Question about bloat

[beuleux]

Ive got an unusual question about bloat, what can I take that isnt steriods that will make me bloat like Im on a cycle. The reason being I want to be accused of taking gear when Im not so I can do a test and then really take gear afterwards.

[perfectbeast2001]

erm HCG would do it! Why would you want too though?

[THE PUMP]

i bloat on creatine

bunp

[perfectbeast2001]

you could lower your carbs for a week and drop sodium out of diet then load on carbs and sodium a week later. Instant bloaty man!

[beuleux]

erm HCG would do it! Why would you want too though?

Dang... I knew someone would ask that. The reason is Im having a rather nasty access battle with my ex and if she notices Im taking gear shell use it as an excuse to give me grief in court and the judge might make me do a test cos I made her do a billy test last year. Although its not illegal the court would still frown upon it. So if I get her to wrongly accuse me of taking gear then I can do a negative test and be safe in the knowledge that she wont mention it again for fear of looking like a bullshitting twat. The only other way is the catheter trick but that would be for extreme emergencies only.

HGC would also show in a test wouldnt it?

[plzr8]

Dang... I knew someone would ask that. The reason is Im having a rather nasty access battle with my ex and if she notices Im taking gear shell use it as an excuse to give me grief in court and the judge might make me do a test cos I made her do a billy test last year. Although its not illegal the court would still frown upon it. So if I get her to wrongly accuse me of taking gear then I can do a negative test and be safe in the knowledge that she wont mention it again for fear of looking like a bullshitting twat. The only other way is the catheter trick but that would be for extreme emergencies only.

HGC would also show in a test wouldnt it?

jsut when you thought you heard it all

[beuleux]

jsut when you thought you heard it all

Its no laughing matter... Ive got a cupboard full of gear and I cant take it.

[perfectbeast2001]

HCG would show up if they did a pregnancy test on you!! Unlikely i think. It would not be a good idea to use HCG anyhow. To achive bloat you would have to use enough HCG to elevate estrogen levels. You may be left with gyno ect, not wise. The carb and sodium method would be much beeter. If you really cut them the first week then go mad on carbs and salt the second you should look like a balloon, Keep an eye on BP though.

[perfectbeast2001]

or the next time you see me at tesco express just give me all your gear in a brown paper bag. I will do you a favour and "look after it" for you

[armbar83]

estrogen pills??

[beuleux]

Hmmm ok Ill give that a try.. the carb cutting not the paper bag LOL, my intake at the moment is about 250-275g carbs per day, how low do you suggest going in the first week and how many grams of salt per day in the second week? High BP would be a good thing cos thats what happens when I take deca so if she sees a red face that could possibly work.

I love it when a plan comes together

[IFR]

eat at McDonalds for the rest of the month

[perfectbeast2001]

take carbs down to 50-100g ED. Salt should be ZERO for the week. By the end of the week start cutting water intake and use only dry carbs. by sunday just sip a little water every hour no big drinks, ZERO carbs.
MONDAY PIZZA WATER PIZZA BEER CHINESE TAKEAWAY SALT BEER
you get the idea!! or you could just eat tons of rice and oats and eat some salt with it say 10-20g on the monday, keep it up and se how you look. Basically you are doing a little contest prep and then pigging out after, a sure way to water retention and higher BP. Not very healthy though

[beuleux]

50-100 Man Ill starve... I hope she takes the bait, I got the kids this w/e so ill start monday so hopefully in two weeks time Ill look like a dbol junkie.

[seminole635]

I would take a ton of creatine mono and nitric oxide along with increased sodium... probably healthier than the other option but either will work.