Hi guys, first time poster here but did a decent amount of reading, and will continue to do so which may answer some of my questions.

My history is I am 36, and have run various cycles for the past 15 years. I've done test, eq, tren , winny, etc. I wish I could say that I have done this responsibly and diligently, but to be honest I haven't. I ran a test EQ, winny cycle in 2018, and during that time I had significant family loss (father passed, aunt passed, had a breakup with girlfriend), near the end of that cycle I experienced some serious mental health issues such as panic attacks, anniety, depression, substance use/abuse/etc. I went off in Oct 2018, and stayed off while I worked on my issues. I started to feel pretty good and in January 2020 I thought I would run a low dose text of 200mgs/week to test the waters. Well now its Oct and I've still been on, and I'm starting to have many of the same issues I did previously. Just had another breakup with a girlfriend, who claims I had erratic behaviour due to the test use. I don't feel that testosterone is the main culprit, but is exasperating existing issues. I realize I have an addiction to gear use, which must be dealt with.

I'm going to see my doctor and see what he advises. At this point, I'm worried that if i come off, even with PCT, the depression may be unbearable and perhaps harmful. I'm writing to ask if anyone here has any advice on how to proceed. Would you recommend staying on a low dose (100mgs/week) for a while before doing proper PCT?

Does anyone have any advice to coming off gear from a mental health perspective?

I truly appreciate any information that may be useful during these trying times.

Egg