Need Help NOW!!

[mrfixor]

Need Help NOW!!
let me start with this: im 45years old. i was needing some help to get back into shape, mentally and physically. so i started my first cut cycle about 6 mths ago. i have an aquantance from the gym who hooked me up with everything i needed.
anivar 50mgs a day
trenbolone 200 mgs week
test prop 100 mgs eod
hgh 1 iu daily
10 week cycle
no pct - my aquantance said i shouldnt need it.

all went very well, lost fat, gained muscle felt incredible
took 5 weeks off meds but still in gym
decided that went so well i would do a bulk cycle thru the winter and then cut again come early spring. so i went back to my source and got a new cycle.
anadrol for 2weeks
deca 400 mgs per week
dyna tabs 50 mgs per day
hgh igf2 lr3 -1 iu day
test prop 150 mgs eod
started great, showing great, feeling like a bull in heat!!!

my source told me that at my age i could probably get my test from a t-clinic or my doc. so i went in had blood work done. i leveled with the doc, told him everything i was doing. he said ok as long as i felt ok. bloodwork showed my test was low, so my doc gave me test cypianate and said the i should keep up with 3 shots a week at 100mg per shot. still feeling great, bull in heat, wife loves my libido.
so i went back in a month for blood work again. now test is way too high. doc says cut it back to .75mgs 3 times a week.

about this time my stress level and anxiety goes thru the roof. i have stopped everything now. yes cold turkey. its been about 4 weeks. my anxiety is terrible. i cant hardly sleep due to it. my world seems upside down!!
i cant seem to take anything to calm down, it all freaks me out!!! my body functions are even out of wack. i need some advice please, maybe pct or get back on test only. before you vets tell me how i shouldnt have done this or i should have read more. just remmember you started somewhere too. Can some one give me some kind of advice not just an ass whippin.
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update: it sounds like im definately in a crash! remmember im already off for 4 weeks: is it too late to take an AI or serm, from what ive read, they only block while im dosing. Do yall recommend getting back on test and then slowly coming down or pct (nolvedex)????????
By the way thanks for any advice, i didnt know where else to go!

[MBMETC]

were you a candidate for trt?
you can run a pct, sounds like depression could be from the 19nor's you ran
clomid and nolva
clomid 100/100/50/50/50
nolva 40/40/20/20/20
see how it goes hopefuly all works out and 2 months after pct get a full panel run to make sure youve recovered.

[dosXX]

are you taking other medication besides test?

[TestAce]

You're 45 years old, you should of known that not performing proper and thorough research about something that can change the course of your life forever could have dire consequences. I mean come on man, you didn't run a PCT the first go around and it sounds like you didn't run one after this last cycle either.

With that said, get bloodwork done, it's the only way to find out what is screwed up.

[mrfixor]

i was. deca - dyna - hgh igf2 - pre work out N.O. shotgun, post work out N.O. synthesize, full vitamin pack daily, protien shake afternoon, good diet.
im not taking anything right now - EVERYTHING MESSES WITH MY HEAD. im not sure if im depressed or anxiety feels like both at the same time. I JUST WANT TO FEEL NORMAL!
stil not sure weahter to try pct or go back to test at small dosage. please advise??????