Whats the divorce rate up to???

[monster.]

I hear its higher then 60%!!!! Can you believe our generation!!!! Does anyone plan on getting married in here, or is married, and do you think about that? That sounds like a silly question but If you can picture it 60%, that's 10 couples you know 6 of which will end up divorcing eachother?? LOLLLL My parents were the first in my neighborhood to get divorced.. It wasn't shocking or anything, my dad was having an affair while my mother was raising us, I've grown to accept it.. The more i think about it, the more it bothers me.. Does this bother anyone else, the divorce rate being so high? whats the point of getting married?

How do you guys feel about this sh!t.. It's a big deal, if you plan on tieing the knot one day.. Females you respond too, and people that are married, so we get crossfire here.. Is love that blind? There is no right answer, but what makes people want leave eachother so much lately..

absolutely ridiculous subject!!!!!!!!!!!!

[thegorilla]

Here's my take on the marriage rate.

It has to be 50% and no more. Do you know why ? Becasue half the marriages end in divorce and the other half end in death.

TheInfamousApe

TheGorilla

[spywizard]

I'm not sure the current or last generation knows how to stay in a long term relationship.. it has become too common place... and acceptable..

My parents, and grandparents.........all divorced......

What do ya know..............

[monster.]

Haha... I wish it that was the truth, It may be conflicting information, but I heard its higher then 60%, that end up divorcing... Thats fuking sick!!! Whats the point of spending 40 grand on a wedding, when your going to pay that to lawyers to settle the divorce, then ultimately lose half of what you have in 3 years or so?...

LOLLLLLLLL

[ttuPrincess]

I think the divorce rate being so high is due to the fact that people are getting married at such a young age and not really looking at what might happen down the road. In a world like the one we live in today many people marry to get out of situations they are in thinking that marriage is going to make their life so much better, only to realize a few years later that its not better, but infact worse.

I plan on getting married.... and I hope its to the one I am with now, but I don't forsee it anytime in the near near future. I want to live with this person before hand for atleast a year, if not more, and also I would like a long engagement, not because I want the chance to back out, but because I want to be sure that he is "THE ONE."
A lot of people dont do this, Im not saying that my way is the "Right Way." Some people get married after knowing someone for a few months and it does end up working out. They take a chance and they are very lucky, but many are not.

Another thing is that many young couples see divorce as a way out of a problem with their significant other, when the problem really could be worked out....if they would just stay and talk out the problem there might not be a need for divorce.

People also need to think about marriage when they have children.... My parents tried to get remarried after I was born and all I remember is them fighting.. that is no way for a child to be brought up... DO NOT get married because you have a child....stay friends and raise the child with 2 loving parents, not parents who tried to be married and hate each other in the end.

In answer to your last question... Yes, love is blind, but marriage is not... it should be faced with open eyes, open hearts and most importantly, open minds!!!

[thegorilla]

Once your married your married.

a marriage ends in 1 of 2 ways :

1.divorce
2.death

THERFORE, 50% of all marriages in in divorce.

TG

Haha... I wish it that was the truth, It may be conflicting information, but I heard its higher then 60%, that end up divorcing... Thats fuking sick!!! Whats the point of spending 40 grand on a wedding, when your going to pay that to lawyers to settle the divorce, then ultimately lose half of what you have in 3 years or so?...

LOLLLLLLLL

[monster.]

You have a few good points ttuPrincess.. I agree with spywizard too, some people i see are too imature to get married, and would not be capable of having a long term relationship.. I think, It ultimately depends on the both people having/wanting the same things in their future.. Times change, everyone has different goals, make a million, start their own company; i could see how selfishness could play a part too..

[monster.]

Once your married your married.

a marriage ends in 1 of 2 ways :

1.divorce
2.death

THERFORE, 50% of all marriages in in divorce.

TG

thank you

[ttuPrincess]

Once your married your married.

a marriage ends in 1 of 2 ways :

1.divorce
2.death

THERFORE, 50% of all marriages in in divorce.

TG

Yes but you can be married more than once, so if people are divorced and then remarried they make the divorce rate go up because they have one or more marriages ending by divorce and one ending by death ( or if they become widowed more than one ending by death)

[monster.]

Yes but you can be married more than once, so if people are divorced and then remarried they make the divorce rate go up because they have one or more marriages ending by divorce and one ending by death ( or if they become widowed more than one ending by death)

Thats what i'm saying!!!!! It's ridiculous..

[ttuPrincess]

If your selfish enough not to support the one you said "till death do us part" to when they want to better themself by IE. making more money, getting in shape, or any other way that does not effect you in a harmful way, then I feel you deserve to be alone for the rest of your life, or with somene who does not care about your feelings either..... but that kind of person Im talking about could be my roommate to a "T"

[bermich]

Marriage has different meanings to people now adays. Its too easy to get into and out of a marriage. Me personally: I think it is a good thing. I dont think a judge should make people stay together if they dont want to. Just because they got married does not mean they should stay together. Hell. At one time they loved each other and wanted to spend their lives together. Times change, feelings change and so should the situation.
Many people stay together and many dont. Dont base your outlook on others outcomes. Your life has nothing to do with a RATIO or statistic.

[Elliot]

Once your married your married.

a marriage ends in 1 of 2 ways :

1.divorce
2.death

THERFORE, 50% of all marriages in in divorce.

TG

lets take 10 of them for example what if 7 end in divorce and the other 3 end in death wouldnt it make for 70%? More marriges end in divorce then death..

[Stea7jjdyEddie]

I have one word for us guys "PRENUP" !!!!!! Then she can't take half


Peace..........

Steaddyyyy........

[bermich]

In California: Prenups mean shiit. Lawyers in California have ways around prenups. Ive heard a lot of stories where the person is still able to take half of what she married into. Weird laws.

[kc]

I've always viewed myself as the "poster child" for the DON"T GET MARRIED campaign. In about 3 hours, I celebrate my 3rd year of marriage. I have learned two very very large things in the last 10 years...3 of which qualify Iin my marriage.

1) Life is too short. Live for today and live for you.
2) Do what you need to do.
3) Screw everybody else, do what works for you.


I took me almost 10 years to really understand that this is true. #1 is really all that matters...really all that can make you smile, day in and day out. So...

my theory....

LIFE IS TOO SHORT, LIFE TODAY FOR TODAY AND TOMORROW FOR YOU!!!!!

[ttuPrincess]

I have one word for us guys "PRENUP" !!!!!! Then she can't take half


Peace..........

Steaddyyyy........

If I ever get divorced..(that would mean I would have to get married 1st).. I don't want 1/2 of his **** that he had before we married.... all I want is what I worked for to pay for and thats it..why do so many women try to take what is not theres??.. once again.. I am reminded of my roommate and speaking about her!!!!!

[bermich]

If I ever get divorced..(that would mean I would have to get married 1st).. I don't want 1/2 of his **** that he had before we married.... all I want is what I worked for to pay for and thats it..why do so many women try to take what is not theres??.. once again.. I am reminded of my roommate and speaking about her!!!!!

Revenge. Marter sorta thing. "Ill show him" thinking. He wants to go screw his secretary, well I will destroy his finances and such. Rack up credit card bills etc. Just immature hatred.

[ttuPrincess]

Revenge. Marter sorta thing. "Ill show him" thinking. He wants to go screw his secretary, well I will destroy his finances and such. Rack up credit card bills etc. Just immature hatred.

Screw all that. I jut say sleep with his best friend!!!!! J/K

[Da Bull]

Revenge. Marter sorta thing. "Ill show him" thinking. He wants to go screw his secretary, well I will destroy his finances and such. Rack up credit card bills etc. Just immature hatred.

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TRUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lostsoul]

i've enjoyed reading this thread, and as a child that grew up hearing my parents fight i think divorce isnt that bad, but i agree a lot of people are making mistakes with who they choose as their partners, i think society doesnt value marriage as much these days as in previous generations.

But how do you know the person you want to marry will still be the love of your life in 20-30 years?? thats a very hard decision to make, i dont plan on getting married anytime soon and i'm 27

[destinationms.o]

Well, my parents are still married...some 38 years I think. And i can remember talk of divorce and arguing, s**t who doesn't....marriage is definitely work...and if you're not willing to work at it then don't get into it. But, remember that life is too short not to be happy! So, if you are married, my thoughts are, if you're not happy do something about it! Because happiness is most important, it reflects the person you are, and the person that you want to be.

dest

[palme]

Well, my parents are still married...some 38 years I think. And i can remember talk of divorce and arguing, s**t who doesn't....marriage is definitely work...and if you're not willing to work at it then don't get into it. But, remember that life is too short not to be happy! So, if you are married, my thoughts are, if you're not happy do something about it! Because happiness is most important, it reflects the person you are, and the person that you want to be.

dest

I agree. To many stay married just b/c it´s easier, they have a house, family, stabile income, but they recent the person they live with so they go cheat on the person with his/her best friend. If your not happy move on! Life is to short.

[BabyGirl01]

I agree completely wiht ttuprincess, people are deffinitly getting married to young. I think that maybe before people get married they should live together to see if they really would like to spend the rest of their lives with this person. I am not sure if that would help to suituation but that's what I would do.

BG

[tryingtogetbig]

you guys are all hitting great points. I have seen way too many people get married for the wrong reasons, have children for the wrong reasons, etc. Really does piss me off when I get to thinking about it.

I have been married 9.5 years...got married when I was 22 and my wife was 21. I am now 31 and she is 30. We have been together most of our adult lives. Everything we have today we built together. Still no kids, maybe one of these days, but when we do have kids it will be well planned and thought out. Seems like common sense to me, but in today's society there seems to be a lacking of common sense when it comes to marriage and having babies.

We lived together for more than a year before getting married, wouldn't do it any other way. Her parents bitched and moaned about it, but like princess said above, you are crazy if you don't live together first. Like KC said, live your life for yourself, or yourselves in this case. Too many people live life trying to make other people happy and then find out years down the road that they themselves aren't happy.

One thing that really frustrates me about couples when they start living together and/or get married is how they so abruptly change their lives. They quit working out and trying to improve themselves physically. Quit getting dressed up and going out...quit eating healthy. To me, correct me if I am wrong here, but once you are married you should have even more drive to improve your physical appearance for your significant other. You should still be going out and flirting with each other, having dates, partying, etc.

I have seen it a thousand times...a couple seperates and the first thing each of them does is start dieting and working out, getting dressed up nice and going out, etc. I don't get it. Frustrates me. Why weren't they doing that to begin with. Lazy is my guess. Laziness in a marriage will only lead to divorce.

Marriage is the hardest thing you can ever be successful at. It is also the most fantastic thing you can ever be a part of. I believe that in order to have a successful marriage, you have to literally stop thinking in the terms of "I" or "me" and start thinking "us" and "we". Your spouse should become the center of your universe...and vice versa. You can still have a life outside the marriage...but your marriage should always be your first concern. Some people are too self centered to be married.

The other thing that gets me is when a marriage is going through a tough time, couples think that adding a baby to the equation will "fix" everything. WRONG. Having a child puts more strain on a marriage than anything else. Why have a kid when the marriage is already shaky. I don't get that either. Pretty greedy in my opinion. Not taking the child's welfare and well being into the equation. So once again, a kid will grow up in a divorced environment.

Okay...I could go on...but I'll shut up now...

peace,

ttgb

[Danielle]

The divorce rate is def. up to 60%+.......esp. around here on Long Island..........i thought it was even higher then that

my parents were divorced when i was 10 years old........i learned to accept it and actually i'd rather have it that way........when 2 people cant get along...its just not a good envoriment.........personally, i dont see myself getting married anytime before 30......if even

but lately i do see people waiting until they are alot older to get married then they were........everyone just lives together now..........which is better IMO

[mass junkie]

Of course the Divorce rate is up.........the ladies now how handsome I am....and they all want a piece of Mass junkie ......Easy ladies...theres enough to go around

[tryingtogetbig]

Of course the Divorce rate is up.........the ladies now how handsome I am....and they all want a piece of Mass junkie ......Easy ladies...theres enough to go around

Too bad nobody likes you as much as....well you!! You pervert!!

peace,

ttgb

[Stea7jjdyEddie]

tryingtogetbig.......I must say that post is great it hit the nail exactly on the head about everything with marriage.....am glad to see and hear that you and your wife are happy......good luck!!!!

Peace........

Steadyyyy...........

[ttuPrincess]

.
One thing that really frustrates me about couples when they start living together and/or get married is how they so abruptly change their lives. They quit working out and trying to improve themselves physically. Quit getting dressed up and going out...quit eating healthy. To me, correct me if I am wrong here, but once you are married you should have even more drive to improve your physical appearance for your significant other. You should still be going out and flirting with each other, having dates, partying, etc.

I started working out again because it is something my signifigant other is really into and now we have something in common and I just plain feel sexier now that Im toning up and losing weight and our sex life is better than ever. Now I don't get dressed for class at all ( I wear my gym close cause thats where Im headed right after class) but when he takes me out, or even when were just gonna lay around the house, I atleast put on jeans and a nice sweater or something and do my hair the way he likes.. it's just a small thing you can do to keep the sparks going.....

You should always constantly be trying to impress the one you love, but most girls and some guys gain what I call "Love Pounds" because they get comfortable when they are with someone.

[peregrine]

i got married when i was 26. i thought i was plenty old enough. last year i got divorced after almost 8 years together. we never really got along but its weird being with someone for that long and come to find out you dont even really know them. she ended up marrying the guy she was f*cking around on me with 2 1/2 months after we got divorced i see now that at 32 im STILL not ready to be married. sure, i would LOVE to have a great woman in my life but theres alot of sh*t i want to do for myself now. like build another turbo mustang and go to school. the thought has crossed my mind that im pretty incompatible with about 98% of the women out there and then im super picky about the other 2% so id say im screwed im not sure if ill ever get married again but im still open to the idea.

[tryingtogetbig]

I started working out again because it is something my signifigant other is really into and now we have something in common and I just plain feel sexier now that Im toning up and losing weight and our sex life is better than ever. Now I don't get dressed for class at all ( I wear my gym close cause thats where Im headed right after class) but when he takes me out, or even when were just gonna lay around the house, I atleast put on jeans and a nice sweater or something and do my hair the way he likes.. it's just a small thing you can do to keep the sparks going.....

You should always constantly be trying to impress the one you love, but most girls and some guys gain what I call "Love Pounds" because they get comfortable when they are with someone.

good job!! I hope he is doing the same in return! Sounds like you understand where I was coming from. "love pounds"... I'm going to use that...hadn't ever heard it before!

peace,

ttgb

[groverman1]

It's around 55-60%. I have one in the books.

[spywizard]

I am going to put forth the idea.... that women see how thier mothers were treated, and alot of these issues get handed down from generation to generation..

on the other hand... alot of women see thier mom is abused (physically or mentally) and they rebel..saying.."i will never let anyone treat me like that" and then thier children learn new ways of dealing with people.

Men are worse.... They are coddled by thier mom's because thier fathers don't know how to relate, or treat them because they were taught by thier fathers (depression era).. the mom's over compensate because here is a man (thier son) that loves them no matter what... so they do everything for them... the issue is that same young man has expectations that they have been taught by thier moms...

The problem becomes this young man who has become dependant on a mom to provide for them.... meets today's woman... who is an equal and won't put up with that crap... this is what i have observed with my 2 daughters..

what a mess.........so today.... each of them go into a relationship with different expectations.......................

[Animal Cracker]

When it comes down to the grit. the average man stands nothing to gain by marriage....there are to many hooks out there giving that stuff away to "buy" it..Also she gets the man's name and his good credit to ruin, while she humps whoever when ol boy is out being the bread-winner...like electricity, most chicks follow the path of least resistence..that is why chicks are hookers,cheaters, strippers and wives.

[spywizard]

Bama............


relax.....................take some clomid or something................

I can make the same arguments and support them.. but.

it is just inflamitory, and might get some people upset........

and you know what happens when that happens...



Now.. take a big breath.... and eat some protein........

When it comes down to the grit. the average man stands nothing to gain by marriage....there are to many hooks out there giving that stuff away to "buy" it..Also she gets the man's name and his good credit to ruin, while she humps whoever when ol boy is out being the bread-winner...like electricity, most chicks follow the path of least resistence..that is why chicks are hookers,cheaters, strippers and wives.

[RON]

I totally thought marriage was for ever. I always said I'd never get a divorce. Look at me now seporated for 2 weeks and ready to file almost.

[Rickson]

Since women are no longer dependent on men for a living or identity I don't think it is suprising at all that the divorce rate has gone up. Women no longer have to take physical or mental abuse from men in order to survive. I don't consider that a bad thing. I do think that with television and the internet peoples perception of what their life should be like has become warped. I think the need for instant gratification and the expectation that one should have a fairy tale life without working at it has contributed to the problem. That along with the opportunity to meet and have affairs with numerous amounts of people via the internet, work, or travel has made this inevitable.

[usualsuspect]

Along the lines of what Rickson said, the huge increase in women's earnings during the last 20 years has also contributed to rising divorce rates. More women today are college educated and make a lot more money then they did 20 yrs ago. Women are more independent then in the past and can rely less on men to support themselves and their family. Gone are the days where the traditional family was the man as the "breadwinner" of the household and the wife as the homemaker.

[spywizard]

Sorry man...........

There is tomorrow.......... are u using all that emotion to work on those legs???

J/K

Good luck.......

I totally thought marriage was for ever. I always said I'd never get a divorce. Look at me now seporated for 2 weeks and ready to file almost.