S.O.S. Got a dilema

[BigPimpin76]

Few months ago I caught my wife cheating with my step daughters father.
After a rough time I decided to forgive her and move on.

I married my wife when my stepdaughter was around 2 years old. So , she loves me like her father and I love her too.
Her real father has been present through out all these years and as a matter of fact , I got along with him quite ok in terms of respect towards each other.

Plenty of times i did notice some jealous remarks on how i was with her daughter and it’s understandable!

I believe that he noticed that i had more power over him in that regard with how I was more than a father that he was.

I suspect it was one of the main reasons as of why he wanted to gain control over his ex girl.. my wife. So i guess one thing led to another to the point I caught them with suspicious phoncalls on my wife’s phone bill.

Anyways like mentioned, I caught them and after a few months of healing I stayed with my wife.

Now to the point of dilemma.

I want to avoid seing this guy at any chance possible. From my point of view I want to keep at a distance.

As of today, its my stepdaughters high school graduation.
I decided to keep it fair and go to the reception and not the graduation party where all parents and close ones and friends are invited.

(Things in this manner work different in Central America in regards to graduations etc)

So at the party the graduates walk on the catwalk literally with their parent. Lets say father walks with daughter etc...

For me to see that scene is like not in the mood.
To me after what happened, and seeing how hipocritical it will be is like a big NO.
Also his whole family there, my wife etc is very uncomfortable.

I feel like if I go the after party is like giving the victory over my wife and her ex.

Is my EGO? Am I wrong or what do you Bros think
Hope to hear some comments


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[almostgone]

This is your daughter/step-daughters day. If it was me, I would ask her what she wants; it's a huge day for her.
If she can't or doesn't want to decide, strap up, tighten your boots, and go ahead and work this out with her biological father ahead of time.

That's just what I would do, even if I didn't want to see the guy, simply because this is her graduation.

[Capebuffalo]

I agree with AG. Ask your step daughter what she would like to happen. It’s her day. And you’ve been the constant dad day in day out.

[BigPimpin76]

This is your daughter/step-daughters day. If it was me, I would ask her what she wants; it's a huge day for her.
If she can't or doesn't want to decide, strap up, tighten your boots, and go ahead and work this out with her biological father ahead of time.

That's just what I would do, even if I didn't want to see the guy, simply because this is her graduation.

True, its a tough one!! Of course she wants me to go!
Im going to keep it fair to the reception which is the most important.
The after party is dinner beverages, the walk thing etc


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[David LoPan]

A child does not have to be biologically yours for you to love them like your own. Sounds to me like your raised her and she is your daughter. I have two kids, not mine biologically, and I never call them step kids unless someone asks (we have different last names). I would go and make it a very special day for YOUR daughter and make that POS fell like crap for not being the father that he should have been. He will always be her "dad" but your her Father. Who cares if he and her mother are going to be unconfortable, good they should be. Just ignor it and do everything to make it the best day for your daughter.

I have been in this type of situation several times and I can tell you this. In the years to come, you will either will be saying "I wish I would have gone or I am glad I did". Be glad you did.

[Capebuffalo]

True, its a tough one!! Of course she wants me to go!
Im going to keep it fair to the reception which is the most important.
The after party is dinner beverages, the walk thing etc


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Fly me down. I take care of the dad. You have an alibi. Win win.

[BigPimpin76]

Fly me down. I take care of the dad. You have an alibi. Win win.

Thanks my brother!! The thought is what matters!


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[BigPimpin76]

A child does not have to be biologically yours for you to love them like your own. Sounds to me like your raised her and she is your daughter. I have two kids, not mine biologically, and I never call them step kids unless someone asks (we have different last names). I would go and make it a very special day for YOUR daughter and make that POS fell like crap for not being the father that he should have been. He will always be her "dad" but your her Father. Who cares if he and her mother are going to be unconfortable, good they should be. Just ignor it and do everything to make it the best day for your daughter.

I have been in this type of situation several times and I can tell you this. In the years to come, you will either will be saying "I wish I would have gone or I am glad I did". Be glad you did.

You are completely right... even if i suspect my wife of cheating with thAt POS I should go!
It Takes balls!!!
My wife act all fresh like nothing ever happened.
But then on the other hand its a good therapy to kill the ego!!
Its a kind act towards my daughter who truly Loves me and a good honor to someday find that special woman who will love me and viceversa.
Except that I will not cheat on my wife, I will tell her that I found someone special and that I will be with her.
Karma or payback from the Universe is motherf@qer!
They will get a portion of it in return


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[almostgone]

True, its a tough one!! Of course she wants me to go!
Im going to keep it fair to the reception which is the most important.
The after party is dinner beverages, the walk thing etc


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As long as that satisfies your daughter, then I would roll with it. However, if she wants you to walk her her down the catwalk, then work it out with the other guy, however aggravating it may be.

[almostgone]

True, its a tough one!! Of course she wants me to go!
Im going to keep it fair to the reception which is the most important.
The after party is dinner beverages, the walk thing etc


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As long as that satisfies your daughter, then I would roll with it. However, if she wants you to walk her her down the catwalk, then work it out with the other guy, however aggravating it may be.

[Obs]

My wife left me for someone she lasted two weeks with.
She begged for me back for two years.

"You made your fucking decision, you will live with it forever." - my response every time.

Forgiveness for a cheater? Yep, I forgave her.
That doesn't mean she will ever get a second shot.

It's hard seeing her alone now. I know the pain and regret in her eyes. That's why I forgave her.
I don't allow people to break our most sacred promise but once.

I could have cheated a thousand times but didn't. I made a vow.

[BigPimpin76]

My wife left me for someone she lasted two weeks with.
She begged for me back for two years.

"You made your fucking decision, you will live with it forever." - my response every time.

Forgiveness for a cheater? Yep, I forgave her.
That doesn't mean she will ever get a second shot.

It's hard seeing her alone now. I know the pain and regret in her eyes. That's why I forgave her.
I don't allow people to break our most sacred promise but once.

I could have cheated a thousand times but didn't. I made a vow.

I hear you brother!!
I pretty much stayed and forgave but not forgotten what my wife did.
I stayed due to the fact of my two biological kids.
I decided to tough if out until they get to 18 years of age.
After that point when my kids get more mature I will see what road I will take.
As of now i kept the peace and mental health of them. I think I made a wise decision !

As of my wife, it will always be in her consciousness. Im the better man and Karma has to deal with her.
When Karma comes, then she can’t say anything for something she did


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[Obs]

I hear you brother!!
I pretty much stayed and forgave but not forgotten what my wife did.
I stayed due to the fact of my two biological kids.
I decided to tough if out until they get to 18 years of age.
After that point when my kids get more mature I will see what road I will take.
As of now i kept the peace and mental health of them. I think I made a wise decision !

As of my wife, it will always be in her consciousness. Im the better man and Karma has to deal with her.
When Karma comes, then she can’t say anything for something she did


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You are more of a man than I.
Thats something I would go to prison over if I caught them in the act. Tyrone would never use his dick again, if it happened in my home.

[German89]

I was cheated on as well. I left him. Never taking him back.

I would ask your step daughter what she wants. If youre staying with your wife then, you need to either let it go or move on. If you cant. Time to reconsider your marriage or, go to therapy.

ETA. Do not stay in a relationship for the children. Thats such a out dated excuse.

[BG]

A child does not have to be biologically yours for you to love them like your own. Sounds to me like your raised her and she is your daughter. I have two kids, not mine biologically, and I never call them step kids unless someone asks (we have different last names). I would go and make it a very special day for YOUR daughter and make that POS fell like crap for not being the father that he should have been. He will always be her "dad" but your her Father. Who cares if he and her mother are going to be unconfortable, good they should be. Just ignor it and do everything to make it the best day for your daughter.

I have been in this type of situation several times and I can tell you this. In the years to come, you will either will be saying "I wish I would have gone or I am glad I did". Be glad you did.

WELL SAID and glad to see you!

[BigPimpin76]

I was cheated on as well. I left him. Never taking him back.

I would ask your step daughter what she wants. If youre staying with your wife then, you need to either let it go or move on. If you cant. Time to reconsider your marriage or, go to therapy.

ETA. Do not stay in a relationship for the children. Thats such a out dated excuse.

Thanks but nothing has been ever outdated. Time repeats itself for humanity. We know that time existed for over more than 6000 years and we are still digging to find the truth, is it outdated?
I did let it go, im still with her and doing my best at it. Nothing more than self healing, more than a therapy!


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[BG]

Little bit of advice........dont drink!!

[Obs]

I was cheated on as well. I left him. Never taking him back.

I would ask your step daughter what she wants. If youre staying with your wife then, you need to either let it go or move on. If you cant. Time to reconsider your marriage or, go to therapy.

ETA. Do not stay in a relationship for the children. Thats such a out dated excuse.

There was no decision or time thought about it for me. I will never be second pick. I would rather die alone. Thats all I ask for is the courtesy of letting me lnow so I don't have to waste anymore time on the pos in question.

Lots of people want to have their cake and eat it too.
They can choke on their fucking cake and die.
Forgiveness hasn't got one damn thing to do with consequences. Everyone must reap their own consequences.

For the kids is bullshit. I won't watch my kids get fucked around on and stay with a pos that only cares about their own desires. No way I will teach them thats an ok thing to do.

This is why marriage is a goddamn joke now.
A vow is just something people "feel at the time"when they decide different there is no real consequence.
Fucking divorce seems to require more of a spine than marriage. It's backwards just like every other thing in this world.

[German89]

There was no decision or time thought about it for me. I will never be second pick. I would rather die alone. Thats all I ask for is the courtesy of letting me lnow so I don't have to waste anymore time on the pos in question.

Lots of people want to have their cake and eat it too.
They can choke on their fucking cake and die.
Forgiveness hasn't got one damn thing to do with consequences. Everyone must reap their own consequences.

For the kids is bullshit. I won't watch my kids get fucked around on and stay with a pos that only cares about their own desires. No way I will teach them thats an ok thing to do.

This is why marriage is a goddamn joke now.
A vow is just something people "feel at the time"when they decide different there is no real consequence.
Fucking divorce seems to require more of a spine than marriage. It's backwards just like every other thing in this world.

Im right with you on everything you say born.

Hence why, i cant be with him for my son. I will not teach my son how to "live with" someone who is toxic.

And yes, @bigpimpin76, staying with someone for the kids, is out dated. Super outdated. Therapy is part of heeling. If you think therapy is a joke. I dont dont know what to tell you then... i dont even know what your OP was about. Go to the graduation. His presence only bugs you because, you feel second best to her. Youre supressing something.

[BigPimpin76]

There was no decision or time thought about it for me. I will never be second pick. I would rather die alone. Thats all I ask for is the courtesy of letting me lnow so I don't have to waste anymore time on the pos in question.

Lots of people want to have their cake and eat it too.
They can choke on their fucking cake and die.
Forgiveness hasn't got one damn thing to do with consequences. Everyone must reap their own consequences.

For the kids is bullshit. I won't watch my kids get fucked around on and stay with a pos that only cares about their own desires. No way I will teach them thats an ok thing to do.

This is why marriage is a goddamn joke now.
A vow is just something people "feel at the time"when they decide different there is no real consequence.
Fucking divorce seems to require more of a spine than marriage. It's backwards just like every other thing in this world.

Yes the Laws of the Elite are bullshit!!!!
Complete bullshit! They were created for caos!!
Im glad you are awake on this topic!
I am with you on this one, but I believe in Karma, not in my personal justice.


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[BigPimpin76]

Im right with you on everything you say born.

Hence why, i cant be with him for my son. I will not teach my son how to "live with" someone who is toxic.

And yes, @bigpimpin76, staying with someone for the kids, is out dated. Super outdated. Therapy is part of heeling. If you think therapy is a joke. I dont dont know what to tell you then... i dont even know what your OP was about. Go to the graduation. His presence only bugs you because, you feel second best to her. Youre supressing something.

Im here as we speak my man



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[Capebuffalo]

Im here as we speak my man

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Good for you

[BigPimpin76]

Good for you

Numbers tell me that it was done right. Sincronicity



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[< <Samson> >]

Read the 1st


I couldn't do it - nor accept it, so I have no other input





It would eat at my core slowly - I'd have no resolution

[German89]

Im here as we speak my man



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Women!

But good. Glad you went.

Hopefully you enjoyed your time