It sounds to me like she made the right decision for HER. At this point I'm guessing you aren't supporting her or the two other kids and you are probably a bit young to be getting into that anyway. Should she have consulted you.....yes because that was your child too.....but you yourself stated you are sort of relieved that she didn't dump the decision on you. If she's a good woman....and it sounds like she made the best choice for the children she already has and maybe even YOU.....I wouldn't hold it against her.
I would sit down with her and have a heart to heart and find out what her future birth control plans are and......tell her that if this happens again......you WANT to be involved. Tell her you would have supported her decision but feel you deserve a voice. Maybe in the past, with the other children....she dealt with a man that wasn't capable of dealing with those issues, etc.
Don't run from a good thing.
Just my two cents!
Originally Posted by
tonytone36
So I have been dating this girl for a few months now....She is 28 (I'm 21) and she already has 2 kids, 8 and 5 years old. She recently told me that she was going to get an IUD (Intra Uterine Device, a type of birth control) put in. She said that she had an appt coming up. She goes to it, says that she had bloodwork, got examined, and needed to go back the next day. I say OK, seems normal, and didn't think anything of it. The day of her follow up I go meet her and she tells me that she didn't get the IUD, but got something else......OK, so my first thought is she got the shot, or had decided to just get her tubes tied (she told me she had thought about having her tubes tied). But she eventually tells me that she got none of those, and that she had........................an abortion. I was speechless. Said that she had been 8 weeks in. She said that she didn't know if she should tell me or not. Now normally I'm full of intelligent things to say, but I could say nothing. I told her I didn't think any less of her, and I was glad that she finally thought that she could tell me. But I'm stuck on this. I don't really know how to feel. Am I sad? not really. I'm not angry. Abortion is such an easy issue to debate, but when it comes down to your own life, it's very difficult. I never considered myself pro-choice or pro-life, and this has not changed anything. Maybe I'm a little relieved that the weight of the decision was not put on my shoulders. Maybe I would have liked to know. There's really no way to tell. I guess the only way to describe how I feel is empty and helpless. It's so easy to say that if i got a girl pregnant that I would want her to have an abortion, but if i was really faced with the decision, all the "what ifs" go out the window. I have a feeling this will be weighing on my mind for a while. Should I look at her the same way now? Any thoughts/comments are appreciated.
1. Once a cheat always a cheat!
2. YES, SHE can get pregnant the first time!
3. NO, PULLING out IS NOT a RELIABLE method of Birth Control. DAMMMMIT..... Wrap that shyte UP!!
Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage.
What the mind can conceive....the body will achieve!
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