LMAO - Dude I had the same thing once! I called up a hospital hotline freakin' out thinkin' I had gotten an STD. I was describing the shit to detail. They could not figure out exactly what it was and I was told to get to the doc as soon as possible. Me nor my girl new what the f' it was... and then it dawned on us and she was instructed to play nice with my BIG soldier from then on... and be careful with the nails!

Man - was that a trip...