
Originally Posted by
Honkey_Kong
Ok. you made him suffer. Did you really get revenge? Did you tie the score? Because that person he killed is still gone. Even if you kill him, you can't get that person back. No matter what you do to him, you're never going to settle that score. And unfortunately, you and the people who cared about that person have to live with that fact.
I'll give you a more "real" anecdote on the desire for revenge that I had. In 2001, I broke my back, arm, nose, lots of internal bleeding and lost a kidney in a pretty bad car wreck (which is the cause of all my problems now). The guy who was driving it was who I'd call my best friend at the time. He was showing off for a girl, went too fast and we hit a big tree head-on. Mind you to this day, I haven't spoken to him and I really don't even know where he is.
I had fantasies for years about what I would do if I ever got my hands on him. The years of rehab, learning to walk again, the constant back pain that I still feel to this day. I wanted to get even so bad. But let's say I got my wish. Let's say I strangled him. Would my back still hurt? Would I still be going through CKD? And to be honest, I don't even think ending his life would give me any relief for the hate that I have towards him.
So I forgave him. Not for his sake, but for mine. The things he did to me there can't be fixed no matter if I got revenge or not. What I couldn't live with anymore was the grief and anger from hating him and that desire for revenge. By forgiving him, I released myself from that and could move on with the rest of my life.