Big decision - to TRT or not to TRT

[Jedi1337]

Hi all,

I feel as if i am at a big decision in my life around whether to go on TRT for the rest of my days. Im 33, no kids yet, FYI.

My story goes like this:

Since my late teens i have suffered from anxiety and depression. On the face of it, I have achieved alot: I finished a bachelors degree, and a masters degree (neuroscience) during that time. I trained and got a decent body naturally. Until late 2013 I had an amazing woman.

In 2013 my relationship broke down as a result of what i see now as a lack of "drive to do fun things", probably a lack a sexual interest, and my career not going anywhere. I was miserable and my social relationships where always very tenuous and I was never in the "in crowd" at work. I resented this because underneath my anxiety I wanted to have energy, I wanted to be sociable, and i 100% had the ability to take on more complicated + higher paid job positions. I just struggled with communication and building trust.


In 2014 I did my first cycle and basically my life changed forever.

Within a short space of time I was in job interviews. I was dating like never before and I suddenly had a "clarity of mind" I hadnt had for many, many years. I realised how much i had been struggling over the years with all of those things. BASIC things like being able to think straight and communicate effectively now came easily.

Fastforward to now and Ive doubled my salary, I have lots of new friends, and my employee values me very highly. I now have very little stress in my life, my ezcema has gone, I no longer get shortness of breath and my outlook on life is overwhelming positive.

In terms of roids, Ive basically been on-and-off 3 cycles over the past 24 months. First was 3 months, 2nd was 4 months, last about 4. I do around 500mg per week sust, so not huge cycles, but im finding I am stretching out the cycle length, which I know can be detrimental.


With all this change and positivity in my life I am struggling to see how i could let it all go - i.e. give up cycling. My mind is telling me, categorically, that I have a dependency issue. It is not a nice feeling.

Ive always had the option of antidepressents from the doc, or anti-anxiety drugs, but refused on the bad press they get. I didnt want to become dependent. Now I am dependent on black-market steriods .


Judge me if you want to. Tell me ive got a problem. However I feel test has given me so much "normality" in my life that perhaps I was suffering from low T in the first place. The difficulty is, though, is even though my life was miserable, if i go onto TRT I am basically kissing by to a "me" that i will never be able to get back - i.e. natty me.

I rarely train on riods now. Its really all about maintaining a positive life from a psychological point of view.


So Im looking at the 10 years+ TRT guys who can offer some advice. Im worried about long term TRT - what if it stops working for me? What if i get permanant ED? Should i go on TRT from the doc and then "cycle" to keep the option of going back?


Thoughts appreciated.

[hammerheart]

Cool story. What are your natural test levels?

[Jedi1337]

errr.... working on that....

Going to docs in a month. 2 months out from my last cycle.

[CobraMustangSVT]

Since you're 33, you're not looking at 10+ years of TRT, you're looking at the rest of your life. TRT isn't a cycle, it's a lifetime commitment.

[Jedi1337]

Agreed. But i want to understand if in 10 years time im gonna lose my boners or if it loses efficacy.

I understand TRT is for life, but if you cycled it it wouldnt necessarily be.

For me, I guess my visit to the Drs and getting a script would at least mean i am using clean gear.

[borellias]

as someone who has used 4 different antidepressants in the past, you are right to be skeptical. if I could go back in time I'd have tried something different. all I got from them were that they killed my sex drive, gave me what seems to be an abdominal distension issue and hospitalized me in one instance, all the while never having the desired effect on mood.

[hammerheart]

A couple of yrs ago I was prescribed venlafaxine but I refused it, and I'm glad I did. That sh*t is poison.

[NACH3]

Since you're 33, you're not looking at 10+ years of TRT, you're looking at the rest of your life. TRT isn't a cycle, it's a lifetime commitment.

Your right but it's changed many lives even younger than him in a much more positive way... Imho id much rather feel normal than not... Living with low T is plain ole terrible!

I was much like you OP... Similar story except mine stems from a car accident... But just like you I lost a fiancé(7yrs) but as I look back on it now we weren't meant for one another or it woulda worked. We all have our problems but after going on trt my depression/& anxiety has settled down... Still weening off my anxiety meds.

It's your life so do what you can to make it the best... And from what your describing you could very well end up a very happy person w/HRT! Just my .02 best of luck

[InternalFire]

Your right but it's changed many lives even younger than him in a much more positive way... Imho id much rather feel normal than not... Living with low T is plain ole terrible!

I was much like you OP... Similar story except mine stems from a car accident... But just like you I lost a fiancé(7yrs) but as I look back on it now we weren't meant for one another or it woulda worked. We all have our problems but after going on trt my depression/& anxiety has settled down... Still weening off my anxiety meds.

It's your life so do what you can to make it the best... And from what your describing you could very well end up a very happy person w/HRT! Just my .02 best of luck

Gold ^^^

[borellias]

A couple of yrs ago I was prescribed venlafaxine but I refused it, and I'm glad I did. That sh*t is poison.

incidentally venlafaxine is the one that put me in hospital after only three months. it's some bad shit alright

[HealthyMan]

Get your blood work done so you have your base. Honestly, if you're not low, the gamble is what will give for you to benefit with a body that doesn't have an issue. Lots to think about.

[KimboHalfSlice]

I wouldn't make this decision before doing 10 days of silence

[InternalFire]

I wouldn't make this decision before doing 10 days of silence

You seem learned quite a bit from monks?

[Mr.BB]

I wouldn't make this decision before doing bloodwork

Fixed

[KimboHalfSlice]

You seem learned quite a bit from monks?

Nothing changes your life so much and so quickly than 10 days with them

[InternalFire]

Nothing changes your life so much and so quickly than 10 days with them

I know that, done it before. but one that does not seek the experience will not go trough it

[KimboHalfSlice]

I know that, done it before. but one that does not seek the experience will not go trough it

I was wondering if that was you. The first time is always the hardest..... unless something really f***ed up happens between courses...... I've done 2 courses so far but the next might prove difficult what with my ex taking her own life back in April

[InternalFire]

leave the past, dont let it chase you, you cant change it so dont bother wasting your time, concentrate on the future and make it better for you and everybody else. you cant change the past but you can change the future, concentrate on this thought and live it.

[Simon1972]

trt is great- but not something to mess with if you want to have kids anytime soon.

Try low dose clomid therapy- might give you the bump you need without shutting you down, you can always get on trt once you have a child, or start now if you never want one.

if you do get on it start low and work up until you normalise-

[JKW]

Im 55 and have been doing it for 2 years. I have never felt better and my drive is back to normal. Wife is 15 years younger than me so I don't want to look, feel and act like her grandpa!

[macmathews]

trt is great- but not something to mess with if you want to have kids anytime soon.

Try low dose clomid therapy- might give you the bump you need without shutting you down, you can always get on trt once you have a child, or start now if you never want one.

if you do get on it start low and work up until you normalise-

I don't read this advice about starting low very often..
Can you elaborate ? what would you call low ?

Mac

[Simon1972]

Clomiphene Citrate (Clomid) in Men - A Testosterone Alternative



Have a read.Educate before you medicate.

[Simon1972]

I don't read this advice about starting low very often..
Can you elaborate ? what would you call low ?

Mac

Starting low, means not starting at 250mg a week. Most guys start at 100 to 150mg a week with good results. Imho 250mg a week is a quasi-steroid cycle and not true trt. At that dose you could blunt your androgen receptors over the long term.