Thoughts of your household pets
:dg:
Dog: "They keep putting the lid down on the big water bowl."
Goldfish: "Just because I have a three-second memory, they don't think I'll mind eating the same fish flakes over and over............... Oh boy! Fish flakes!"
Dog: "Man, why do they keep rubbing my nose in it? I already KNOW whose it is!"
Goldfish: "The knight never comes out of the castle to fight me for dominion over the fish tank. So I must continue patrolling, for I am lord and master!"
Parrot: "Tease, tease, tease! But do those greedy clowns ever really give me a cracker? **** NO!"
Cat: "Why are these people in my house?"
Dog "I don't care if you take the jewelry or money, but don't mess with the fridge."
Goldfish: "Oh, tap-tap-tap! Oh brilliant, asshole. There's a new one!"
Cat: "I wish he would stop kicking me down the stairs."
Dog: "The 'pretending to throw a stick' game is getting old, but I seem unable to stop myself from looking for it."
Dog: "Why is the baby eating my food..."
Hamster: "Kill me, this wheel is boring."
Iguana: "Oh great, another day of being in this small little cage with my food bowl, my water and these annoying wood chips scraping my ass.
Dog: "Man, my dog food looks exactly like my crap! Well if I'm ever hungry I'll know there's plenty for me in the backyard..."
Dog: "I bet if he could do that, he wouldn't be telling me to stop."
Cat: "Oh no, he's picking me up to do another 'land on all fours off the balcony' test again."
