This Will Be My last Post

[< <Samson> >]

How do those two taste together?

To me? Good - but, I’m weird

[Madcox]

Glad to see you are doing well Brother!!! Nothing like beet juice to open up your blood vessels! Keep on keeping on Bro!

[< <Samson> >]

^ can anyone delete this bull shit along with those fake ass accounts?

[< <Samson> >]

I didn’t have the time to type this up yesterday. But, yesterday was 9 weeks since this shit was complete - today I am into week 10

Physically, shit - I feel fine. For the most part - everything visible is healed - only thing suckin is my neck pops/cracks like a motherfucker - it always did tho. Seems a bit more noticeable now. Haven’t taken any pain meds for a quite a long time now - can’t even remember how long.

Stopped smoking completely - well, I had two smokes with the guy who saved my life about a week ago & that’s it - so 2 or so, in 3 weeks

Sleep is getting better, I have fallen asleep without meds now a handful of times - when I get physically tired. Sleep schedule is still off wack, but, I kinda prefer it this way - I’ll fall sleep by 7:30 & wake up at 3 or so

Still have a little noise in my left ear, but I’m quite used to it now - it’s not noticeable at all unless I’m in a quiet room

Pressure from the inside the cranium seems to be much more tolerable & comes/goes - but, at times I can feel exactly where this bastard is inside - but, it’s no pain - I think of it as reminder of mortality

Started a little more juice - about 300mg a week of mast prop + 400mg of test(test e & prop)

Strength is def there & it’s hard to hold off from using it - lifting max of 15 Lbs is getting quite old. . . Got real handsy & picked up a 5 gallon water jug for just a second - felt fine, put it down just in case - shit, I’m used to curling these

Blood pressure is nice & stable now - with meds + beet juice & celery here & there, my BP is as low as it was before I touched roids or grew - 130/70 or so

Weight is still at a solid 211 - been on the mast for a week & can def feel a little kick from that

I’m not starting or upping anything else for now, not until I can lift real weights or decide to take the leap & just go back to the face masked up gym


And, yup - it’s still 2020

[charger69]

It’s still 2020, but winding down. I will probably stay up until 12 am on dec 31 to ensure that this year leaves us.
I have had more operations this year than I have had in all my life.

On a good note, your progress is remarkable. I remember seeing your supposed last post and thinking WTF. I never thought that I would still be communicating with you.
I guess it’s a wake up call to all of us as to how fragile life can be. We take it for granted way too much.
With that being said, you behave and stop lifting this buckets!! I also know that you are probably flirting with the nurses every chance you get so my recommendation..... Keep it up!!! LOL


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[Test Monsterone]

good to see you're improving steadily.

Do you have any exercise bands? I find they give me a great pump and the tension is gradual, as opposed to straight heavy dumbells. You can kind of adjust the tension by shortening the band, stepping wider on the band/etc, which I believe would be a good addition. It's more than just a pump, though, I actually get a good workout with bands.

I'm sure quitting cigarettes has had a positive impact on your cardio and bp. My blood pressure/systolic rarely reaches the 140s+ nowadays unless I'm smoking cigs and drinking too much coffee(which for me is more than 1 cup a day). You know how I feel about running shit right now, but it's your choice, and at least you're doing everything else right. I wish you good luck bro.

[< <Samson> >]

Nurses < LoL. . . I haven’t mentioned this since I been so all over the place here lately. But, if all the planets align & what not - I am considering going into nursing myself. It’s an idea I stole from my wife & after this ordeal - well, I have a pretty interesting insight to say the least.

I cracked into her books here a few days ago - and, well - she don’t seem to like it much - quite the opposite of what I expected. But - - - oh, well




I def have a ways to go, since I have to change over all of my classes - but, I already have all the basics(English, math, physiology) - but, yeah - I said this to myself when I was getting out of the hospital - if I can, I will

Fingers crossed here - since this “thing” in my head really has no guarantees - but, what does really?!

Hmmmm, maybe I’ll look into this resistance band idea - I never like em much before tho

But, yeah - sorry, body - I’m addicted to roids & looking good

So far, my body seems to be okay with me - actually seems better in a few ways


My son was playing mortal kombat & seen robocop - he’s like wtf is that - shit, then he sat and watched all 4 movies with me - shit, I feel like I achieved something. Getting him to watch 80’s - 90’s movies is unheard of + he said he liked the old ones(1 & 2) and not the new remake - 3 is ehh

But, yeah - I feel like RoboCop looks - stiff af, but running like a machine



Shit, he calls me Murphy rn - thx, I think

[Test Monsterone]

Yeah man, give the bands a try. I have the ones that detach from the handle, so I can attach as many together as I like. The ones permanently fixed to the handles suck for the most part. I got this thing at the beginning of the pandemic:

https://www.amazon.com/Resistance-Ba.../dp/B0825FR91L


It's a rail that attached to a vertical stud. About 20 long screws hold it in. Very solid. You can move the hook up and down on the wall about 6 ft, allowing for almost any exercise. I'm telling you, I weigh 245 and I get a good workout with this. All mind-muscle shit. Great pumps.


I hear you on the addiction lol. I got a semi-bad valve in my heart and BP problems since a teen, so maybe I shouldn't be talking.


That's awesome that you're thinking about going into the medical field. I wanted to in the past but just wasn't in the right state of mind at the time. Now I'm in business, but there is an element of humanity and realness missing. I know Quester is in the medical field also, along with a few other guys on here. Rewarding jobs, they must be.

[< <Samson> >]

10 weeks have passed

I just started doing pushups this week - still no gym yet

But, I have been doing sets of 25 for 150-200 total per day for the last 3(maybe 4 days)


Head feels good, but some oddities are still present - wooshing sound, odd momentary type pains shooting around the left side of my head - but, this shit is very very minor

It's actually a lot better than what I was living with for a long time - still no headaches & we're in the sun all day since work kinda sorta picked back up - I was thinking about this - I got so accustomed to having harsh headaches that I constantly carried some sort of a pain reliever(Tylenol or ibuprofen) - still no post heat headache, not even one. . . I get nauseous a bit some times, but not ache at all - I'd have a pushing type pain in my right eye - nothin, all gone


Not much else to add, still off the smokes, all drugs aside from weed & roids. . . Still a little xAnax for sleep, but I have been doing really well with that shit by my standards - I miss a few days a week when I actually wear down & on days I do take it, I'm down to .5mg or so


Weed smoking is at a all time low since the procedure was done - since I feel sane on my own now. . . Still drinking too much imo, back to my usual 3-5 shots a night 5x a week or so


My BP is never above 140/80 ever - Usually stays under 130/70 < give or take a few points



And, it's still 2020 - No idea where anything will go at this point - fingers crossed

[wango]

Best of luck with everything. Continued improvement.

[Zodiac82]

This is good to hear things are better man. Just dropped in to peak around a little bit and saw your initial post. Keep getting better man. Been a while since I've been active on the board so you might not remember me. All good . Lol..take care

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[KennyJ]

Samson, my goodness man I saw the first post of this thread and was like OMG. I’ve been away for a few months and I haven’t read the whole thread but I see you must have recovered. Man I’m so happy you’re ok and best wishes to you.

[< <Samson> >]

^ yeah, recovered my ass

Last Friday was my 40th birthday - I still haven’t recovered. I don’t know what caused what, but I been pretty rough for almost a week - feels like I felt a month post procedure, which is def a fairly large set back

[almostgone]

^ yeah, recovered my ass

Last Friday was my 40th birthday - I still haven’t recovered. I don’t know what caused what, but I been pretty rough for almost a week - feels like I felt a month post procedure, which is def a fairly large set back

#1. Excellent job staying away from the cigs .
#2. Did you do anything different Friday in regards to celebrating your b'day?
#3. It sounds great that you're knocking out the pushups with minor discomfort. Are you cleared for that much activity or would your Dr/treatment team have a shit fit if they knew?
#4. Congrats on the bday! I hit 56 years old this past Monday myself.

[charger69]

#1. Excellent job staying away from the cigs .
#2. Did you do anything different Friday in regards to celebrating your b'day?
#3. It sounds great that you're knocking out the pushups with minor discomfort. Are you cleared for that much activity or would your Dr/treatment team have a shit fit if they knew?
#4. Congrats on the bday! I hit 56 years old this past Monday myself.

Come on AG!!! My bet is Dr would have a shit fit. LOL
Happy belated birthday.:::::: you old goat! It’s nice having someone older than you so you can say those things! LOL


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[Test Monsterone]

^ yeah, recovered my ass

Last Friday was my 40th birthday - I still haven’t recovered. I don’t know what caused what, but I been pretty rough for almost a week - feels like I felt a month post procedure, which is def a fairly large set back

Could it be anything you're currently running? How's the BP?

[< <Samson> >]

By my old standards, I took it easy

I don’t know how exactly, but I am damn certain it was the magic mushrooms

Well, that & drinking about a 1/2 gallon of vodka & staying in the hot tub all night

Fuck - it’s been a week & I’m finally starting to feel sane

Didn’t do anything else at all aside from smoking a pack of cigarettes

^ not taking it easy huh

This has been my feeling for a solid first 3 days after





Shit, and MD would shit themselves if they knew what I was on & how much - they don’t approve of roids much either

[almostgone]

By my old standards, I took it easy

I don’t know how exactly, but I am damn certain it was the magic mushrooms

Well, that & drinking about a 1/2 gallon of vodka & staying in the hot tub all night

Fuck - it’s been a week & I’m finally starting to feel sane

Didn’t do anything else at all aside from smoking a pack of cigarettes

^ not taking it easy huh

This has been my feeling for a solid first 3 days after





Shit, and MD would shit themselves if they knew what I was on & how much - they don’t approve of roids much either

Well, that probably explains at least part of your feeling drained and run down.

That's a decent amount of vodka and shrooms are hell on me....well, they were 30 years ago, but I bet they still would be.

Not trying to be nosy, but what kind of physical limitations do they want you to follow right now?

Cigs are a tough one. When I quit I pretty much switched one habit for another. I chew gum like a madman.

[< <Samson> >]

This will be week 12 post embo procedure - no restrictions(said my billy bad ass 32 neurosurgeon)

So, def taking it easier - for life

Got my big weights back - just curled 50’s for the first time in over 3 months. . . Daum, these are heavy < I use to rep this how many times?

Anyway

I feel stellar now - magic mushrooms

I never really enjoyed psychedelics much + being this run down that day

But, a week to recover - screw that, I’m just not getting that fucked up any more - it’s just not worth the possibility of consequences



As of right now & the last couple of days I feel the best that I have since my intracranial explosion back in Lake Havasu

I’d like to keep this feeling going as long as possible

[charger69]

Well, that probably explains at least part of your feeling drained and run down.

That's a decent amount of vodka and shrooms are hell on me....well, they were 30 years ago, but I bet they still would be.

Not trying to be nosy, but what kind of physical limitations do they want you to follow right now?

Cigs are a tough one. When I quit I pretty much switched one habit for another. I chew gum like a madman.

I quit chewing tobacco and started sunflower seeds. I was able to quit those too. LOL
25 years chewing tobacco was a bear to quit. I was over a can a day. Expensive habit.
I had a nightmare that I had throat cancer and quit cold turkey the next day.


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[< <Samson> >]

I suppose I should update this - I was holding out to really see how I feel - it’s been a few days shy of four months

Whatever I feel now, I call it normal - I try my best not to overthink it at this point.

I’m lifting full weight - well, whatever weights I could get my hands on - I set up a half assed gym in the house - dumbbells up to 57.5 pounds that I can rep 25 times on the incline like nothing & still curl a few times

I was gonna go back to the gym - but, I’m still giving it more time - getting Corona’d up would still suck

Of course, I got on more juice - just bumped my Var to 50mg a day, along with 150mg of Deca , 200mg of Mast Prop, 200mg Test Prop & 120mg a week of Test E


I don’t handle stimulants well now, ran some EC for a week - my BP jumped over 140/80. . . Got, back off - dropped right back down into mid 120’s/high 60’s - low 70’s

Cut the booze, picked up smoking I don’t smoke much & I feel like I will give it up one of these packs + lotts of weed. . . My anxiety has really been sucking, I can’t even tell why - but, I require either more xAnax or weed eatables. I’m still getting close to 8 hours of sleep though

Considering - I feel like I’m doing A ok. . . Considering what I still deal with & too be this intact after such an event is nothing short of a miracle - I always said I wanted to see one. Well, be careful what you wish for I suppose


Oh, yeah - I still look awesome. It’s amazing that I have kept up throughout all of this & not having gym access - still trying to lose a few more pounds before I gain them back from thanksgiving

[Fluidic Kimbo]

I'm smoking at the moment, but I'm smoking a brand of cigarettes that has less than 10% the tar and nicotine of a normal cigarette -- so I figure that smoking a 20-pack of these is like smoking 2 or 3 normal cigarettes.

I don't know if you're near Phoenix, and I'm not saying that you should become a Buddhist or anything, but here's some meditation groups/classes that might be useful:

https://www.eventbrite.com/d/az--pho...ation-classes/

[< <Samson> >]

Update of the continuation of this hellish year;

Fresh back out of ER - again. Completely different issue, gallbladder stone(s). Wake up 2 days ago with a feeling of getting stabbed under the right rib cage. I puked & had the runs for about 30 hours or so - had to go in, it felt so bad. By the time I was back on a morphine & Zofran drip they passed

Man, this year can eat shit. Prob now, is that what happened in this useless year will not just stay in 2020

Head - feels at a solid 95%+. . . But, I do feel a tad slower. Which in my case, isn’t really a bad thing - I just seem quite a bit more cautious & a bit more rational

Anyone have any suggestions on getting gallstones to not form again would be great - otherwise, I’ll need to do gallbladder flushes more often < yes, just as fun as it sounds


And, I mean really - fuck this year. For fuck sakes the good hospital I go to now had to make a outside waiting room. . .

[The Deadlifting Dog]

Please stop creating multiple accounts and posting the same request.

[< <Samson> >]

^ anyone

Feel free to delete that basura

[Mooseman33]

year cant end fast enough for you Samson.

stay strong brotha, you are doing great.

feel better

[almostgone]

Please stop creating multiple accounts and posting the same request.

^ anyone

Feel free to delete that basura

Sorry for that, guys. We had to do a little housecleaning. We usually catch the majority of those when they're inbound, but a few of those always manage to crash the party.

[clarky.]

Update of the continuation of this hellish year;

Fresh back out of ER - again. Completely different issue, gallbladder stone(s). Wake up 2 days ago with a feeling of getting stabbed under the right rib cage. I puked & had the runs for about 30 hours or so - had to go in, it felt so bad. By the time I was back on a morphine & Zofran drip they passed

Man, this year can eat shit. Prob now, is that what happened in this useless year will not just stay in 2020

Head - feels at a solid 95%+. . . But, I do feel a tad slower. Which in my case, isn’t really a bad thing - I just seem quite a bit more cautious & a bit more rational

Anyone have any suggestions on getting gallstones to not form again would be great - otherwise, I’ll need to do gallbladder flushes more often < yes, just as fun as it sounds


And, I mean really - fuck this year. For fuck sakes the good hospital I go to now had to make a outside waiting room. . .

Ffs Samson, one thing after another. Look forward to the new year. New start fuck 2020.

[< <Samson> >]

Today marks exactly 5 months since I nearly dropped dead - My head seems aight now, the constant drone in my left ear is gone. My BP is stabilized back to pre - hemorrhage times(even without meds).


Now, I get to enjoy a low res diet until my guts feel like they are back in my body



It's been about a month since I completely put the smokes down & a week for booze - although, after this last Tuesday's episode - I'm thinking it'll be a while before I start drinking again(I wish I got a Dollar for every time I said this)


Shit, now weed being fully legal & all - I'm set. . . . Although it does make me ridiculously hungry at times




This year has sure changed my outlook on just about everything. Everyone around me - well, it's like nothing even happened. . . . I guess that's just how "we" are - Just look the other way, as long as it isn't ourselves.


And, the shit I see people doing - like, you can't be serious. . . Yes, yes they are. That includes myself prior to all of this - Like, come on - I should of known better. . . . . But, I guess not


Do now


I would say fuck this year, like always - but, this 2020 whatever it was is going to stay for life - what happened in 2020 isn't just going to stay in 2020

[lovbyts]

#1. Excellent job staying away from the cigs .
#2. Did you do anything different Friday in regards to celebrating your b'day?
#3. It sounds great that you're knocking out the pushups with minor discomfort. Are you cleared for that much activity or would your Dr/treatment team have a shit fit if they knew?
#4. Congrats on the bday! I hit 56 years old this past Monday myself.

Damn you guys are old. I figure if I average my age vs my wife Im only 35. lol

Glad you are still on the mend Samson and keep up the good work. I hope to get back into a healthier lifestyle after my shoulder replacement Jan 31st, 2020. Keep us informed of the progress.

[Test Monsterone]

It's been about a month since I completely put the smokes down & a week for booze - although, after this last Tuesday's episode - I'm thinking it'll be a while before I start drinking again(I wish I got a Dollar for every time I said this)


Shit, now weed being fully legal & all - I'm set. . . . Although it does make me ridiculously hungry at times

Awesome to see you're doing well and trying to live a clean life. Do you find the alcohol made it harder to quit cigarettes? For me they go hand-in-hand almost. I drink once a week cause my girl likes to have wine, but I could go a year without a sip. A bag of weed is all I need.

[< <Samson> >]

No, surprisingly booze doesn't make me wanna smoke more - more like social smoking situations. I dropped the smokes for good now - no need to pick that back up


Picked up the booze(again) - not a lot - but, that not a lot turns into a Russian not a lot real fast


But, I'm done sitting - Back at the gym today for the first time since the beginning of march of this year of insanity.

Drank beet juice blended with celery as a preworkout < never thought I'd see the day

I'm right over five months out now - I'm glad I waited and just got some junior weights at home for the last 2 months(before that, I was lifting 10Lb weights for hours each day) - even though my neurosurgeon said, hit it at three months - he was a bit standoffish about it - maybe, not "your" usual


Pushed 80% of my usual weight - FUCK!!!! There is no physical way to describe what I feel inside my cranium - but, I call it manageable


I'm not stopping until I drop again - life is too short. I'm doing this for every day that I wont be able to & everyone who can't do it today. I was just reading another guy's story in my group - somewhat similar situation to mine including the hemorrhage - it took him over two years to learn to walk again < this shit is tough to swallow for me. . . .My case is quite rare - But, now I have met a few survivors of similar conditions < There aren't many & my recovery time has still been the shortest of any other case that I have heard.


Guts stopped hurting(mostly) - I'm sticking to my new diet - I actually dropped most cholesterol rich foods & I'm thinking now - I'll need to consider a gallbladder flush a regular thing. I'm thinking every 3-6 months, it works - but, surely doesn't feel great


But, dang - it felt good to walk through the gym doors. . . . We all take these things for granted - until it just vanishes. I sure feel it now - fuck, it's hard to put into words

But, I'm pretty sure there a few members on here that totally get it - man, this year - what a way to ring in being 40

[wango]

Had this on Friday Samson. The wife made a real hearty borscht with a base of short rib and short rib bones (bones then removed). I thickened it up a little more by breaking up the bread and letting it soak. And damn, I’m glad the wife convinced me to have the sour cream, heck yeah!

Honestly took a pic, because I thought you might appreciate it. You’ve had one hell of a year from what I’ve read and am very happy you are alive and getting back at the gym. Happy holidays to you!

[< <Samson> >]

Had this on Friday Samson. The wife made a real hearty borscht with a base of short rib and short rib bones (bones then removed). I thickened it up a little more by breaking up the bread and letting it soak. And damn, I’m glad the wife convinced me to have the sour cream, heck yeah!

Honestly took a pic, because I thought you might appreciate it. You’ve had one hell of a year from what I’ve read and am very happy you are alive and getting back at the gym. Happy holidays to you!

My bad, I forgot to post back

Gawd, I hate borscht - weird ass beet soup shit

My parents made that & onion soup all the time < that whole starvation thing was still strong until my parents & I fled the country

Only things that I stick to still(and try my best to limit) are smoked/brined fish + caviar. . . I’m bad with that stuff, I can eat it all day - I think it’s officially a food that is way worse than fast food.

[wango]

My bad, I forgot to post back

Gawd, I hate borscht - weird ass beet soup shit

My parents made that & onion soup all the time < that whole starvation thing was still strong until my parents & I fled the country

Only things that I stick to still(and try my best to limit) are smoked/brined fish + caviar. . . I’m bad with that stuff, I can eat it all day - I think it’s officially a food that is way worse than fast food.

Damn, sorry bout a pic of food you hate. I don’t like the cold and thin stuff, but this was heavy with short rib, cabbage, potatoes & some onion;almost like a stew. Diminished the beet taste quite a bit.

I do love me some caviar . . . . . and icy cold vodka!

Merry Christmas!

[< <Samson> >]

Damn, sorry bout a pic of food you hate. I don’t like the cold and thin stuff, but this was heavy with short rib, cabbage, potatoes & some onion;almost like a stew. Diminished the beet taste quite a bit.

I do love me some caviar . . . . . and icy cold vodka!

Merry Christmas!

Oh, I don’t mind & actually like the beet taste - I drink straight beet juice

Just something about that runny odd taste + my mom use to put sour cream in that shit < that’s just weird

And - merry Christmas either way man!


I need some black caviar < haven’t had that stuff in almost 2 decades. . . The red is what’s mostly sold nower days

[wango]

Oh, I don’t mind & actually like the beet taste - I drink straight beet juice

Just something about that runny odd taste + my mom use to put sour cream in that shit < that’s just weird

And - merry Christmas either way man!


I need some black caviar < haven’t had that stuff in almost 2 decades. . . The red is what’s mostly sold nower days

Agree about beet juice.

Also hear ya on certain things my mother made from childhood that just didn’t work for me. All this time later, if I think about it I can still taste it and it’s not pleasant.

[< <Samson> >]

Thought I’d update this a bit,

I’m done with all the political, COVID & any other man generated BS - GL, to us all

Shit, I feel fucking amazing - still haven’t picked up a cigarette, started drinking more & more again - fucking Vodka - Nothing negative from it, and that’s what kinda gets me drinking more

I’m starting to pile on the roids, now on deca , sust, var, proviron & now winni - all at 20mg per day - if I manage to pull my booze long enough, all double all doses

I’m straight breaking my own PR’s - it just seems so unreal at times + I feel better than I did a year ago. My vision, no headaches, no odd feelings - no spinal fluid shooting out of my nose & I’m repping 315 pound deadlifts

Even my weight is climbing - in a good way. . . I’m darn near pushing 225 Lbs



My BP seems to be staying stable, but I am still on my BP meds



Talk about miraculous luck, I wouldn’t trade this shit in for a PowerBall ticket

Although, I am considering getting these man tits reworked - but, so far - they haven’t ached at all - even on the proviron that made them throb before

[Cuz]

Thought I’d update this a bit,

I’m done with all the political, COVID & any other man generated BS - GL, to us all

Shit, I feel fucking amazing - still haven’t picked up a cigarette, started drinking more & more again - fucking Vodka - Nothing negative from it, and that’s what kinda gets me drinking more

I’m starting to pile on the roids, now on deca , sust, var, proviron & now winni - all at 20mg per day - if I manage to pull my booze long enough, all double all doses

I’m straight breaking my own PR’s - it just seems so unreal at times + I feel better than I did a year ago. My vision, no headaches, no odd feelings - no spinal fluid shooting out of my nose & I’m repping 315 pound deadlifts

Even my weight is climbing - in a good way. . . I’m darn near pushing 225 Lbs



My BP seems to be staying stable, but I am still on my BP meds



Talk about miraculous luck, I wouldn’t trade this shit in for a PowerBall ticket

Although, I am considering getting these man tits reworked - but, so far - they haven’t ached at all - even on the proviron that made them throb before

Wonderful news bro

[< <Samson> >]

^ wow

Lol

I had to click the link - shit, I can actually read the site

That’s weird