The things you have described about yourself are the exact reasons why you should NOT take steroids. There are many reasons, some of the major ones listed above. Unfortunately for you, this is not the type of place where people line up to tell you all the things you want to hear so we can make new internet bros. Anybody who tells you right now to hold off, is doing so because they are looking out for what is best for you and your health while your judgment is temporarily clouded. Good luck with your endeavors, but you will not get the advise you are seeking here...

PS, just out of curiosity, why do you HAVE to be bigger in 4months?