February 23
Day 21
Things seem to have settled in a bit, so I’ve been waiting on my gym logs. I am still somewhat inexplicably gaining weight on 1300 calories per day. It’s a very bizarre feeling. I put on what used to be a tight dress yesterday, and it looked like a sack. However, I’m up to 157 now. Based on my intake, this has to be good weight, but I don’t want to be the idiot that just got fat taking anavar either, so I’m making my diet a bit more boring this week. My husband eats the most boring bodybuilding diet in the world, so I’ll hop on the plain white fish with vegetables diet for the most part for the next week. We’ll see if I can stomach it. I probably can’t, so I redid my RP Diet app as my backup plan. I start that tomorrow. I also replaced my food scale that was off by 20-50%. I think I immediately noticed it, so I doubt it had much of an impact, but perhaps it did. I also replaced my fitbit, since the HRV wasn’t working anymore, and I’d like to optimize my recovery.

I did some brief calipers a few days ago, but it was virtually identical, so I’ll wait a bit longer. I normally caliper every 2 weeks, so I’ll stop being overzealous and wait.

Bench press
Adding 5 lbs twice a week now.
Feb 9 missed 95
Feb 12 95 x 1
Feb 17 100 x 1
Feb 21 105 x 1 and it felt soooo easy
Some of this is because I can start to arch a bit more from my incisions. They feel weird sometimes still, but at least I can just 2 inches from my bench in the future! My typical not trying bench would be sets at 95, so that’s almost back to normal. I still desperately want to smolov. I probably will smolov up until going on vacation in April, then use that as a rest week and then max my bench when I return.

Deadlift
2/13 worked up to 225x3
2/17 worked up to 215 x5

I could have easily lifted more on both days, but my navel incisions wasn’t having any of it. I cut out about half of my workout on the 17th. I was going to stop at 195 x 7, but something happened (goregrind!) and I decided that I would do 215 for 1. That’s not what I did, because I love deadlifts, but I seem to be fine. Today is deadlift day, and I will try to keep it slow.

I still can’t wear my belt, and I certainly can’t breathe and brace like I normally would. There is no chance of doing my usual violent grip and rip pull either, so I shouldn’t be trying to pull anything close to normal. I am not sure that I will comply with this, but this is what I’m telling myself.

Squat
I want to Zercher squat so badly, but it’s not meant to be with blood draws and probably not great for incisions. I traditionally zercher squat more than I back squat. I don’t know what’s wrong with me either (just kidding, it’s my stupidly long femurs + masochism).
2/14 135x1
2/18 115 x 8 (est 1 RM 143)
I was trying to go easy on my incision again and forcing some “cardio.” I’m squatting quite a bit lower than I normally would. Squats are usually very slow to increase after injuries for me, but I think that’s mostly due to how I fail squats. Quads are my weak point, so I fail near the top and have to go all the way back down to hit the spotter bars, which I obviously avoid. Quads are feeling really good on my squats, however. I can see my quads popping out through my black leggings in my squat videos, and that has never EVER happened before in my life. I don’t feel as stuck in my usual weak spot either. I’ve been doing weighted sissy squats and leg extensions to target them, so it’s not all var, but the visuals are definitely mostly var.

My two week squat gains are about what I would normally get in just over a month returning.

I rely heavily on bracing for the squat, so I also expect huge improvements once I can wear a normal belt.

Calves
I have visible calves now! Also, I used to be unable to do much weight on the calf extension due to an old stress fracture, but I haven’t had any issues. Did I mention this already? I’m still surprised.

Glutes
Skipped the belt squat hip hinge this week to give my bruises a chance to heal. Successfully completed hip thrusts without hurting my incisions. It’s looked like I’ve gotten a butt lift ever since I started anavar, so this isn’t exactly a priority, because it’s going so well.

Biceps
Per arm
2/10 15 x 8 (1RM est 19)
2/14 20 x 4 (1RM est 22)
2/20 20 x 7 (1RM est 24)

These are my max effort curls. I’m close to my usual bicep curl max, particularly because I don’t normally train it. Now that I get to experience pumps in the gym, I train far more biceps than I ever used to train. Next week is looking to be an exciting week.

Back
Lat pull down
2/10 85 x 6 (115)
2/14 95 x 7 (131 est 1RM not from this set)
2/20 145 x 2 (149)
The most I can find that I ever did on the lat pull down is 115 x 8, so this appears to be a new max entirely. My chin up is behind this largely because I don’t want to risk stretching my incisions, so I’m not really trying to get it.

My pull up assist is currently better than my chin up assist. The machine has an incredibly idiotic placement for the hand positions, so I don’t think it’s a me thing. There just isn’t a good chin up placement. I haven’t tested with bands on my rack at home recently, as I’m trying to behave.


Voice app
Nothing interesting is happening here for me, which I guess is good. For whatever reason, I decided to pull my app out for fun while I was watching the fights on Saturday. I took some random audio of Michael Bisping, and it told me he was a female with a higher voice than me. I also did Ben Shapiro, which it rightfully registered as androgynous, and then Chael Sonnen, who also came out as a woman with a voice as high pitched as Michael Bisping. My husband showed up as well into the male range, so I think it’s just the video aspect deciding that everyone is a woman almost.

Regardless, the difference is all that probably matters, and my voice is the same. Just thought it was an odd quirk. I doubt anyone in the history of the world has ever heard Chael’s voice and mistaken him for a woman.


Blood tests and Ovulation
I get my blood test results tomorrow! I happened to have an extremely positive ovulation test the morning of my blood test (day 20), so it will be interesting to see how that matches up. My bloodwork includes LH, FSH, and progesterone, so I should get confirmation of what exactly that positive test means.

I’m also getting vitamin D tested and I went for some tanning the day before to see how it impacts my test.

Depending on my testosterone and free testosterone results, I will most likely try to up my dose. If my SHBG hasn’t decreased, I’ll need to add something to fix it for both gains and endometriosis. I don’t think my test could possibly be anywhere near the normal maximum, because my libido is nowhere near the maximum it’s ever been. I really must have gotten my hands on some of those mythological tainted supplements in the past. I wonder what it was. Anavar has been far more mild than I expected.

I am far more heartless on anavar. Somewhat more heartless. I’m pretty emotionless as it is.