I'm off HRT - Fat, depressed and unmotivated...please read.

**Matty** · 10-09-2002, 11:06 AM

Well I tried to post the short version of what's happened, but it's still pretty long so please bear with me...

I started HRT about 7 months ago with .5 ml test/week due to low test levels. I had some acne and hot flashes but other than that, I had no problems. Starting in August I upped the dose to 1ml/week and noticed nice gains in size and strength. I also noticed increased acne, night sweats, higher blood pressure, mood swings, and slight visual impairments.

Toward the end of August I started getting gyno symptoms (itchy/painful nips) so I got a hold of aromatase inhibitors from my physician and other sources and went on my way. About two weeks later I was still having some symptoms and my physician recommended I stop all HRT and see an endocrinologist. So I took my last test shot about 4 weeks ago and scheduled an appointment with an endo. I continued using the aromatase inhibitors for a couple weeks. Soon after I stopped test, my acne got so widespread and painful that I started to get really worried about scarring. I also lost about 7-10lbs of muscle and have increased chest fat. My nips have never been puffy or stuck out at all - now I have to wear t-shirts under my work shirts so my nips don't stick out. The endocrinologist checked out my chest and didn't find actual breast tissue so I'm pretty sure it's estrogenic fat deposits. This is the biggest problem I have right now - I'm scared to death that this is permanent or will be so hard to work off that I'll have puffy nips forever.

I've always been really good about my diet - resisted junk foods and other crap. But the last three weeks I've seen my discipline in this area shrink dramatically. I can't seem to stop eating the wrong foods: ice cream, cookies, etc. I've also seemed to let up on my work outs - I would do almost anything to NOT miss a workout and I thought about it all day (what I would do and when, how long I would be there, etc.) Now I find myself missing days because I just don't feel like going. I know my estrogen levels are probably so high that working out at this point is pointless.

I know, I should have taken clomid after my test, but I wasn't sure I should with the gyno symptoms. Also, my endocrinologist wants me to do a full range of bloodwork to determine the cause of my low test levels. In order to obtain a valid diagnosis I need to have all my levels where they would be normally. This means no test, anti aromatase, clomid, etc. I didn't think I had a choice in the matter - I had to get off everything.

I'm watching months of hard work and discipline go to sh*t. I busted my ass in the gym and it's all going away. I'm so pissed at myself and haven't slept well in days. I know I'm whining, but I have no one else to speak to about this. My wife knows I'm off but I'm too embarrassed to talk about all the sides I'm experiencing. How do you tell your wife you're worried you might grow tits?

Sorry for the rant - I'm not sure what I expect to gain from this. If anyone has been through some of this or has any advice or knowledge that would help me now or in the future I would appreciate it. I'm scheduled to get my blood work done next week - hopefully I'll find some resolution to my original problem. I'm posting this in other areas so I may receive faster/more responses.

peace.matty

**Billy Boy** · 10-09-2002, 12:14 PM

Matty

There is little you can do until your endocrinologist finsh their work.Determining your blood work should help you out and you will be getting good medical advice.Until you know that you are unable to do anything and lets face it a week will not make much difference to you.

I understand you feeling down and one of the side effects of feeling down is that our diet and training turns to shit.In all honesty getting your diet back on track as with the training may actually help to take your mind of the problem.Negative thinking can help increase the anxiety of a problem.Also another thing to remember is that if you stop training you lose gains very quickly.Now get your ass abck in the gym!

Speak to your wife she should know you better than anyone and a problem shared is a problem halved.She may understand more than you think.

Remain positive its hard but it is better for you and your health in the long run.

**Matty** · 10-09-2002, 02:33 PM

Thanks Billy. I know I need to keep going and not let this setback keep me down. I do have some more questions for you or anyone else who might know:

Are the chest fat and puffy nipples I've developed permanent fixtures?

I'm thinking I should cut for a while - thoughts?

If my endocrinologist decides to continue HRT will this help with my current situation as far as getting rid of the chest fat?

Thanks and if anyone can offer me some personal experience in this area I'd appreciate it.

peace.matty