Married in 21 Days...

[JayceonTaylor]

Morning guys,

So 3 weeks today and im supposed to get married to the woman i want to spend my lifetime with. And so many cracks are appearing...

Back when i proposed last june i was so certain about the choice i was making. i thought we had trust, honesty and alot of love.

A year down the line and different events in the past few months have had me wondering is this the right decision?

Im not sure where to start but last week she went through my phone and emails and made some aquisations. I asked her why she did it and she said she didnt know what came over her. I dont know what she was looking for, but i have nothing to hide.

The aquisations came about one of my mates texting me and she completely misinterpretted what he had said and was quoting some lyrics in a song about a workout we were going to have.

The thing is a few of her ex boyfriends have been calling her and texting her and she has been replying she told me that,,,but do i really want to go into married life with ex's sniffing around?

Im not saying im perfect but any ex's who got in touch with me i told them flat out... not interested im happy and im getting married, i think out of respect for my fiance and the fact that im genuinly not interested. They are in the past and i can move from that. One of them was persistant and i changed my phone number, because im seriously in love with the woman im marrying and dont want anything to come between that.

Whereas she has contact with a few of her ex's and i think to myself do i really want to have to deal with this shit for the next 10yrs? There is also her baby's dad, but to be honest since we said we were getting married he respected that.

This is just scratching the surface she has accused me of cheating a few times, i just dont know whether it is a good idea to marry a woman when she doesnt trust me. Well she says she trusts me, but doesnt trust my friends...what the **** is that all about? im my own man and people aint going to influence me to do anything i dont want.

The thing is from the very start i said to myself this woman is special and im going to be all the things i can be from the start, faithful, honest, loyal everything that a man should be and i feel like im almost getting taken for granted.

Im off to work now but will be back soon...

[scaramouche]

welcome to the world my friend lol,happy endings r for the movies

[sorel_C]

Personally i wouldt take that step if i had some questions or doubts floating around

[taiboxa]

aww.. lol i remember when i tied the not .. got divorced w/in 2-3 years too! great combo!

either way everyone needs a starter marriage now days

[K.Biz]

aww.. lol i remember when i tied the not .. got divorced w/in 2-3 years too! great combo!

either way everyone needs a starter marriage now days

F*ck That!

Why waste your time and money on a mrriage you dont think is going to work. Also if your getting married to the women you love.... then why wouldnt you discuss this with her? Tell her exactly what you told us.

Also in my past experiences, girls who are all over you about cheating and are insecure about it, are probably cheating themselves. By themselves cheating they see how easy it is, so they are like "sh*t mabye hes doing the same thing" and then she'll go snooping around.

Its just seems like theres a lack of trust in your relationship. You obviously want to marry her... but is it a great idea? Who knows... only you can decide that.

NOT ONE person here can give you a straight answer. we dont no you or your wife, so goodluck.

[paulzane]

Having many, many friends who have gone through divorce, and having been married three times myself all I will say is DON'T DO IT

How do you turn a million into $250,000 in two steps?

He gets divorced and remarried .... $1,000,000 / 2 = $500,000 (divorce)
$500,000 / 2 = $250,000 (marry)

AND that is only the assets ... not taking into account the upkeep and maintenance etc. etc.

I do not know why men actually get married now-a-days??????????

[Obs]

Lets see... She is untrusting, paranoid, jumps to conclusions, and likes to keep her exes as... Friends!? Sounds like a match made in heaven! Enjoy the rest of your lives together!

[Obs]

Having many, many friends who have gone through divorce, and having been married three times myself all I will say is DON'T DO IT

How do you turn a million into $250,000 in two steps?

He gets divorced and remarried .... $1,000,000 / 2 = $500,000 (divorce)
$500,000 / 2 = $250,000 (marry)

AND that is only the assets ... not taking into account the upkeep and maintenance etc. etc.

I do not know why men actually get married now-a-days??????????

I'm sorry but your math is wrong $1,000,000+marriage=0$

[Lexed]

OH man this thread has alot of potential. Cant wait to see the results in 1 month

[G-1000]

Dont do it if your not 100% sure.

[taiboxa]

Having many, many friends who have gone through divorce, and having been married three times myself all I will say is DON'T DO IT

How do you turn a million into $250,000 in two steps?

He gets divorced and remarried .... $1,000,000 / 2 = $500,000 (divorce)
$500,000 / 2 = $250,000 (marry)

AND that is only the assets ... not taking into account the upkeep and maintenance etc. etc.

I do not know why men actually get married now-a-days??????????

LOL when we got divorced we payed the 100 dolla processin fee... and then split everything by Who's was originally who's and who bot wat.. so i left w/ my computer.. steroids and my 125lb watercore heavy bag (WHICH I HAVE NO PLACE TO HANG IT NOW!)
she got the house, cats, nice car and.. other better computer

[5ifthCitizen]

F*ck That!

Why waste your time and money on a mrriage you dont think is going to work. Also if your getting married to the women you love.... then why wouldnt you discuss this with her? Tell her exactly what you told us.

Also in my past experiences, girls who are all over you about cheating and are insecure about it, are probably cheating themselves. By themselves cheating they see how easy it is, so they are like "sh*t mabye hes doing the same thing" and then she'll go snooping around.

Its just seems like theres a lack of trust in your relationship. You obviously want to marry her... but is it a great idea? Who knows... only you can decide that.

NOT ONE person here can give you a straight answer. we dont no you or your wife, so goodluck.

i agree, the only way you're going to figure things out is if you tell her exactly what you're thinking. no reason to just hope you know whats going on when you have the answers right in front of you. how long have you been with this woman?

[Theatrix]

aww.. lol i remember when i tied the not .. got divorced w/in 2-3 years too! great combo!

either way everyone needs a starter marriage now days

LOL....Ain't that the truth. But make sure you keep it short. Don't want that alimony to become lifetime (after 10 yrs)! Just long enough too find out what you DON't want!

[KAEW44]

Dont do it if your not 100% sure.

Dont do it EVEN if your 100% sure!!

[MrTAME]

I was married once. I will never do it again.

She was always accusing me of cheating and telling me she didnt trust me and what not. I was 100% faithful to her...I never hugged any other women unless they were family and I never led any woman on either. It turned out in the end that she had cheated on me with over 10 guys...... GROSS, I became sick to my stomach and I couldnt eat for a long time... I had a son with her too...dear god what a woman. I took her from trash nd made her into a queen...the only thanks I get from it is still to this day giving her an alotted amount of money every month which is court ordered....I'm not bitter at all . . . . .
Just watch out man, I found that out the hard way. My X was alaways talkin to her Ex's and it turns out she was nailing them under my nose for years... I am not saying youre fiancee is like that at all. Everyone is different. But seriously take youre time and think things through, make sure she is the one before you tie the knot.

[Polska]

Marriage nowadays is just a social construct to fuel the economy. There are other factors that feed into it too, like the post-modern feminist movement... marriage might have worked in the 50s-60s etc more than it does now, but things change. I am not saying that there can't be happy marriages until death... but the trends don't lie.

What's wrong with staying commonlaw? It's cheaper

[5ifthCitizen]

I was married once. I will never do it again.

She was always accusing me of cheating and telling me she didnt trust me and what not. I was 100% faithful to her...I never hugged any other women unless they were family and I never led any woman on either. It turned out in the end that she had cheated on me with over 10 guys...... GROSS, I became sick to my stomach and I couldnt eat for a long time... I had a son with her too...dear god what a woman. I took her from trash nd made her into a queen...the only thanks I get from it is still to this day giving her an alotted amount of money every month which is court ordered....I'm not bitter at all . . . . .
Just watch out man, I found that out the hard way. My X was alaways talkin to her Ex's and it turns out she was nailing them under my nose for years... I am not saying youre fiancee is like that at all. Everyone is different. But seriously take youre time and think things through, make sure she is the one before you tie the knot.

i know what thats like, but wow man, ur wife? i cant imagine how much worse that would be. how long ago was all of this?

[MrTAME]

we ended just over a year ago now... but there is still a lot of things tying us together, like our son, lawyers, family, etc.

I would love to never hear from her again, but that will never happen. She has my son and I have to try to be a part of hislife as much as I can. Even though he is on the other side of the country now. After we split she moved in with a guy and I had our son. Being in the military and being a single father was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I work shift work in the military and I was running out of friends to watch my son in the evenings when I had to work. When I was on day shift it was fine, I would take him to a day home, but nights were rough and in the end I had to give her custody of our son. When I was raising him on my own she never once called to see how he was doing, it disgusted me. She wouldnteven help me in the evenings when I had to work and she lived with her new man right around the corner, literally right around the corner. At first the courts gave me custody because she wasn't stable enough to raise him. But in the end she's got custody and she moved across the country.....plah its hard shit to deal with, especially when lawyers are calling and she is calling and asking for more and more money all the time.
Anywho, now I have met a single mother of 2 gurls. She's one of the strongest willed people I have ever met... its 6 months into and never, ever, would I think about marrying her...she doesnt want to marry either, she had a rough tim with her ex husband....blah blah blah...I am ranting

[5ifthCitizen]

we ended just over a year ago now... but there is still a lot of things tying us together, like our son, lawyers, family, etc.

I would love to never hear from her again, but that will never happen. She has my son and I have to try to be a part of hislife as much as I can. Even though he is on the other side of the country now. After we split she moved in with a guy and I had our son. Being in the military and being a single father was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I work shift work in the military and I was running out of friends to watch my son in the evenings when I had to work. When I was on day shift it was fine, I would take him to a day home, but nights were rough and in the end I had to give her custody of our son. When I was raising him on my own she never once called to see how he was doing, it disgusted me. She wouldnteven help me in the evenings when I had to work and she lived with her new man right around the corner, literally right around the corner. At first the courts gave me custody because she wasn't stable enough to raise him. But in the end she's got custody and she moved across the country.....plah its hard shit to deal with, especially when lawyers are calling and she is calling and asking for more and more money all the time.
Anywho, now I have met a single mother of 2 gurls. She's one of the strongest willed people I have ever met... its 6 months into and never, ever, would I think about marrying her...she doesnt want to marry either, she had a rough tim with her ex husband....blah blah blah...I am ranting

well thats good you've found somebody else...i just have a question. you have to pay her money obviously for your son but do u have to give her money for herself also? i dont understand why you would have to if she was the one that caused the divorce. where you based at? if u dont mind me asking.

[Huckster]

Always accusing of cheating! That's a big warning sign bro. It never stops (even when you've been married for 5 year) and that alone leads to real trust issues and will be way too much for a good bro to handle.

I learned my lesson as well. Married for about 7 years, now divorced and couldn't be happier being unattached. Cost a couple grand.

[thetank]

damn doesnt this thread just put y'all on a cloud of optimism? i cant wait to find my dream girl make her my wife, get HIV from her behind-my-back orgies lose everything and go on a shooting spree in K-mart. i guess thats love.

[number twelve]

F*ck That!

Why waste your time and money on a mrriage you dont think is going to work. Also if your getting married to the women you love.... then why wouldnt you discuss this with her? Tell her exactly what you told us.

Also in my past experiences, girls who are all over you about cheating and are insecure about it, are probably cheating themselves. By themselves cheating they see how easy it is, so they are like "sh*t mabye hes doing the same thing" and then she'll go snooping around.

Its just seems like theres a lack of trust in your relationship. You obviously want to marry her... but is it a great idea? Who knows... only you can decide that.

NOT ONE person here can give you a straight answer. we dont no you or your wife, so goodluck.

very good post kev

[paulzane]

damn doesnt this thread just put y'all on a cloud of optimism? i cant wait to find my dream girl make her my wife, get HIV from her behind-my-back orgies lose everything and go on a shooting spree in K-mart. i guess thats love.

WTF?

[taiboxa]

i like kake

[rubix6]

aww.. lol i remember when i tied the not .. got divorced w/in 2-3 years too! great combo!

either way everyone needs a starter marriage now days

????????????

[taiboxa]

????????????

your uhh.. not my ex are you?!