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Thread: Almost on America's Dumbest criminals

  1. #1
    Sicko's Avatar
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    Almost on America's Dumbest criminals

    So hear me out on my sphincter clenching moment I had last night.
    I was flying back to Cali last night after spending the weekend with my family. I have been out in Cali for over a year now doing a construction project. I decided to pack all my winter clothes that I brought out here and check the luggage to lighten the load when I return home in September.
    This left me with an empty suitcase when I flew back to Cali last night. So I threw my back pack (which I usually take as a carry on) and toiletries, sandals and my Chucks in the suitcase and decided just to take it all as one carry on. (it's a small suitcase).
    Well I also threw in a large bottle of Zzzquil, a 100ml of my vape juice, a large bottle of cologne and a 10ml of test. I don't trip about putting the Test in my luggage when I fly as I am on TRT. (however my prescription is expired, They started getting to expensive) What I didn't think about was my decision to take this all as a carry on.
    As I am waiting for my luggage to pass thru the X-ray I suddenly realized what I had done.
    I put the Test in a Ziplock back along with the 100ml of vape juice. Not only that the Zzzquil was the giant family size bottle.
    I instantly started to panic on the inside as I realized that the Zzzquil and the vape juice were over the allowable quantities of liquids permitted in carry on luggage.
    Sure enough as I watched in terror the lady pulled my luggage for secondary inspection!!!
    Oh crap!! what a retard I am... So the guy asks me if this is my bag and I say "yes". He says he needs to search it and are there any sharp objects...Luckily I didn't have any pins on this trip.
    Now I am really starting to sweat as he starts pulling out my stuff. I was so angry that I carelessly overlooked my actions. I knew once he innocently pulled out the vape juice due to it's size that the Test was going to be right in his hands as well...
    Well trip on this...So I had put the vape juice, Test baggy in one of my Chucks and the cologne in the other shoe. He didn't get to the shoe with the vape juice and Test. Must have thought that the Zzzquil and cologne were the culprits of the secondary scan. Did a swipe test on both of them and sent me on my way.
    I admit... my knees were shakin a little bit. I was pretty certain that I would not have ended up in jail for the one vial of Test but I sure would have missed my flight and ended up with a court date and all the other drama had it been discovered.
    Silly mistake could have cost me a ton of problems!!! Even though it was a small amount for medicinal purposes, without having the proper prescription on hand there surly would have been some penalties.
    Another example of how God is Good!!
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  2. #2
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    A friend of mine did something similar. He was out fishing and forgot that He had home defense rounds in the gun. So He swapped mags and cleared the chamber and put the round in his bag. Fast forward a couple weeks and he was flying and took that same bag. He Got through security and took the round and utility knife on the plane. Here is the shitty part. He didn't discover this until He had flown there and back.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sicko View Post
    So hear me out on my sphincter clenching moment I had last night.
    I was flying back to Cali last night after spending the weekend with my family. I have been out in Cali for over a year now doing a construction project. I decided to pack all my winter clothes that I brought out here and check the luggage to lighten the load when I return home in September.
    This left me with an empty suitcase when I flew back to Cali last night. So I threw my back pack (which I usually take as a carry on) and toiletries, sandals and my Chucks in the suitcase and decided just to take it all as one carry on. (it's a small suitcase).
    Well I also threw in a large bottle of Zzzquil, a 100ml of my vape juice, a large bottle of cologne and a 10ml of test. I don't trip about putting the Test in my luggage when I fly as I am on TRT. (however my prescription is expired, They started getting to expensive) What I didn't think about was my decision to take this all as a carry on.
    As I am waiting for my luggage to pass thru the X-ray I suddenly realized what I had done.
    I put the Test in a Ziplock back along with the 100ml of vape juice. Not only that the Zzzquil was the giant family size bottle.
    I instantly started to panic on the inside as I realized that the Zzzquil and the vape juice were over the allowable quantities of liquids permitted in carry on luggage.
    Sure enough as I watched in terror the lady pulled my luggage for secondary inspection!!!
    Oh crap!! what a retard I am... So the guy asks me if this is my bag and I say "yes". He says he needs to search it and are there any sharp objects...Luckily I didn't have any pins on this trip.
    Now I am really starting to sweat as he starts pulling out my stuff. I was so angry that I carelessly overlooked my actions. I knew once he innocently pulled out the vape juice due to it's size that the Test was going to be right in his hands as well...
    Well trip on this...So I had put the vape juice, Test baggy in one of my Chucks and the cologne in the other shoe. He didn't get to the shoe with the vape juice and Test. Must have thought that the Zzzquil and cologne were the culprits of the secondary scan. Did a swipe test on both of them and sent me on my way.
    I admit... my knees were shakin a little bit. I was pretty certain that I would not have ended up in jail for the one vial of Test but I sure would have missed my flight and ended up with a court date and all the other drama had it been discovered.
    Silly mistake could have cost me a ton of problems!!! Even though it was a small amount for medicinal purposes, without having the proper prescription on hand there surly would have been some penalties.
    Another example of how God is Good!!
    Lol. Sounds like me but I would have gotten caught.

    Sent from my SM-S902L using Tapatalk

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by MuscleScience View Post
    A friend of mine did something similar. He was out fishing and forgot that He had home defense rounds in the gun. So He swapped mags and cleared the chamber and put the round in his bag. Fast forward a couple weeks and he was flying and took that same bag. He Got through security and took the round and utility knife on the plane. Here is the shitty part. He didn't discover this until He had flown there and back.
    oh damn!

    i would not get that lucky!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by MuscleScience View Post
    A friend of mine did something similar. He was out fishing and forgot that He had home defense rounds in the gun. So He swapped mags and cleared the chamber and put the round in his bag. Fast forward a couple weeks and he was flying and took that same bag. He Got through security and took the round and utility knife on the plane. Here is the shitty part. He didn't discover this until He had flown there and back.
    hah!! funny!! once again prolly wouldn't have resulted in any thing more than an uncomfortable cavity search and of course the real issue of it all is that he/me would now be on their radar.
    I like to think I fly low these days. Not trying to be a "person of interest" to any organization as I used to be labeled.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by CharlesThe4th View Post
    Lol. Sounds like me but I would have gotten caught.

    Sent from my SM-S902L using Tapatalk
    Believe me... I was already practicing the speech I was going to give the TSA agents. Trying to be precognitive in all the questions they would ask and the responses I would give and reactions to my responses...all in 5 minutes of Hell while I waited for what I was certain to be an moment to remember in the life of a retard! ehehehhheh...
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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by MuscleScience View Post
    A friend of mine did something similar. He was out fishing and forgot that He had home defense rounds in the gun. So He swapped mags and cleared the chamber and put the round in his bag. Fast forward a couple weeks and he was flying and took that same bag. He Got through security and took the round and utility knife on the plane. Here is the shitty part. He didn't discover this until He had flown there and back.
    Good Lord!
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sicko View Post
    Believe me... I was already practicing the speech I was going to give the TSA agents. Trying to be precognitive in all the questions they would ask and the responses I would give and reactions to my responses...all in 5 minutes of Hell while I waited for what I was certain to be an moment to remember in the life of a retard! ehehehhheh...
    Best thing to do in that situation is to stay quiet. Request a lawyer immediately. Cops will twist and put words right in your mouth. I learned early on with police encounters to be very polite and respectful but request a lawyer if they decided to talk to further than asking for a drivers license and insurance. I've met some great policeman and I've met the ones who will throw a bag of drugs under your seat in a heartbeat.

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  9. #9
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    Unless you're attempting to carry on something of high danger, they normally just confiscate the item in question. Worst case scenario they would just tossed the test.

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