dbol is the answer . period
imo. its time to make a change and switch things up a bit. take on a new goal. still fitness and physique related, but something new and fresh.
I remember a couple years back after a few major surgeries and being bed ridden nearly a year and losing 40 pounds of muscle and being hooked on pain meds , I was pretty depressed with the gym. heck I owned the gym but didn't even want to show up in person because I felt so small and weak (I was also having to use an old man walker just to get around)..
feeling like a weak ass little pussy and half crippled and knowing I wasn't clear from the doc to do full body training and grow again, I decided to re focus my goal. I wanted to go from weak and broken to repping 315 on bench press (the only lift I could do in that current situation).. so thats what I did . I went to the gym and mainly only trained for the sole focus of bench press strength. I didn't care about the mirror . I only cared that my bench strength was increasing every single week..
I eventually was not using a walker to walk around my gym and was no longer having my wife load up plates for me. I hit the 315 for a couple reps.. I had gained 25 or so pounds without trying, it just came naturally with the new goal.
lol yes , picture me half crippled in my gym having to hobble around using a walker and my wife used to have to pick up and load plates for me.. but I'd still awkwardly lay down on the bench press and rep out 225 for a set of 15, even though I couldn't load the plates on the bar myself .
anyhow, my point is sometimes you may just need to re focus and adjust your goals .. depression for most men happens when your not CONQUERING something and kicking some ass . find a goal or something to conquer and kick it in the fucking ass. thats what we are built and designed to do . thats your purpose . when you lose that focus and purpose and are just spinning your wheels and not conquering shit then depression can set in