i basically broke down to my best friend on sunday a week into clomid when i told her that i have had feelings for her for the last 5 years. i am currently 5.5 months into a relationship but i couldn't go on living in a lie so i finally sacked up and told both my gf and my best friend. my gf and i broke up in a torrid manner and my best friend told me that she has always seen me like a brother and best friend, not anything romantic.
me being the tactful and always analytical person i strive to be basically told the best friend that i broke up with my gf for her, etc etc. when i found that my love was unrequited i told her that we could not continue seeing each other as friends because it tears me from the inside every time i hear about her latest bf treating her like shit or her problems of not finding a 'quality' guy. she was confused and bewildered of why all this was happening and started to try to console me, but i was bawling my eyes out guys, it was like the floodgates that were closed the last 3 years just opened up.she tried to wipe away my tears but i pulled away and had my best line to anyone, ever when i said 'i want my tears to hit the ground at your feet so you know they are for you'. she was very upset and i left a minute later and drove around for a few hours.
i returned home about 2 hours later after driving around aimlessly and sat down to write a new song about her...took me 45 minutes to get lyrics and the riff down and i recorded it to a cd. got in my car and drove to her house to tape it to the outside of her car. she listened to it and broke down herself to me on the phone, which caused me to break down a second time so now i sit here depressed as hell sans gf and the most influential female in my entire life.
im glad i have everyone here to share this with because i have been a mess ever since this happened and it has only been a day...anyone have any advice here about how to patch things up? i told her i never wanted to speak again or see her, but i know i won't be able to do that...how long do you think i should wait before making further contact? im sitting here kicking myself for saying anything now, but i needed to do it...