Maybe in some instances the line about the father or b/f, spouse or whomever, might be partly true, but IMO it is dependant on the individual, wheather or not they choose to let that keep them down, or rise above and over come it... Again you can't generalize us all based on the behavior of a few. ( we all come with baggage to a certian degree, male/ female alike you show me someone with out any baggage I say they've never done any packing)
As I see it, some people use their past as a cruth or an excuse, for lots of reasons, not only limited to relationships, but they base their whole life around the fact that they were misstreated, and allow themself to remain the victim, for the entirety of their adult life.
Others use it as a driving force to exceed the expectations of those who tried to supress us in one form or another, and deal with it and move forward at least still willing to "risk, the hurt" and attempt, to seek better.
we aren't afraid to show emotion or to feel pain, it's all a learning process, we all learn at different levels some of us learn quicker than others, some of us never learn! But most of us keep trying, if you bottle up your emotions, for too long it has no where to go but inward, or it will explode, but mostly it just makes you bitter, and lonely!
(Also as a side note, sh!t is sh!t, any which way you stack it or shovel it or wade it we've all been through plenty of it, and no matter what the level of the sh!t may seem to be to others, to those that are going through it, it's still sh!tty... and you can't compare your Sh!t to someone elses Sh!t, and say you've been through more than others, if you don't know all the sh!t they've been through
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And that's not just in reference to your post sweetie, I'm not arguing that your wrong, just adding a different view point to it)