hahaha naa, need to be nice to the newbies who are visiting Thailand for the 1st time. There is a good chance they will be confused enough on who is who or what without anyone pointing them in the wrong direction.
We have a few members on here who are currently living in Thailand and a few ex pats who I'm sure can help more than me. A lot of my information is a little dated since it's been 3 years since my last visit.

I'm trying to convince the Mrs. to let me go to a FRIENDS wedding coming up soon but I think my chanses are about the same as talking her into the 2 twin Asian girls I want to adopt. Why does it matter they are almost 16?? lol
I regress. Best thing is while there join one of the local gyms. FYI do not do a long term contract. Pay week to week, not a month up front and 100% get a receipt. You can be like most people and just walk into any pharmacy and ask what they have or know in advance what you are looking for. Like everywhere there are a lot of fakes so be sure to know what you are looking for. It's best if you can hook up with someone local who obviously knows what they are doing.
Enjoy your time in Pattaya. Dont drink to much, dont do anything stupid, NEVER get into a fight with a Thai because you will fight the who village (every Thai in sight will join in) and it does not matter if you are in the right or wrong. Don't flash money or jewelery, especially jewelery. There have been a big increase of robberies in broad daylight and a lot of small groups who ride scooters and drive by and snatch what you have in your hand or around your neck.
There are usually a lot of Ausies who are around town or sitting in the pubs so you should have no problem meeting some locals. As said watch out for the lady boys (unless that's what you are looking for) because sometimes its very hard to tell the difference. Most of the time it's obvious but not always. Another good reason not to get drunk. lol
Remember in Thailand you never pay for sex. You pay for the taxi ride home in the morning.

I had to pay for 2 taxi fares last time.
