cynical the best thing is to let her have it for as much as possible, so that she'll give it to a mutual friend of us.
If he has the dog, then I can get involved again (and she too),
but I can't let her use the dog to dictate how we're going to interact.
This part is what bothers me most. Cause I love that dog.

[BG]

I'm going through it right now, got my papers of separation just some weeks ago. We are civil to each other, but she doesn't want to end the relationship, she wants us to work though it. Sadly, I don't think that's possible.
We're just not meant to be, but I hope we can be friends.

One thing though, I never though I would cheat on anyone, but with her I eventually did. I wasn't content with what I had and decided I could be true to myself or continue a life of some discontent. I allready suspected at this point that I wanted to end the relationship, but for reasons i won't go into, ending the relationship was practically impossible.
So I cheated, and justified it with that there was no connection between me and the women I lay with, ensuring that there would be no embarrassment for my wife even if she found out.
(One thing is to feel betrayed by cheating, another is to feel humiliated by knowing who the other party are. A faceless "nobody" that no friends or known people could relate to would IMO be better.)
I've been cheated to myself, and what bothered me most wasn't the cheating, but that she cheated with such garbage, as it made me look bad, it made us both look bad.

Have she cheated on me too?
Maybe sexually, I don't know.
Emotionally, absolutely she has.
But to be fair, I only know she did that for certain quite recently, and I bear no ill will. Actually it's a relief.

It's a proper mess allright. That's for sure.

I used to feel the same way for a long time, once I stopped the gear my mind set changed. Do you think steroids are having any effect on how your thinking? Do you ever think about that? When did your feelings change or what may have caused them?

[NACH3]

I used to feel the same way for a long time, once I stopped the gear my mind set changed. Do you think steroids are having any effect on how your thinking? Do you ever think about that? When did your feelings change or what may have caused them?

BG - I believe steroids did indeed effect my relationship w/my ex fiancé... she being an endocrinologist didn't want that linked to her yet she knew I was suffering from low T at the same time! Hard for us both and caused some major miscommunication...

All in all steroids had a definite impact on these decisions for myself!

[DocToxin8]

I used to feel the same way for a long time, once I stopped the gear my mind set changed. Do you think steroids are having any effect on how your thinking? Do you ever think about that? When did your feelings change or what may have caused them?

How I am supposed to know the answer?
I was on AAS when I became her friend, when we dated, when we married, and still I am on AAS.
But yes, some AAS does influence my thinking.
I also went for some time without any AAS, (by some time I mean almost two months), and I noticed an extreme aggression, though it didn't impact her that much, or hmm, I snapped back faster.
But in our relationship I've been the silent one, she's been yelling.
However, that said, while it might seem to our friends, etc that I was very patient, when I did snap back my words carried that much more weight,
and at the end I snapped back easier and easier.
I did really not like the person I was becoming.
After all, she was mostly hysterical and just yelling, I was unknowingly much more calculated in my come backs. Hence why I try to keep my mouth shut.

I don't know, she's said some really low things. Who's worst?
It's dead now, time to move on, will be better for both.

[Obs]

How I am supposed to know the answer?
I was on AAS when I became her friend, when we dated, when we married, and still I am on AAS.
But yes, some AAS does influence my thinking.
I also went for some time without any AAS, (by some time I mean almost two months), and I noticed an extreme aggression, though it didn't impact her that much, or hmm, I snapped back faster.
But in our relationship I've been the silent one, she's been yelling.
However, that said, while it might seem to our friends, etc that I was very patient, when I did snap back my words carried that much more weight,
and at the end I snapped back easier and easier.
I did really not like the person I was becoming.
After all, she was mostly hysterical and just yelling, I was unknowingly much more calculated in my come backs. Hence why I try to keep my mouth shut.

I don't know, she's said some really low things. Who's worst?
It's dead now, time to move on, will be better for both.

I could tell you some out of this world stories of me and my ex fighting. I think about bad shit we did to each other late at night when I'm about to fall asleep and my eyes snap open. I used to put myself back to sleep with alcohol. Gear took care of that shit. Fuck looking back. What is done is done. I hope you get a nice, hot chick and I hope she only has eyes for you and likes doing things for you. I hope she knows where to get queludes, if your into that, and I hope you feel the same way about her. I hope she has a big nice ass and a set of tits that could pass for store bought. I hope she warns you when she farts and tells you if you have a booger hanging. She will be your right arm but better, because she can reach your ass to inject. She will help you fail every set nice and slow. She will be good with money and plan for the worst. You will want to do everything with her because she is a blast. She will not be deceitful or secretive but an open book for your eyes only. WHEN YOU FIND HER GIVE HER MY NUMBER.

[BG]

How I am supposed to know the answer?
I was on AAS when I became her friend, when we dated, when we married, and still I am on AAS.
But yes, some AAS does influence my thinking.
I also went for some time without any AAS, (by some time I mean almost two months), and I noticed an extreme aggression, though it didn't impact her that much, or hmm, I snapped back faster.
But in our relationship I've been the silent one, she's been yelling.
However, that said, while it might seem to our friends, etc that I was very patient, when I did snap back my words carried that much more weight,
and at the end I snapped back easier and easier.
I did really not like the person I was becoming.
After all, she was mostly hysterical and just yelling, I was unknowingly much more calculated in my come backs. Hence why I try to keep my mouth shut.

I don't know, she's said some really low things. Who's worst?
It's dead now, time to move on, will be better for both.

Gotcha buddy. I wasnt judging you at all, I dont even know very much about you. I just know for myself and many other BB'rs I know now look back and realized it was the gear that was giving them the train of thought they weren't happy and the relationship was not good. I had the same exact thoughts, I told my wife 100 times that I was 100% sure we werent meant to be together. I dropped down to trt levels, we talked and worked things out. Marriage has never been better. BB'ing and gear use made me very selfish and prideful. Come to find out those are the two of the biggest downfalls of man. Good luck brother, theres only good to come.

[BG]

BG - I believe steroids did indeed effect my relationship w/my ex fiancé... she being an endocrinologist didn't want that linked to her yet she knew I was suffering from low T at the same time! Hard for us both and caused some major miscommunication...

All in all steroids had a definite impact on these decisions for myself!

With you buddy, nearly ruined my life. Bad decision after bad decision, I got way off track.

[NACH3]

With you buddy, nearly ruined my life. Bad decision after bad decision, I got way off track.

Same here buddy... I got way off track myself!

[Obs]

Same here buddy... I got way off track myself!

In gears defense, I made some really fucked up decisions without it. Just sayin'...

[Euroholic]

BG - I believe steroids did indeed effect my relationship w/my ex fiancé... she being an endocrinologist didn't want that linked to her yet she knew I was suffering from low T at the same time! Hard for us both and caused some major miscommunication...

All in all steroids had a definite impact on these decisions for myself!

Not to pry but Thats a body builders dream woman ay. A looker who can get you pharm grade juice