Need Bedtime Story

[Papa Smurf]

Hello guys and gals.............. 11:32 pm Eastern standard time and here I am sleepless in NC......................again!!!

Cycle going as planed, but this tired and cant sleep BS is getting old fast....

So............. since Im up.............and so are you..............its story time!!!


Tonights poll:

How old were you when (you no, keeping it clean) and how old was your first partner?

I'll Start

Me 15
Her 15

[sixfootseven]

Me 19
Her: idk lol

[ChiveOn]

Me 17th bday
Her 16

[lovbyts]

It all depends on what you consider 1st...
It could be
me 7, her 16
me 8, her 8
me 18, her 15
Ill stop there..

[TheClinch]

Me 12
Her 15

[Papa Smurf]

It all depends on what you consider 1st...
It could be
me 7, her 16
me 8, her 8
me 18, her 15
Ill stop there..

How did I know, with you, there would be multiples!!!

[MuscleInk]

It all depends on what you consider 1st...
It could be
me 7, her 16
me 8, her 8
me 18, her 15
Ill stop there..

7!?!?!?!

Jesus. I don't think I had even started touching myself at 7!!!!!!!!

[TheClinch]

7!?!?!?!

Jesus. I don't think I had even started touching myself at 7!!!!!!!!

Yeah give a detail luv...what the hell were you up to at 7?

[Papa Smurf]

Yeah give a detail luv...what the hell were you up to at 7?

My guess ORAL but Im just guessing

[TheClinch]

Feel up

[lovbyts]

7!?!?!?!

Jesus. I don't think I had even started touching myself at 7!!!!!!!!

I wasnt touching my self either but I had some help. lol
You know how those church girl baby sitters are. I just wish I could remember ALL the details.
In no way was it unpleasant though. I was just very shy and embarrassed but remember feeling protective of her after like a girlfriend and getting jealous when an older boy would talk to her. lol

[Papa Smurf]

Feel up

Normal guy, yes you would be correct..................but remember who were talking about!

[MuscleInk]

I wasnt touching my self either but I had some help. lol
You know how those church girl baby sitters are. I just wish I could remember ALL the details.
In no way was it unpleasant though. I was just very shy and embarrassed but remember feeling protective of her after like a girlfriend and getting jealous when an older boy would talk to her. lol

Damn. I knew I should have gone to church!!!!!

[Papa Smurf]

I wasnt touching my self either but I had some help. lol
You know how those church girl baby sitters are. I just wish I could remember ALL the details.
In no way was it unpleasant though. I was just very shy and embarrassed but remember feeling protective of her after like a girlfriend and getting jealous when an older boy would talk to her. lol

Wow bro..................I think you were molested as a child................ That explains alot...................should we call Special Victims Unit?

[MuscleInk]

Wow bro..................I think you were molested as a child................ That explains alot...................should we call Special Victims Unit?

Molested at 7 and now he's having orgies in Thailand!?!?!

Suddenly I'm wishing I was molested. Lol

[TheClinch]

Normal guy, yes you would be correct..................but remember who were talking about!

Well there you have it, at least it was a girl in church this time. Dodged a bullet luv! Lol

[dan991]

'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The forum was dead, and Girly was in heat,
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.

Electra in her teddy, and I in the nude
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner and poor Electra went dry.

Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while Girly played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman of 405 we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With Lunk as the driver, half out of his sled,
A sock on his ear, and a bra on his head.

Sure as I'm speaking, Lunk was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Marcus, whoa Kel, whoa Cape, whoa Austinite,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.

Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Gixxer leaned out and threw up on my shrub.

And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each one of the mods now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Bear came with a crash.

His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.

He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then Shlova whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, Girly smiled with glee,
That old Shlova was hung nearly down to his knee.

Back in the den, Bear reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.

The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.

A box filled with condoms was Bears next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that DSM wouldn't even mention.

A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Bear will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."

He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.

In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Admin, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Bear shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!"

[TheClinch]

'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The forum was dead, and Girly was in heat,
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.

Electra in her teddy, and I in the nude
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner and poor Electra went dry.

Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while Girly played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman of 405 we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With Lunk as the driver, half out of his sled,
A sock on his ear, and a bra on his head.

Sure as I'm speaking, Lunk was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Marcus, whoa Kel, whoa Cape, whoa Austinite,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.

Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Gixxer leaned out and threw up on my shrub.

And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each one of the mods now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Bear came with a crash.

His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.

He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then Shlova whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, Girly smiled with glee,
That old Shlova was hung nearly down to his knee.

Back in the den, Bear reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.

The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.

A box filled with condoms was Bears next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that DSM wouldn't even mention.

A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Bear will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."

He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.

In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Admin, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Bear shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!"

Bravo...little early in the season but nonetheless haha

[dan991]

Bravo...little early in the season but nonetheless haha

Meh... he wanted a bed time story. Best I can do.

[Papa Smurf]

'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The forum was dead, and Girly was in heat,
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.

Electra in her teddy, and I in the nude
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner and poor Electra went dry.

Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while Girly played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman of 405 we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With Lunk as the driver, half out of his sled,
A sock on his ear, and a bra on his head.

Sure as I'm speaking, Lunk was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Marcus, whoa Kel, whoa Cape, whoa Austinite,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.

Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Gixxer leaned out and threw up on my shrub.

And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each one of the mods now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Bear came with a crash.

His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.

He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then Shlova whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, Girly smiled with glee,
That old Shlova was hung nearly down to his knee.

Back in the den, Bear reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.

The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.

A box filled with condoms was Bears next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that DSM wouldn't even mention.

A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Bear will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."

He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.

In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Admin, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Bear shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!"

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (rubbing eyes) Thanks Dan............................your the best!!! night night

[MuscleInk]

'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The forum was dead, and Girly was in heat,
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.

Electra in her teddy, and I in the nude
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner and poor Electra went dry.

Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while Girly played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman of 405 we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With Lunk as the driver, half out of his sled,
A sock on his ear, and a bra on his head.

Sure as I'm speaking, Lunk was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Marcus, whoa Kel, whoa Cape, whoa Austinite,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.

Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Gixxer leaned out and threw up on my shrub.

And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each one of the mods now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Bear came with a crash.

His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.

He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then Shlova whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, Girly smiled with glee,
That old Shlova was hung nearly down to his knee.

Back in the den, Bear reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.

The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.

A box filled with condoms was Bears next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that DSM wouldn't even mention.

A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Bear will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."

He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.

In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Admin, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Bear shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!"

That was genius!

[lovbyts]

Wow bro..................I think you were molested as a child................ That explains alot...................should we call Special Victims Unit?

I will deny, deny deny.... I want to beat the crap out of those kids who told on their teachers.

I need to edit my above post. I forgot about one.
Me 6, her 6
She instigated everyting and always wanted to play in the woods and play doctor all the time. lol

[ChiveOn]

It all depends on what you consider 1st...
It could be
me 7, her 16
me 8, her 8
me 18, her 15
Ill stop there..

Wtf?! When I was 7 girls still had cooties. Idk if my nuts had even dropped then lol

[ElectraMaddox]

'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The forum was dead, and Girly was in heat,
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.

Electra in her teddy, and I in the nude
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner and poor Electra went dry.

Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while Girly played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman of 405 we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With Lunk as the driver, half out of his sled,
A sock on his ear, and a bra on his head.

Sure as I'm speaking, Lunk was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Marcus, whoa Kel, whoa Cape, whoa Austinite,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.

Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Gixxer leaned out and threw up on my shrub.

And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each one of the mods now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Bear came with a crash.

His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.

He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then Shlova whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, Girly smiled with glee,
That old Shlova was hung nearly down to his knee.

Back in the den, Bear reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.

The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.

A box filled with condoms was Bears next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that DSM wouldn't even mention.

A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Bear will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."

He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.

In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Admin, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Bear shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!"

You have too much free time!

[gixxerboy1]

i was 15
she was 19

[Bigshotvictoria]

Well there you have it, at least it was a girl in church this time. Dodged a bullet luv! Lol

Touched in a church?

Thats never happened before...

[cherrydrpepper]

First wet dream Pamela Anderson probably around when I was 12

First intercourse both 17

[Bigshotvictoria]

Me 15, her 14. She also happened to be a squirter. Imagine my surprise when I found out not all girls did that!!!

[warmouth]

Me 15, her 14. She also happened to be a squirter. Imagine my surprise when I found out not all girls did that!!!

At least she wasnt a farter!

[Bigshotvictoria]

At least she wasnt a farter!

I was 15, she could have sharted on my balls and I wouldn't have stopped.

[warmouth]

I was 15, she could have sharted on my balls and I wouldn't have stopped.

Lol. Understood for sure. I was 14, she was 51.

[Bigshotvictoria]

Lol. Understood for sure. I was 14, she was 51.

did i read this right, or am i dyslexic!?!

[ElectraMaddox]

did i read this right, or am i dyslexic!?!

Haaaa

[frank13]

13 14

[warmouth]

did i read this right, or am i dyslexic!?!

Ha ha. I was joking and switched her numbers. She was 15.

[cherrydrpepper]

I never jerked off as a kid. Anyway, the first time I ever came not counting wet dreams was when I stuck it in a girl at 17. I think I got half a stroke before the volcano erupted. That was probably the fasted sex session in the history of intercourse.

[Papa Smurf]

Need another story................. DAN !!!!!!! were are you bro!

[ElectraMaddox]

Need another story................. DAN !!!!!!! were are you bro!

He's m.i.a. That story was creative for sure

[Hunter]

I was 15 and she was in 15. In the hay loft of our horse barn.

[dan991]

Need another story................. DAN !!!!!!! were are you bro!

Sorry- I can't do this shit every night. Good ol' Jack influenced me into it!