that you decided you needed to be a better person? (if you have lol)
That is if you have ever had that experience. I know many here have, just wondered what changed.
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that you decided you needed to be a better person? (if you have lol)
That is if you have ever had that experience. I know many here have, just wondered what changed.
Well, this dying thing - I guess. . . But, that’s mostly due to the fact that I really feel like my days have been drastically cut
But, I do feel like I have really tried my best to a point - best with what knowledge I had at the moment
Could have I done better - sure. . . But, I feel extremely lucky to not be regretful for anything so far. I felt that shit when I thought my minutes were numbered - fuck, it’s been a good ride
Yeah when my children were born..
Was a bit of a nightmare when I was younger,got up to a lot of dodgy things...
Football related fighting and other nasty stuff..
Kids came along and I had to re-evaluate my life....
Unfortunately I was 37, about to get divorced, start juicing hard and just bounce at clubs. I was tired of my life, very unhappy. Then a friend got me started in church and after some hard lessons I was blessed with a second chance at life. I try everyday to better myself somehow, big or small.
i was about 33, doing well, self employed making big $ and spending it all on coke...i was neglecting my wife when one day and a voice in my head reminded me of the pact i made with god if he would bring her back into my life when she was gone away to collage...well my prayers where answered, life was great and so was the coke, this went on for about 3 yrs...then one day while on a bender i realized i was about to throw everything i hold dear to me away so i quit the scene cold turkey and never looked back...was the most liberating day of my life freeing my self from addiction...
Funny, how ya'll bring up drug use/abuse as a negative
I don't, I don't take it back - those times are not replaceable & were worth all the effort. I wanted to do it all & see it all - I pretty much did. . . . I knew this go fast life would catch up to me - I could of never predicted from where. . . . Prob that I am having now, it was too good to wanna let go
Don’t get me wrong they where good times but it was time to grow up for me...but your right if you mean all those experiences made me who I am today...Quote:
Originally Posted by <> 
If it wasn’t for drugs there’s no way I’d cover the ground that I have. From the money, the people the situations, etc. But, in the last few years more than half of the people around me died - every death & prison sentence was drug related. I started to realize some shit - but, still didn’t stop, but did get more cautious - just started to feel like I had a hang on things & this happened
Maybe everything does happen for a reason. . . I clearly see it, this was just a tough slap aside the head for me to come to this conclusion.
When I was a teen, into my early 20's I got into the usual bullshit. I've been a pretty decent person in the last decade or so. I have some anger issues and I would fight a lot with my ex, but she had severe emotional problems. I learned over time to be calmer and understand her mental issues. I am no longer with her, but the last two days I spent over an hour each day talking her through some stuff she's dealing with... only to have her disrespect me and my new gf today and say all kinds of ignorant shit. I know it's her mental issue that is making her do this and I know she will suffer from it and feel guilty by tomorrow. It wasn't any one day that made me a better person, it was the cumulative experiences and maturity gained through time.
I still have more to grow. I isolate myself from my family a lot. My 87 yo grandmother emailed me 3 days ago and I still haven't responded. I don't know why, but I get anxious about family. I keep putting off going to see my parents, and they live only 10 min away. I just like to keep to myself and not be bothered I guess... that is something I need to work on. I need to be more involved with my family, but I wish they would understand that I sometimes need 2 weeks of no contact to reset myself.
I see an opportunity every single day. I got so into it I evolved my perfectionism into a Type-A personality. Now I'm working on that.
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True story: I was in church praying for patience and understanding for others while they were doing the rosary before the priest started. A lady came up to me and leaned into within three inches of my face and asked me, in a whisper, my name and phone number for contact tracing. I got so irritated I left before the ceremony started. (Yes, I'm Catholic but no, I don't remember all the different names of the ceremony and stuff. I went through RCIA 7 years ago and my preacher was a philosophy major prior to seminary. I got every question answered well enough to stick around.) I'm going back tomorrow with my contact info on an index card.
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Anyhow, I don't think I possessed the willpower for self-change until I had a few hard breaks and unfair turns back around 2010. Before then, I just wanted it, before that, I just figured I deserved it and it was gonna happen one day, before that I smoked a lot of pot.
Quote:
Originally Posted by <>
I'm very thankful you are here to share with us.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Booz
Same here. Son being born.
I like to think that I've always been at the root a good person. I didn't always make the right choices (and I still don't), but I've always tried to do good. I've learned over the years to not be as nice and giving as I'd like to be. People take advantage of other people's generosity.
Admin, how about you?
Thank you for asking.Quote:
Originally Posted by Quester
I believe that I have always tried to be a good person... I do not react on a whim and always try to think before I speak which has gotten me in to trouble before. haha people mistaken it for not wanting to join in but I am not a rude person in the least, so I try to be honest to a fault and word things to not harm anyone if possible... kind of like the old adage "if you can not say something nice then do not say anything lol.
But, I reevaluated my life as others above with each child we added biologically and adopted into our family, striving to be better and to be here to show them the right way to grow into good adults.
so that is more information in one post than anyone on here has ever known about me as a human.
Thank you for sharing brother...
Fatherhood for sure, but after getting sick this spring I had this epiphany that I wanted to be remembered for the good and not the reactive nonsense.
Like you all, I’ve always considered myself kind and thoughtful but certainly prone to emotion and explosiveness.
After coming to terms with my mortality and the fact that despite what I thought was my health and strength, I’ve worked hard at growing and being more understanding and compassionate of others in hopes that I’ll somehow be a better person by inspiring others to be better people
When the man of my dreams told me about myself.
Made changes the very next day.
Good ones too.
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Originally Posted by *Admin*
Human?