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Thread: Taking woman to bed

  1. 03-30-2011, 09:17 AM #1
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    Taking woman to bed

    TAKING A WOMAN TO BED


    What is the difference between girls/women aged:
    8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68, and 78 ?



    At 8 -- You take her to bed and tell her a story.




    At 18 -- You tell her a story and take her to bed.






    At 28 -- You don't need to tell her a story to take her to bed.







    At 38 -- She tells you a story and takes you to bed.







    At 48 -- She tells you a story to avoid going to bed.





    At 58 -- You stay in bed to avoid her story.







    At 68 -- If you take her to bed, that'll be a story!







    At 78 -- What story??? What bed??? Who the hell are you???
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  2. 03-30-2011, 09:33 AM #2
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    and for men? hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
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  3. 03-30-2011, 09:49 AM #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    and for men? hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
    y dont u tell us?
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  4. 03-30-2011, 10:09 AM #4
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    For men it is all the same: look at them and they are ready for bed.
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  5. 03-30-2011, 10:13 AM #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by JohnnyVegas View Post
    For men it is all the same: look at them and they are ready for bed.
    they get me at "Hi" while my back is towards them
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  6. 03-30-2011, 10:19 AM #6
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    ^^^Good one
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  7. 03-30-2011, 10:39 AM #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    y dont u tell us?
    with no extras? as in Viagra, Cialis, Test C, Test P or Test E?

    8.....loves any story

    18.... "can't think" at all for any story

    28....makes up any 'ole story to suit his purpose

    38....he starts to wonder about his story

    48....he despises his story

    58....he tries to remember his story

    68.....his story is a mirage

    78.....his story is kaput

    88....he is the story
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  8. 03-30-2011, 10:40 AM #8
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    as long he gets what he is after
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  9. 03-30-2011, 11:01 AM #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    with no extras? as in Viagra, Cialis, Test C, Test P or Test E?

    8.....loves any story

    18.... "can't think" at all for any story

    28....makes up any 'ole story to suit his purpose

    38....he starts to wonder about his story

    48....he despises his story

    58....he tries to remember his story

    68.....his story is a mirage

    78.....his story is kaput

    88....he is the story
    heh, this is very true... but you left out one critical part... somewhere around age 38 you should add "his stories about past experiences get exaggerated"
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  10. 03-30-2011, 11:03 AM #10
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    just to clarify...i dont tell them stories...picture of cheese cake or tripple stack beef burger get them in the mood. and they are ready for any "kind" of "meat"
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  11. 03-30-2011, 11:04 AM #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    just to clarify...i dont tell them stories...picture of cheese cake or tripple stack beef burger get them in the mood. and they are ready for any "kind" of "meat"
    I just got excited
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  12. 03-30-2011, 11:07 AM #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    I just got excited
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  13. 03-30-2011, 11:54 AM #13
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    Creamy cake will work anytime anywhere.....smart man you are Cal!
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  14. 03-30-2011, 01:24 PM #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    Creamy cake will work anytime anywhere.....smart man you are Cal!
    thank you mam......burger trick only work for certain ppl.
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  15. 03-30-2011, 01:38 PM #15
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    I like a good bed time story
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  16. 03-30-2011, 02:32 PM #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by songdog View Post
    I like a good bed time story
    make sure dsm doesnt know abt it
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  17. 03-30-2011, 03:05 PM #17
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    creamy cake huh? What about a creampie?
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  18. 03-31-2011, 02:13 AM #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    creamy cake huh? What about a creampie?
    hahaha that was going to be my comment. Glad I read to the bottom (pun intended).
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  19. 03-31-2011, 04:40 AM #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    with no extras? as in Viagra, Cialis, Test C, Test P or Test E?

    8.....loves any story

    18.... "can't think" at all for any story

    28....makes up any 'ole story to suit his purpose

    38....he starts to wonder about his story

    48....he despises his story

    58....he tries to remember his story

    68.....his story is a mirage

    78.....his story is kaput

    88....he is the story
    HEY!!!

    This puts me in an unsavory category!
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  20. 03-31-2011, 05:37 AM #20
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  21. 03-31-2011, 05:43 AM #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    HEY!!!

    This puts me in an unsavory category!
    Dont worry, with the advances in HRT you shouldn't be Kaput for long.
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  22. 03-31-2011, 07:02 AM #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by lovbyts View Post
    Dont worry, with the advances in HRT you shouldn't be Kaput for long.
    I think we should change this

    from:
    48....he despises his story

    to:
    48....horny as fuk
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  23. 03-31-2011, 10:08 AM #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    I think we should change this

    from:
    48....he despises his story

    to:
    48....horny as fuk
    note: I said without any Test .......but with? WATCH OUT! MOVE OVER ROVER!
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  24. 03-31-2011, 10:09 AM #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    creamy cake huh? What about a creampie?
    Cream Pie? yummy...that will work~
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  25. 03-31-2011, 10:25 AM #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    Cream Pie? yummy...that will work~
    awww, now I actually feel bad for posting that... you are too cute and innocent
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  26. 03-31-2011, 10:28 AM #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    awww, now I actually feel bad for posting that... you are too cute and innocent
    Maybe I am innocent....I do not see anything "bad" about cream pie other than a lot of calories!
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  27. 03-31-2011, 10:32 AM #27
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    NOT that kind of cream pie sweetie
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  28. 03-31-2011, 10:47 AM #28
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    Slimmer....??? Cream pie isn't a pastry
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  29. 03-31-2011, 10:50 AM #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    Maybe I am innocent....I do not see anything "bad" about cream pie other than a lot of calories!
    yup, you be a sweetie, thats for sure...

    go to google images and type in Creampie...
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  30. 03-31-2011, 10:59 AM #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    yup, you be a sweetie, thats for sure...

    go to google images and type in Creampie...
    why would you tell her that? Slimmer is pure and innocent. she doesn't need to be corrupted by that!
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  31. 03-31-2011, 11:21 AM #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    why would you tell her that? Slimmer is pure and innocent. she doesn't need to be corrupted by that!
    she's a sweetheart, but still a member and therefore should not be excluded from any discussion unless she so chooses =P
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  32. 03-31-2011, 11:24 AM #32
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    sure... get technical on me!
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  33. 03-31-2011, 11:26 AM #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    Maybe I am innocent....I do not see anything "bad" about cream pie other than a lot of calories!
    Quote Originally Posted by Kawigirl View Post
    NOT that kind of cream pie sweetie
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  34. 03-31-2011, 11:30 AM #34
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    you guys take it easy on Slimmer.... she aint rude, crude and obnoxious like the rest of us!
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  35. 03-31-2011, 11:38 AM #35
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    SlimmerMe's "Cutting" Creamiest Cream Pie Recipe:

    28 egg whites

    Blend just a bit but not too much since you want to keep the texture

    Remove from blender

    Note: No crust since trying to "cut" and not gain

    Pour blended cream directly into mouth and swallow for savory creamy delight

    and for those who want to gain, add a bit of hand-made whipped cream~

    Enjoy!
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  36. 03-31-2011, 11:41 AM #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    SlimmerMe's "Cutting" Creamiest Cream Pie Recipe:

    28 egg whites

    Blend just a bit but not too much since you want to keep the texture

    Remove from blender

    Note: No crust since trying to "cut" and not gain

    Pour blended cream directly into mouth and swallow for savory creamy delight

    and for those who want to gain, add a bit of hand-made whipped cream~

    Enjoy!
    that's what I love about you Slimmer.... you only see the pure and the good! =)

    Please don't change, k?
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  37. 03-31-2011, 11:42 AM #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    SlimmerMe's "Cutting" Creamiest Cream Pie Recipe:

    28 egg whites

    Blend just a bit but not too much since you want to keep the texture

    Remove from blender

    Note: No crust since trying to "cut" and not gain

    Pour blended cream directly into mouth and swallow for savory creamy delight

    and for those who want to gain, add a bit of hand-made whipped cream~

    Enjoy!
    honey...if u r that innocent u r in the wrong forum ......but good to know
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  38. 03-31-2011, 11:47 AM #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by calgarian View Post
    honey...if u r that innocent u r in the wrong forum ......but good to know
    she's in the right place....
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  39. 03-31-2011, 11:49 AM #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlimmerMe View Post
    SlimmerMe's "Cutting" Creamiest Cream Pie Recipe:

    28 egg whites

    Blend just a bit but not too much since you want to keep the texture

    Remove from blender

    Note: No crust since trying to "cut" and not gain

    Pour blended cream directly into mouth and swallow for savory creamy delight

    and for those who want to gain, add a bit of hand-made whipped cream~

    Enjoy!
    toucheé... see, intelligence can combat us perv's anytime
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  40. 03-31-2011, 02:50 PM #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by Knockout_Power View Post
    toucheé... see, intelligence can combat us perv's anytime
    also giving me cpl of great ideas.........
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