when do the measures you take to grow more become too crazy?

[NVR2BIG1]

Guys, maybe some of you can understand this. I have been bodybuilding for 15 years now and competing for 10 so far. After my first 3 yrs in the gym I was about 225 lbs, maybe 12% bf. From then on I have managed to take it to around 250 lbs off season, as far as quality size and lean I'd say I'm around 220 lbs in shape, 210 on stage. Over time I have developed a more dense, quality physique at similar size to few yrs prior. My arms have been close to 19" at their largest, chest just over 50", quads around 28", waist 34". Ok, so what I'm getting at is this. Lately, seems like the measures I have to take to grow anymore become so insane its almost not worth it to me. I dont necessarily mean gear, but recovery issues and feeling like shit in general from eating 5000+ cals/day. All I want to do is sleep, I feel like crap every morning, I feel groggy and lethargic 90% of the time. Its getting insane, now I'm currently 240 lbs at 5'9", I want to grow bigger but I need to live life too. I have some cjc-1295 and ghrp-2 on the way, and if its anything like GH I'll probably be even more tired!! I was going to run gram/wk test along w/ 40mg/day dbol, and cjc, ghrp, and insulin. Well today I got thinking WTF, why am I going to put myself through this just to order much more in next 10 wks and possibly feel even worse? So was thinking about trying to do just 1000mcg/wk cjc instead of 2000/wk, possibly stretch it out more and maybe feel better? Also debating on whether or not to drop that test to 500mg instead of a gram. Also thinking about going back to eating cleaner, possibly I could be a more quality 220 lbs when its all said and done? I dont know WTF I'm really asking, but maybe there comes a time where I'm gonna need to accept the fact that trying to be a lean 250 lbs is going to cost me a lot more than I want to go through.

[Knockout_Power]

Well, Im nowhere near where you are but I am having this debate right now. How much do I want to even maintain my current mass let alone another 10 more lbs. The extra eating, the food bill, the future gear bills, the strict dieting and training while on cycle... Im not sure if its something I really want to do. I have other hobbies that I would like to direct my time and money towards and since I have no ambition to step on stage, why do I keep doing this?

You being even bigger and further into your developement, Im not sure where you find the enthusiasm and dedication to keep pushing forward year after year...

just my $0.02

-KP

[Friend]

Put down the weights, pick up the crack pipe IMO.

[olderfella]

The decision has to be yours nvr only you can answer what you want to achieve and what you want to go through,what you do is a lifestyle its a hard expensive and at times a soul dystroying pastime that to achieve even a top 3 placing in a small show takes time,money and dedication as you are 100% aware.Only you know the answer good luck with what ever way you decide to go

[Swifto]

Guys, maybe some of you can understand this. I have been bodybuilding for 15 years now and competing for 10 so far. After my first 3 yrs in the gym I was about 225 lbs, maybe 12% bf. From then on I have managed to take it to around 250 lbs off season, as far as quality size and lean I'd say I'm around 220 lbs in shape, 210 on stage. Over time I have developed a more dense, quality physique at similar size to few yrs prior. My arms have been close to 19" at their largest, chest just over 50", quads around 28", waist 34". Ok, so what I'm getting at is this. Lately, seems like the measures I have to take to grow anymore become so insane its almost not worth it to me. I dont necessarily mean gear, but recovery issues and feeling like shit in general from eating 5000+ cals/day. All I want to do is sleep, I feel like crap every morning, I feel groggy and lethargic 90% of the time. Its getting insane, now I'm currently 240 lbs at 5'9", I want to grow bigger but I need to live life too. I have some cjc-1295 and ghrp-2 on the way, and if its anything like GH I'll probably be even more tired!! I was going to run gram/wk test along w/ 40mg/day dbol, and cjc, ghrp, and insulin. Well today I got thinking WTF, why am I going to put myself through this just to order much more in next 10 wks and possibly feel even worse? So was thinking about trying to do just 1000mcg/wk cjc instead of 2000/wk, possibly stretch it out more and maybe feel better? Also debating on whether or not to drop that test to 500mg instead of a gram. Also thinking about going back to eating cleaner, possibly I could be a more quality 220 lbs when its all said and done? I dont know WTF I'm really asking, but maybe there comes a time where I'm gonna need to accept the fact that trying to be a lean 250 lbs is going to cost me a lot more than I want to go through.

What kind of life is walking around at 240lbs feeling like utter shit? Its not IMHO.

Get down to a weight you feel comfortable at and start to love life again.

You could die an unhappy man if you were to get hit by a bus tomorrow on the way to work.

I'll never let a hobby, lifestyle, whatever you want to call it, make me feel like shit, be tired and unhappy 24/7.

F*ck that.

[Swifto]

Walking around at 240lbs at 5"9 feeling like shit, tired and not enjoying yourself isnt healthy. I dont care if your BW comes back perfect. You need to keep your mind healthy as its your most powerful tool.

[Knockout_Power]

Walking around at 240lbs at 5"9 feeling like shit, tired and not enjoying yourself isnt healthy. I dont care if your BW comes back perfect. You need to keep your mind healthy as its your most powerful tool.

I agree, Im 5'9 and just starting to push towards the 230 mark and its becoming uncomfortable to eat, train and live this level and Im no where near the muscle density or quality... Im pretty sure this will be my last "growing" cycle and from here on in most likely just maintanance.

[Swifto]

I agree, Im 5'9 and just starting to push towards the 230 mark and its becoming uncomfortable to eat, train and live this level and Im no where near the muscle density or quality... Im pretty sure this will be my last "growing" cycle and from here on in most likely just maintanance.

The biggest I've been is around 220lbs at 5"11 and around 10-12%. Even on an AI my face didnt look right. I was on a small dose of Dbol/Test Prop. It wasnt that bad, but I cant imagine being 250lbs. Wow.

I'm around 205-207lbs now, natural and feel good.

When I get to the point regular clothes dont fit, energy levels are down, its just generally too hard to function, thats it for me. I wouldn't want to be any bigger unless I decide to compete.

We'll see...

In 3-4 years time I may be playing the size game and I might have to eat these words! LOL

[Hazard]

The biggest I've been is around 220lbs at 5"11 and around 10-12%. Even on an AI my face didnt look right. I was on a small dose of Dbol/Test Prop. It wasnt that bad, but I cant imagine being 250lbs. Wow.

I'm around 205-207lbs now, natural and feel good.

When I get to the point regular clothes dont fit, energy levels are down, its just generally too hard to function, thats it for me. I wouldn't want to be any bigger unless I decide to compete.

We'll see...

In 3-4 years time I may be playing the size game and I might have to eat these words! LOL

I've got a complex..... I wasn't happy at 175..... wasn't happy at 200..... wasn't happy at 220..... now sitting close to 250 and i'm MUCH MUCH happier. I'm not happy unless i'm eating chicken and rice, lifting heavy as shit, trying to get bigger.....

I'm sure all of that will change one day but I havn't even stepped on stage yet so i've got a lot to try to conquer before i get tired of this. I am breathing heavier tho LOL but it happenes everytime I add weight..... then my body gets used to it and i'm fine.

~Haz~

[D7M]

What kind of life is walking around at 240lbs feeling like utter shit? Its not IMHO.

Get down to a weight you feel comfortable at and start to love life again.

You could die an unhappy man if you were to get hit by a bus tomorrow on the way to work.

I'll never let a hobby, lifestyle, whatever you want to call it, make me feel like shit, be tired and unhappy 24/7.

F*ck that.

Well said...100% agree.

[Swifto]

Well said...100% agree.

I read it back and thought...

Well may be a bird.

H aha ha... YOU know what I mean!

[bruary17]

Your not alone. So many guys feel the same way- chasing size. Yearning to be th "big guy." It all comes down to you, I know I chased size for years, now getting a little older and I just to be muscular and lean. Not sure how old you are NVR, but I thing you just reach that realization after time. I'm the smallest one out of most of my friends bt I can out run and ot cardio any of them. I'm healthy. I got wind. take pride in that. Maybe you've just yet to reach that point. Hope you find a center medium, man. 'cause right now, you are unhappy.

[dec11]

i too cant be arsed with the incessant eating, ive got myself to a nice maintainable 217lbs after losing alot of lean weight mid summer (dont ask!!) and at 5'9 12% bf, i reckon its enuf, usually if i tip over 224lbs im well out of my comfort eating zone and it just pisses me off fitting in the time and effort to eat. i'll poss concentrate on lowering bf now, at 35 i couldnt give a toss about being king kong anymore

[Knockout_Power]

I want to be fat again... its so much easier to eat and train for that goal...

[spoken_truth]

I want to be fat again... its so much easier to eat and train for that goal...

do it and then post your diet so i can follow it haha

[DSM4Life]

Well, Im nowhere near where you are but I am having this debate right now. How much do I want to even maintain my current mass let alone another 10 more lbs. The extra eating, the food bill, the future gear bills, the strict dieting and training while on cycle... Im not sure if its something I really want to do. I have other hobbies that I would like to direct my time and money towards and since I have no ambition to step on stage, why do I keep doing this?

You being even bigger and further into your developement, Im not sure where you find the enthusiasm and dedication to keep pushing forward year after year...

just my $0.02

-KP

I am in the same boat which is why i don't/won't cycle anymore. I am not that dedicated anymore. I see family and friends as more important than being a gym rat and eating on time. Don't get me wrong i love working out but it no longer runs my life.

[desizon]

You just gotta figure out what you want. What is going to make you happy in life? Because that's what it's all about. If you're not happy with what you're doing, change it up bro. Maybe take a break, and it could come back to you in time. Just do it for yourself.

[NVR2BIG1]

thank you very much for everybody's replies, much appreciated. Ok, well here is where I'm at with this. As of right now I'm clean for the past 8 wks, will go another 4 wks clean. When I get my CJC-1295 and my GHRP-2 I'm going to start with 1000 mg/wk CJC-1295 instead of the 2000/wk I was going to do. I'm going to keep the test at 750 mg, since I'll be using roughly 300-350mg/wk dbol. I'd like to keep it a gram/wk total on everything. I'm holding off on insulin until I feel like I need it. My test levels are probably responsible for me debating all of this in my head right now. I'm def an HRT guy, I was just trying to come off for 2-3 months to clean out those receptors. But on the other hand, holding 240 lbs clean is an accomplishment in itself, I know when I get back on I should take off again. I think what I'd really like to do though is take things a little slower, and just turn this 240 lbs 5'9" into a good quality 225 lbs. A Mike Mentzer look if you will. Part of the reason I'm so fatigued is my test count I know it is. Rather than all of these whopper gains I'm going for, I'd like to keep things slow and steady now. I think over time it'll pay off more, and save the joints. Thanx again everyone!!!

[Dont wanna be old]

thank you very much for everybody's replies, much appreciated. Ok, well here is where I'm at with this. As of right now I'm clean for the past 8 wks, will go another 4 wks clean. When I get my CJC-1295 and my GHRP-2 I'm going to start with 1000 mg/wk CJC-1295 instead of the 2000/wk I was going to do. I'm going to keep the test at 750 mg, since I'll be using roughly 300-350mg/wk dbol. I'd like to keep it a gram/wk total on everything. I'm holding off on insulin until I feel like I need it. My test levels are probably responsible for me debating all of this in my head right now. I'm def an HRT guy, I was just trying to come off for 2-3 months to clean out those receptors. But on the other hand, holding 240 lbs clean is an accomplishment in itself, I know when I get back on I should take off again. I think what I'd really like to do though is take things a little slower, and just turn this 240 lbs 5'9" into a good quality 225 lbs. A Mike Mentzer look if you will. Part of the reason I'm so fatigued is my test count I know it is. Rather than all of these whopper gains I'm going for, I'd like to keep things slow and steady now. I think over time it'll pay off more, and save the joints. Thanx again everyone!!!

Could your "not well being feel" be from shorter days ? I think sunset is 6:40 today . I have been struggling finding motivation .
Did you ever feel better using Deca ? Not sure if that's advantageous of your lean plan .

Good luck and keep your chin up .
With great strength comes great responsibility !
Don't wanna be old .

[lovbyts]

Could your "not well being feel" be from shorter days ? I think sunset is 6:40 today . I have been struggling finding motivation .
Did you ever feel better using Deca ? Not sure if that's advantageous of your lean plan .

Good luck and keep your chin up .
With great strength comes great responsibility !
Don't wanna be old .

Good possibility, we all need to start upping our Vit D, especially us who live on the West Coast where we can pretty much expect overcast skies for the next 5 months.

[NVR2BIG1]

Could your "not well being feel" be from shorter days ? I think sunset is 6:40 today . I have been struggling finding motivation .
Did you ever feel better using Deca ? Not sure if that's advantageous of your lean plan .

Good luck and keep your chin up .
With great strength comes great responsibility !
Don't wanna be old .

thought about that, I think the routine I was doing was knocking me down. I was doing German Volume Strength Training, now although I made some gains I dont think it was the right time for a routine like that being about 8 wks post cycle. I have since switched to DC training keeping my workouts more brief and I'm starting to feel better. The volume was not helping the test levels at all before. I feel much better now. Anyways, I have my next cycle on its way and definitely not coming off test anymore. I was using HRT throughout most the year, just tried to come off to clean my receptors out, rough idea, haha

[Peace Missile]

lol...

[MACHINE5150]

what kind of life is walking around at 240lbs feeling like utter shit? Its not imho.

Get down to a weight you feel comfortable at and start to love life again.

You could die an unhappy man if you were to get hit by a bus tomorrow on the way to work.

I'll never let a hobby, lifestyle, whatever you want to call it, make me feel like shit, be tired and unhappy 24/7.

F*ck that.

^^^^^x2

[dec11]

Could your "not well being feel" be from shorter days ? I think sunset is 6:40 today . I have been struggling finding motivation .
Did you ever feel better using Deca ? Not sure if that's advantageous of your lean plan .

Good luck and keep your chin up .
With great strength comes great responsibility !
Don't wanna be old .

i find SAD to be a crock of crap, i mean what was the excuse before the conitation was dreamed up, and beamed to the nations via the media?

[tjax03]

i find SAD to be a crock of crap, i mean what was the excuse before the conitation was dreamed up, and beamed to the nations via the media?

Cmon, just because it doesn't affect you doesn't mean its not a real syndrome. Take a look at the pages of research on Pubmed dealing with the disorder. You might as well just claim that depression doesn't exist at all with your argument.

[calgarian]

you should do it for urself and no one else....if u r not enjoying it fvck that and just get down to where u feel comfortable.