testosterone addiction

[aurelian87]

started my first cycle 16 days ago, pinned only 5 times but i can't stop thinking about the next injection, first one hurt so bad, the others i didn't even notice any pain, i don't have the patience to wait 3.5 days, what the hell will i do when my 14 week cycle is over? suicide? no bs i feel very hooked on this stuff, very powerful substance.. i take 500 mg/week test. enth. from balkan pharma. my first plan was a 12 week cycle but ordered some more today with the clomid

[TheTaxMan]

Treat it with respect or you will potentially ruin yourself

Yes it is addictive like most substances are!

Be careful use but dont abuse!

[LordGains]

I'm pretty sure your not the only one but like the guy above said , use but don't abuse.

[djgreen]

I was excited at first when I started to get it in and see results but trust me pinning gets old quick

[poppz]

I confess,i look forward to the pin...

[< <Samson> >]

I confess,i look forward to the pin...

I can't say that I am

But, I am looking forward to how I feel from it. Specially when my cycle is real heavy.

[redz]

Sounds like you would like short esters if you like pinning.

[thephoenix25]

Yep me too, first cycle during the first few weeks I was counting the hours till the next shot. The excitement of something new fades over time, by the end of my first cycle the shots were more of a nuisance, it was the effects in the gym and the risk of over training that was my problem.

Nobody enjoys coming off cycle, period. But you can use the off time to actively reflect on what went well, what didn't, how you could improve on your protocol, this is why a personal log is very useful, I still have all my logs and frequently check them to compare results, timings and effects. Enjoy the process but accept it for what it is, a temporary window of opportunity that should be taken advantage of but never abused.

[< <Samson> >]

Sounds like you would like short esters if you like pinning.

Yeah, in my spike happy days I'd take 2 shots a day sometimes

One for my daily & one for my preworkout TNE

[Euroholic]

Nothing like synthetic testosterone!!!!!! i have always been jealous of the blokes who are on legit trt and can buy it legally while i have to forage for mine. I buy

[Red Bastard]

I confess, I love the pin too... And some blood, when I nick one, on the way in or out...
There's always B12 shots, that you can do, while off cycle...

[PT]

Your only 16 days in. Try doing 6 months of eod primo injections and I guarantee by the end you won't want to even look at another needle

[Bonaparte]

It'll become a chore very quickly.

[NACH3]

As mentioned already - I used to pin ed and run prop for that reason - but after a couple cycles it fades... Quick too! I'm actually running long esters and enjoy the time between pins now...

I think we've all been there in one way or another(regarding the excitement etc) I used to look forward to ed pinning - it's not bad - but surely an inconvenience -

You said you ordered more?? Don't extend your cycle on your first one - do it as planned and what were you going to do w/the extra gear - wait for next time right?!

[bsh]

God I miss being on cycle!!!

[Ashop]

I don't think its addictive at all. Its all in your head,,,possibly a little OCD?

[RangerDanger830]

While Testosterone is not biologically addictive do not underestimate the possibility for behavioral addiction. Many people have it, especially with AAS. Some examples of behavioral addiction are shopping, hoarding, and Internet overuse.

This type of addiction can just as effectively ruin your life and your body. Although what you feel isn't too unusual, keep this in mind for later on down the road.

Here is an interesting read on the concept...


http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3354400/

[edmondle]

As mentioned already - I used to pin ed and run prop for that reason - but after a couple cycles it fades... Quick too! I'm actually running long esters and enjoy the time between pins now... I think we've all been there in one way or another(regarding the excitement etc) I used to look forward to ed pinning - it's not bad - but surely an inconvenience - You said you ordered more?? Don't extend your cycle on your first one - do it as planned and what were you going to do w/the extra gear - wait for next time right?!

I'm like 14 weeks in, but I still shake when I pin myself ??

[NACH3]

I'm like 14 weeks in, but I still shake when I pin myself ??

Do you have any anxiety problems normally? It should fade - and most likely will w/time - why do you think your feeling this? Can you explain a lil further?!

[ambernightly]

I'm like 14 weeks in, but I still shake when I pin myself ??

If I'm doing more than one injection per day (ie: I don't typically enjoy putting more than 1.5ml into any site at a time) or for various other reasons that cause my hands to shake, then I take 20mg of Propranolol and then I'm nice and steady. Surgeons take it (or other beta blockers) for this specific reason. Highly recommend it for pinning, especially if you're on any stimulants that may add to tremors. Also helps to focus on breathing while pinning - same methods used for long distance marksmanship trigger pulls is good.



Regarding Propranolol: "As judged by the resident surgeon, there was a highly significant effect of propranolol in decreasing anxiety (P = .0058), reducing surgical tremor overall (P < .0001), and reducing tremor while placing the first 3 sutures following lens extraction (P < .0001)."
* The effect of propranolol versus placebo on resident surgical performance.


Regarding 'Breath Control': "The first technique is used during zeroing (and when time is available to fire a shot). There is a moment of natural respiratory pause while breathing when most of the air has been exhaled from the lungs and before inhaling. Breathing should stop after most of the air has been exhaled during the normal breathing cycle. The shot must be fired before the soldier feels any discomfort."
* Four Fundamentals of Marksmanship (ArmyStudyGuide.com)

[NACH3]

If I'm doing more than one injection per day (ie: I don't typically enjoy putting more than 1.5ml into any site at a time) or for various other reasons that cause my hands to shake, then I take 20mg of Propranolol and then I'm nice and steady. Surgeons take it (or other beta blockers) for this specific reason. Highly recommend it for pinning, especially if you're on any stimulants that may add to tremors. Also helps to focus on breathing while pinning - same methods used for long distance marksmanship trigger pulls is good.



Regarding Propranolol: "As judged by the resident surgeon, there was a highly significant effect of propranolol in decreasing anxiety (P = .0058), reducing surgical tremor overall (P < .0001), and reducing tremor while placing the first 3 sutures following lens extraction (P < .0001)."
* The effect of propranolol versus placebo on resident surgical performance.


Regarding 'Breath Control': "The first technique is used during zeroing (and when time is available to fire a shot). There is a moment of natural respiratory pause while breathing when most of the air has been exhaled from the lungs and before inhaling. Breathing should stop after most of the air has been exhaled during the normal breathing cycle. The shot must be fired before the soldier feels any discomfort."
* Four Fundamentals of Marksmanship (ArmyStudyGuide.com)

Hey Ambernightly,

I have very bad anxiety/panic attacks etc - I'll wake up from a dream in like I'm gasping for air - and feel very overwhelmed and I won't even remember the dream except for trying to wake myself up(if that makes sense - I can actually tell when I'm in a dream and come out of it)

I read the study on Propranolol - would you think this would help or aid in my case - and would I start w/40mgs as they did in the study?? How much do you take(note saw 20mgs) but how often - daily?? Thx!

[free_at_last]

[QUOTE=NACH3;7091981]Hey Ambernightly,

I have very bad anxiety/panic attacks etc - I'll wake up from a dream in like I'm gasping for air - and feel very overwhelmed and I won't even remember the dream except for trying to wake myself up(if that makes sense - I can actually tell when I'm in a dream and come out of it)

sounds like you need to cut back on the tren, bro!! lol....all kidding aside...it's dreams like this that warn me it's time to dial back my tren dosage!

[NACH3]

[QUOTE=free_at_last;7092101]

Hey Ambernightly,

sounds like you need to cut back on the tren, bro!! lol....all kidding aside...it's dreams like this that warn me it's time to dial back my tren dosage!

^^^ hahaha - I've heard the stories about the tren dreams lol - haven't ran any, yet...

[free_at_last]

[QUOTE=NACH3;7092104]

^^^ hahaha - I've heard the stories about the tren dreams lol - haven't ran any, yet...

I find it hard to believe you've NEVER run tren with a back like that, bro! i'd hate to see what you'd look like on 75mg/ed of tren-ace!

[thephoenix25]

except for trying to wake myself up(if that makes sense - I can actually tell when I'm in a dream and come out of it)

You're to only other person I've heard of that does this, I've explained it to my friends who all look at me like I'm nuts. I get to a point in a dream where I realise "yea, this isn't real" and I can choose to wake myself up if I don't like it or continue if I do. I usually use it to get out of a bad dream, been doing this for a long time before I used steroids.

[RangerDanger830]

It happens more often than some people think.

[KA24]

The substance isn't addicting.

What you're chasing, physique, strength, looks, women, energy, etc...addicting.

If you're the kind of person who has a tendency to be a perfectionist and OCD with other things, AAS will be no different. You will simply feel more at ease once you pin and then do whatever you do to go for your goal.

[NACH3]

You're to only other person I've heard of that does this, I've explained it to my friends who all look at me like I'm nuts. I get to a point in a dream where I realise "yea, this isn't real" and I can choose to wake myself up if I don't like it or continue if I do. I usually use it to get out of a bad dream, been doing this for a long time before I used steroids.

Me too b4 using - my friends look at me like wtf?!?! Lol - It's happened to me ever since I had my car accident... Funny b/c my ex was the only other person who could do this... Nice to see I'm not crazy lmao...

I do it for the same reasons. I know when it's not real(after a certain time) and can wake myself up right out of it!

[bloodchoke]

I find it hard to believe you've NEVER run tren with a back like that, bro! i'd hate to see what you'd look like on 75mg/ed of tren-ace!

RIGHT?! He should change his username to BACH3

Re: the OP, needle craze is common in the beginning, especially with non-essential / recreational uses.

[NACH3]

[QUOTE=bloodchoke;7092290]

RIGHT?! He should change his username to BACH3

Re: the OP, needle craze is common in the beginning, especially with non-essential / recreational uses.

LOLOL funny - nutrition and training!!! Gear helps

[bloodchoke]

I'm really itching to start my next cycle. My cutting down to 15% is probably going to take at least a month longer than I thought, too. What's worse is I have everything on hand for my next cycle, PCT and all. I had to pack it all up and stash it out of sight just because it was driving me crazy to look at it every day.

[ambernightly]

Hey Ambernightly,

I have very bad anxiety/panic attacks etc - I'll wake up from a dream in like I'm gasping for air - and feel very overwhelmed and I won't even remember the dream except for trying to wake myself up(if that makes sense - I can actually tell when I'm in a dream and come out of it)

I read the study on Propranolol - would you think this would help or aid in my case - and would I start w/40mgs as they did in the study?? How much do you take(note saw 20mgs) but how often - daily?? Thx!

Oh yeah, I've had those night terrors before. Used to get them every night for about 2-3 weeks after getting out of an extended hospital stay. In my case it was a result of my brain processing a very traumatic event, basically short term PTSD. Those nightmare/terror events subsided eventually (reduced in frequency over the course of about two months) after going to therapy and changing my health related routines quite a bit.

The underlying cause is almost always stress related - either body/brain related stress from a situational issue (trauma, being consistently overworked, etc) or substance/neuro-chemical related (AAS, overuse of benzodiazepines, not tapering off of SSRI/SNRI medication, chronic use of MDMA, etc).

Re: Propranolol... I started at 20mg and went up to 40mg once I knew how my body reacted. For example: for anxiety (also good for short term treatment of hyperhydrosis) when I'm not on-cycle then 20mg is fine, if I'm on-cycle or am taking prescribed Adderall that day (but not going to the gym b/c it lowers HR by 10-20bpm and lowers BP as well) then I take 40mg. You may respond well to 10mg, or need as much as 60-80mg... it varies by patient but, like most medications, the side effect profile increases with dose. For anxiety treatment you'll want to take it every day consistently. Monitor BP and HR for the first week as you try it out - it will affect workouts so time it correctly. It's also great for spot treatment of high BP spikes (like overuse of stimulants and AAS where you need your BP down RIGHT NOW by 10 points).

[aurelian87]

feeling so good on test i just want to teleport in the future to start the next cycle at 750mg test , my body is screaming for more test
pinned last night, zero pip and its amazing.
now i'm on week 4, maybe i had low test all my life and thats why its so great for me, i don't even care about gains any more what i put on will be a bonus the psychological state it gave me is what i needed more.

[NACH3]

Oh yeah, I've had those night terrors before. Used to get them every night for about 2-3 weeks after getting out of an extended hospital stay. In my case it was a result of my brain processing a very traumatic event, basically short term PTSD. Those nightmare/terror events subsided eventually (reduced in frequency over the course of about two months) after going to therapy and changing my health related routines quite a bit.

The underlying cause is almost always stress related - either body/brain related stress from a situational issue (trauma, being consistently overworked, etc) or substance/neuro-chemical related (AAS, overuse of benzodiazepines, not tapering off of SSRI/SNRI medication, chronic use of MDMA, etc).

Re: Propranolol... I started at 20mg and went up to 40mg once I knew how my body reacted. For example: for anxiety (also good for short term treatment of hyperhydrosis) when I'm not on-cycle then 20mg is fine, if I'm on-cycle or am taking prescribed Adderall that day (but not going to the gym b/c it lowers HR by 10-20bpm and lowers BP as well) then I take 40mg. You may respond well to 10mg, or need as much as 60-80mg... it varies by patient but, like most medications, the side effect profile increases with dose. For anxiety treatment you'll want to take it every day consistently. Monitor BP and HR for the first week as you try it out - it will affect workouts so time it correctly. It's also great for spot treatment of high BP spikes (like overuse of stimulants and AAS where you need your BP down RIGHT NOW by 10 points).

Wow... Sounds like we both have had traumatic events(car accident) - and it seems Exactly what caused these episodes(or at first)... Then it became much more related to stress(since my ex and broke it off - I don't wake up like that ed... It's even gone back to maybe once a month! I was, no doubt, very stressed. Plus the adderall didn't help(was way over prescribed 120mgs a day)

The adderall and made it much worse(even had a seizure on it - safe to say I dropped it) - so it was most likely a combo of trauma/stress/& stems) & thx for the propranolol info(will do the research required, but thanks for breaking it down!

[ambernightly]

Wow... Sounds like we both have had traumatic events(car accident) - and it seems Exactly what caused these episodes(or at first)... Then it became much more related to stress(since my ex and broke it off - I don't wake up like that ed... It's even gone back to maybe once a month! I was, no doubt, very stressed. Plus the adderall didn't help(was way over prescribed 120mgs a day)

The adderall and made it much worse(even had a seizure on it - safe to say I dropped it) - so it was most likely a combo of trauma/stress/& stems) & thx for the propranolol info(will do the research required, but thanks for breaking it down!

whoa. yeah, 120mg/ED of (what I assume is) instant release Adderall would send most people to the ER. My daily limit on IR and XR is 80mg but I take 40mg XR on most days so 80 isn't too risky unless I have other stimulants or vasoconstrictors making things complicated. Best to stockpile the over-scripted Adderall and horde it if you can

Have you tried Modafinil for focus? That's a pretty good stand-in for Adderall if you only need it 1-2/week (100mg is a good start) and it isn't amphetamine based. I'm finding that fine tuning my T/E2 ratio helps more with energy and focus throughout the day more than extra stimulants... but it's a fine line to find in the broad strokes of my cycles

[michael30]

I'm like 14 weeks in, but I still shake when I pin myself ??

I've been on trt for 8-9 yrs now and to this day I still shake sometime when I do I.M injections. For some reason SQ shots aren't as bad. But I will admit I had a horrible issue with needles when I first started. Lol I had to have a few drinks before I was able to do my first shot.

[max738]

yes it can have an addictive quality to it since it's our maturing hormone and after maturity using it feels good but
like was stated don't abuse it or it can get you into serious trouble if your red blood cells get to thick that can cause
problems.I wish you well