Having relationship problems.... Don't know what to do..

[PistolPete33]

Well, I've been married now for 5 1/2 years and have been with my wife for 8 1/2 years. Things were pretty good with us for quite some time but over the last year have gotten worse. We have a 17 month old son which I love more than anything in this world. However, our sex life is nonexistent. It's was tough when she was pregnant because I didn't want to have sex with her at that point but that was the one time she was hornier than ever. Anyways, after she gave birth she is never in the mood. I'm a sexual person and I need it 3+ times a week but I only get it 3-4 times a month. We've discussed this at length basically every single week. I've brought it up joking and we've had the obvious fights about it. She will then say lets do it tomorrow night but then tomorrow will come and she has an excuse not to. I told her it's to the point that we will break up over this because I just can't deal with it. I've even asked if she could do oral on me and that would be fine but she won't ever do that. She's never done it without sex EVER.... I'm at the point of going outside the relationship to get what I want. I don't want to ruin things with us esp. because of our son but I have needs too. I just don't know what to do because if it stays this way for even another month or two I'm going to throw in the towel.

Any advice?

[DSM4Life]

I think you need to tell her about this and no "jokingly." Also you both need to sit down and get some professional help.

[D7M]

^wow. I never thought I'd say it......but I agree with DSM.

[J-Dogg]

She sounds like a uptight beeotch.

I'd cheat on her.

Note: Do not take relationship advice from me, mine are always messy.

[Kibble]

Damn bro- sorry about your situation. Maybe she has lost her sex drive, or desire. I think that you should just be very aggressive. Just grab her firmly and kiss all over her neck and pull her hair. Act like you are one of those soldier guys who just got back from Iraq for 15 months and has not seen his newlywed wife. That will spark things up. When my wife is mad at me and won't talk to me, I usually just say **** it, and go for her aggressively. It works.

Just don't go crazy. If she looks scared or really sad, then abort. But if she still doesn't bite... then tell her you want a threesome. What is the worst that can happen? She stops wanting sex?

[elpropiotorvic]

She needs to feel " conected " spice it up write her a letter telling her how happy u are abou the relationship and bla bla... Buy flowers 4 days later .....take her out to that restaurant where u guys used to have romantic dinners.... If possible and if u did take her to wherever u proposed and be romantic ...


She just wants the " connection" so just spice it up

[Kibble]

One thing I learned is to never ask for sex. Just take it. Or at least just try to go for it

[zimmy]

sex is an important part of the relationship...it sounds harsh but I agree with the idea of breaking up over it. Talk to her...if she doesn't want to work it out (find out whatever hang up she is having), then you need to consider moving on. I believe there is no good reason for cheating...if people did like you and considered things way before they are tempted...then cheating wouldnt' happen. so kuddo's to you and i'm sorry for your situation.

[Mooseman33]

slip her a roofie/ghb, then take what u need...

[calgarian]

let me guess it was natural birth. Did she tell you or notice that she is in pain when u intercourse? if thats the case its not her fault after the natural birth muscles(down there) tend to do that. in this case take her to gynecologist but make sure thats the case

[gixxerboy1]

tell her to go see a Dr. Her hormones levels could be way off from being pregnant and that's why she has no sex drive.

[sigman roid]

I would just sit down and talk to her,tell her its getting to the point where your gonna walk away and see if you can come(no pun intended) to a solution if not then maybe it is time to walk

[J-Dogg]

tell her to go see a Dr. Her hormones levels could be way off from being pregnant and that's why she has no sex drive.

Hormones or not, I think a girl has an obligation to do this "chore" even if they don't have the desire too.

Girls don't understand how fusterating it is to sleep next to a girl you are trying to bang, and you just get turned down every night and are stuck laying next to them with anger in your heart.

Girls always tend to make it out that it's the man's issue, cause they want to have sex, like there is something wrong with us because we desire that release.

A girl (normally) works 8 hours a day, for an employeer, so does a man. We do the dishes, laundry, we work all day. The girl can't put in 20 minutes 3 times a week to keep her husband happy?

I'd honestly just cheat on her. I know everyone will get their panties in a bunch and say that's wrong, but it's wrong for her to be so inconsiderate too. If she don't find out, big deal, you are getting it some place else, she'll probably start to feel a little insecure,and guess what....? She'll start listening and putting out because she feels insecure.

If you get caught, you can use it to end the relationship, or let her make the choice.

Cheat on her, it's a win - win situation. We are non-monogamist mammals by nature, society just tells us we should not be.

[Kratos]

let me guess it was natural birth. Did she tell you or notice that she is in pain when u intercourse? if thats the case its not her fault after the natural birth muscles(down there) tend to do that. in this case take her to gynecologist but make sure thats the case

but, she won't even do oral, that's just selfish

[*El Diablo*]

but, she won't even do oral, that's just selfish

^^^^ i agree.

[J-Dogg]

^^^^ i agree.

I think he just needs to do what Vinny The Chin does and bang some hoobags

[calgarian]

but, she won't even do oral, that's just selfish

there are some chicks that dont do it period.....i have been with few that dont but they let me stick in the pooper

[gixxerboy1]

Hormones or not, I think a girl has an obligation to do this "chore" even if they don't have the desire too.Girls don't understand how fusterating it is to sleep next to a girl you are trying to bang, and you just get turned down every night and are stuck laying next to them with anger in your heart.

Girls always tend to make it out that it's the man's issue, cause they want to have sex, like there is something wrong with us because we desire that release.

A girl (normally) works 8 hours a day, for an employeer, so does a man. We do the dishes, laundry, we work all day. The girl can't put in 20 minutes 3 times a week to keep her husband happy?

I'd honestly just cheat on her. I know everyone will get their panties in a bunch and say that's wrong, but it's wrong for her to be so inconsiderate too. If she don't find out, big deal, you are getting it some place else, she'll probably start to feel a little insecure,and guess what....? She'll start listening and putting out because she feels insecure.

If you get caught, you can use it to end the relationship, or let her make the choice.

Cheat on her, it's a win - win situation. We are non-monogamist mammals by nature, society just tells us we should not be.

To the parts in bold
He didn't feel obligated when she was pregnant and she wanted sex.

Maybe that is how it is in your house. My wife works and does stuff around the house.

Would you recommend girls cheat on the guys on here that do shitty pct and cant get it up?

[Kratos]

there are some chicks that dont do it period.....i have been with few that dont but they let me stick in the pooper

that's bull-crap, she needs to man up if she won't let him in the doors

[firmechicano831]

if she doesn't do oral or want to have sex just give her a pearl necklace and rubb it in between her boobs.

[DSM4Life]

if she doesn't do oral or want to have sex just give her a pearl necklace and rubb it in between her boobs.

[calgarian]

that's bull-crap, she needs to man up if she won't let him in the doors

thats y i whore!!!!!!

[J-Dogg]

To the parts in bold
He didn't feel obligated when she was pregnant and she wanted sex.

Maybe that is how it is in your house. My wife works and does stuff around the house.

Would you recommend girls cheat on the guys on here that do shitty pct and cant get it up?

Ya, preferable with me too

No reason the guy on PCT can't go down for a snack on her though, if she really wants it. It's not like it's that hard, takes that long or is that much of an inconvenience. And if you don't, it probably will eventually cause problems in the relationship.

When guys turn down girls, it's even worse because girls feel they are not "pretty enough" or attractive anymore. There must be something wrong if he won't sleep with me!?

Only a matter of time before they start complaining to a guy friend, or ex boyfriend about how infrequent they get sex and one thing leads to another.

[Panzerfaust]

The bitch is broke, get a new one.

[Panzerfaust]

She probably has depression or whatever shit women have all of a sudden once they drop calf.

Get her to a doctor.

[PistolPete33]

We had a great talk tonight regarding this. She said she has been trying to make things more frequent but feels that I haven't gotten the clues. We've both been stressed out a lot lately with work and some minor issues with our son. (he may have Cyliac) She said she is willing to make sure we do it 2-3 times a week and if we have to we can even schedule it. She said she hasn't been feeling well this week so that's the reason for things this week. I def. don't think I could ever cheat on her as I do love her and it seems that maybe now she'll make the effort and things will improve.

[Panzerfaust]

LMAO @ scheduling sex. Get a ****ing clue and get her to a doctor or something.

[PistolPete33]

The worst of this entire situation is that when we do have sex it as awesome... We just did and it was fantastic. She is pretty open minded when we do (except for the oral thing) but we def. keep it interesting. Who the hell knows??? Maybe I will give her a little more of what she wants (hugging and all that crap) and I will get more of what I want.

[elpropiotorvic]

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/845150/

[MaNiCC]

Guys remember, this ain't just some girl, its his wife, also he has a son to consider

[PistolPete33]

I think things are moving in the right direction. We had a great discussion the other night and since then things have been great. We'll take it one day at a time and keep the communication going and I'm confident things will work out for the best. Plus, I wouldn't want my son to have to grow up without both parents being around.

[MaNiCC]

I never had a dad and i intend to be around for my kids when i have some, throwing in the towel or cheating would be a very bad idea imo, keep us posted mate, Bo's good with relationship problems and his advice is constructive

[Tjohn6231]

Well, I've been married now for 5 1/2 years and have been with my wife for 8 1/2 years. Things were pretty good with us for quite some time but over the last year have gotten worse. We have a 17 month old son which I love more than anything in this world. However, our sex life is nonexistent. It's was tough when she was pregnant because I didn't want to have sex with her at that point but that was the one time she was hornier than ever. Anyways, after she gave birth she is never in the mood. I'm a sexual person and I need it 3+ times a week but I only get it 3-4 times a month. We've discussed this at length basically every single week. I've brought it up joking and we've had the obvious fights about it. She will then say lets do it tomorrow night but then tomorrow will come and she has an excuse not to. I told her it's to the point that we will break up over this because I just can't deal with it. I've even asked if she could do oral on me and that would be fine but she won't ever do that. She's never done it without sex EVER.... I'm at the point of going outside the relationship to get what I want. I don't want to ruin things with us esp. because of our son but I have needs too. I just don't know what to do because if it stays this way for even another month or two I'm going to throw in the towel.

Any advice?

Her hormones are still not back to normal is what this sounds like. After my daughter was born......my wife, and I hardly ever had sex for a long time. I always wanted it, and she didnt. Now its years later, and we screw 4 times/week. We had another kid since then. She might need to have some bloodwork done or something. Im no expert, but thats what it sounds like.

[DOM6]

but, she won't even do oral, that's just selfish

Thats when you break out the baby oil and say
" Look biotch, your *****s broken and mouth is tired but you have 2 hands and i know 1 of them is working so get to work, LMAO

[ranging1]

just give her some foreplay

if she says no, just tease her, rub her clit up abit, kiss, lick her etc etc, whatever u know turns her on

when uve played with her long enough, stick ya fingers in their and play around fo 5 mins

then ask her does she wanna do it, works on my misses when shes wrecked

5 mins of foreplay and were horny humpy rabbits

[Bojangles69]

Divorce her. Thats where its heading anyway.

But dont throw yourself on top her, thats gonna make things worse. Desperate times DO NOT call for desperate measures.

If shes not there physically shes sure not there mentally. You need to engage her strongly inside her skull. Give her the ultimate ultimatum (divorce) with the *option of seeing a marraige therapist first.
If she takes the option, make sure you find the best therapist you can.
Maybe get her hormones checked too

Or you can wait.. till your kid is 10 and you still haven't had sex.

[higherdesire]

Pistol, bro kudos to you for openess in the post. I have been there too. I will tell you that being the initiator in the intimacy and spending a few minute tuning her up will go a very long way. Good luck, it sounds like you are on the right path.

For all you tools telling him to cheat on his wife and get a divorce...clown advice. Just pure stupidity. Jdogg you are so out of line in this thread it is rediculous. To each his own. This is my piece, and you have yours.

[Misery13]

I think you need to tell her about this and no "jokingly." Also you both need to sit down and get some professional help.

I also agree...

[thai-lan]

i think you need to travel to asia