really need honest info please
Hi Everyone,
I am here only to try and find out more about steriods (oral vs injectable) anything really.
Now. Please bare with me & let me know if i don't belong here.
I am here because i am worried for my sons father.
Story short...
Over the history of our relationship we would have awesome times and like any relationship bad times
The prob was, the bad times were unexpected and very heated. But over nothing.
Anyway moving forward i couldnt understand the rage in him. But he changed and was back to the man i met.
The past say 6- 8 weeks (the same time when he decided he wanted to start training once again after quite a while) he has changed from being loving, supportive, and having time to now creating arguements by exploding for no reason. Has been short tempered with me, my son snd family members. With me though he really puts me down hurls emotional abuse, hate & degrading.
Ok im rambling - sorry.
On sunday.. i had an inkling he was experiencing roid rage (i have tried looking this up and where i read its true its exactly his reaction) but not sure entirely of the facts. So i asked him. I was worried.
When i did he first said oh what do ppl get angry on that stuff. Oh yeh roid rage (played like he never knew anything ) but the next breathe he said oh i remember once giving a mate testaroid (i dont know anything about it) abd he said it was too much.
Anyway. Then i said so do you use them for training he went nuts. I felt scared simply bc of the hate that came out of his mouth. He told me it was none of my buisness because i smoke and im going to die. Then he left and text me to say he takes a **** load of supplements and its his right.. but my question was about steroids.. then he just treated me like that for 3 days again. And today wanted to come over but i was too scared bc in his voice message he was still frustrated/cold.
I got him a small gift the other day after the way he spoke bc i hated that we wrre arguing and i just said i just want you to see we can be open and honest and im worried bc one minute you said you knew nothing then you said uou gave to a friend and now your angry saying extremely nasty things is so angry and cold. And im telling you the week before he exploded bc he dropped a couple of poatos in the sink, bc our son got a spoon from the drawer.. but god forbid if i speak. He hates me. Then few days later wont apologise just expects to come over and im meant to let him hug me and try touch me and hell say love you. But again if i speak, or even a few times i have gone to run my hands along his side and he snapped bc it was too hard! He used to love it.. its more like a tickle. Then he becomes abusive and then i get in trouble bc i wont want to be affectionate with him. Im hurt.
If i try talk about it he tells me he wants to walk and puts me down and blames me for everything.
Its got to the point im so worthless around him. I dont like how i feel and now i cant even reply. I havent attempted since sunday. He hung up on me once again bc i tried to communicate with him and he said ive given this call 12 mins of my time now im done oh and dont message me i cbf **hangs up** i ended up texting him i cant cope with this abuse any more. I raise 3 children on my own and work. Tells me i make him sick bc i dont do gym or have any dreams and i need to go study.
(I def dont have muscle;but weigh 62kg 168cm.) I have a decent job & my dreams are big he just only has time to talk about his dreams.
Anyway my questions are
1. How coyld i know he is using steroids? And not natural supplement drinks
2. If using steroids how could i know if he has injected?
- he has cheated on me before (when pregnant at least) so i know he doesnt really have any respect for me when he doesnt want to.
I am now scared to think he could have been injecting and i not known risks.
If he is this angry over nothing and wont answer (truth by omission?) And got so defensive and angry would i be wrong to assume he does take steroids?
Please dont be offended im not here to judge or put anyone down etc i just dont know enough. I dont really know details of anything he would only say testaoid? Or testarod? Previously.
But there was even one day wjen this very first started i went to visit him on my first day back and he was sleeping (he's always sleeping & then angry if he has too much or not enough) he is always sore. Hell be sore before training and says bc he needs to train. Then after training hes sore. Sometimes grympy sore.
A few times his testes were basically not there & once a few weeks ago i said omg where are they and he just fobbed it off.
Whilst in his abusive angry faze he has said nasty things about our sex life (which was always fantastic) and je could go and scream and swear at me and put me down and even stop me from having any conversation bc he wants to touch me or ask me how much he got me off the last time and just wont let up. Yet.. a few days earlier basically told me i was shit in bed. But later said he said it cos he was angry and just wanted to upset me.
Im just lost. I'm basically not able to deal with these put downs anymore and its safer for me to not even try speak or hell just get angry. I cant be his doormat anymore but i do need to know if he could be injecting for safety and also if i would be stupid to get a test for diseases at all.
I tried to talk compassionatley. I told him i worry for him and no matter how much i tried he just exploded and still.. 5 days later slides anything under the mat and im not allowed to know. Helllppp :, (