A bit of dating advice?

[Gallowmere]

Loled at the above replies, really grateful for the inputs. I'll let you know as soon as I get married to some other than career and gym.

On a more serious note, what you are describing here is precisely how my girlfriend and I lived our lives for the first three years that we were together. We lived separately, would go for days without talking to each other, but were always there when one needed the other.
We imposed no demands on the others time, and realized that we needed to be able to both be completely comfortable separately in order to be able to be happy together. It gave us some very interesting perspective, and we both had room to grow our own lives while still being able to share in the others improvements and growths.
Fast forward a couple of years, and we now live together and have been able to transfer these perspectives into a closer existence. We both still have demanding careers and when you pair that with my training schedule, we MIGHT see each other for a handful of hours per week, even though we live together. The things gained during our first few years are absolutely fantastic tools for being able to accept this and still be perfectly happy together.

[Fluidic Kimbo]

We both still have demanding careers and when you pair that with my training schedule, we MIGHT see each other for a handful of hours per week, even though we live together.

If you share a bedroom and sleep approximately the same hours then I think that counts as "time together". So that's like 50 hours per week before you have a chat or go jogging together. Just saying.

Time spent with another person doesn't have to be face to face chatting (or even jogging together or going out for meals).

I haven't lived with a partner in a few years, but when I last did, we were both unemployed and spent pretty much all day together. If you subtracted toilet breaks, and occasional walks into different rooms of the house to find a TV remote control or whatever, and then rounded down the hours we spent together, then we probably came out at 23 hours per day. Maybe once in a while it was 22 hours if she went to see her therapist that day. Obviously it wasn't an ideal relationship, nor was either of us living an ideal life.

Some people go the whole hog on "independence" or "solitude" and even sleep in a separate room to their partner. (even though they live in the same house). I even met one guy whose wife lived in a different city (they didn't have any children).

Some people think that every human should form a pairbond to have the most fulfilling life, but then again some people take a vow of celibacy and go live in an ashram/temple/monastery. If you do form a pairbond then I suppose every relationship is unique, and different couples have different ideas of what is "too much time together" or "too much time apart".

I haven't been in a realtionship in a few years, but I imagine the next time I live with a girl, we'd probably want at least 8 hours per week on top of the ~50 sleeping hours together. With that said though, I'm a very different person today than I was a few years ago.

[Gallowmere]

If you share a bedroom and sleep approximately the same hours then I think that counts as "time together". So that's like 50 hours per week before you have a chat or go jogging together. Just saying.

Time spent with another person doesn't have to be face to face chatting (or even jogging together or going out for meals).

I haven't lived with a partner in a few years, but when I last did, we were both unemployed and spent pretty much all day together. If you subtracted toilet breaks, and occasional walks into different rooms of the house to find a TV remote control or whatever, and then rounded down the hours we spent together, then we probably came out at 23 hours per day. Maybe once in a while it was 22 hours if she went to see her therapist that day. Obviously it wasn't an ideal relationship, nor was either of us living an ideal life.

Some people go the whole hog on "independence" or "solitude" and even sleep in a separate room to their partner. (even though they live in the same house). I even met one guy whose wife lived in a different city (they didn't have any children).

Some people think that every human should form a pairbond to have the most fulfilling life, but then again some people take a vow of celibacy and go live in an ashram/temple/monastery. If you do form a pairbond then I suppose every relationship is unique, and different couples have different ideas of what is "too much time together" or "too much time apart".

I haven't been in a realtionship in a few years, but I imagine the next time I live with a girl, we'd probably want at least 8 hours per week on top of the ~50 sleeping hours together. With that said though, I'm a very different person today than I was a few years ago.

That’s the thing though; due to our work schedules for much of the year, sleeping together isn’t a thing either. For example, starting this Sunday, I’ll be covering our lab at night for the next few months, so I’ll be sleeping while she is at work and vice versa. As such, our time together will be limited to crossing paths on the way in and out of the door, to and from work.

[< <Samson> >]

That’s the thing though; due to our work schedules for much of the year, sleeping together isn’t a thing either. For example, starting this Sunday, I’ll be covering our lab at night for the next few months, so I’ll be sleeping while she is at work and vice versa. As such, our time together will be limited to crossing paths on the way in and out of the door, to and from work.

Read this^ - but, not paragraphs of made up gibberish

It all depends on how you/we are - I’m bad with this stuff, every time I got OTR I can’t sleep without my son or wife near by - even when we face time or whatever, I get all strung out - I can manage without one, but not both


Over the years I formed some odd co-dependence or some shit - I can’t b alone any more for extended periods of time. I don’t freak out - but, I can’t rest - let alone fall asleep

[sv.elia]

We imposed no demands on the others time, and realized that we needed to be able to both be completely comfortable separately in order to be able to be happy together. It gave us some very interesting perspective, and we both had room to grow our own lives while still being able to share in the others improvements and growths.

I really admire that type of independency, but personally I don't know if I'd be able to pull it.

How’s life rn on the other side of the globe anyway?

Really peaceful where I live. Businesses are too small and they won't risk losing clients on account of corona, so rules are quite disregarded. If there won't be a second wave things will turn as good as they were.

[Gallowmere]

I really admire that type of independency, but personally I don't know if I'd be able to pull it.

She and I will be the first ones to admit that we are pretty damned abnormal when compared to most people, so it wouldn’t surprise me if you couldn’t. For whatever weird reason, we don’t require regular reaffirmation of each others thoughts and feelings (though we give then often anyway) in order to feel secure in our lives together.
Part of this may be just how we are as people, but it’s likely that our friendship/relationship (a coming and going that spans almost 20 years at this point) shifts over the years has more to do with it. We first crossed paths in 2003, then held a long distance friendship for six years, tried dating in 2009, separated after a few months, then had barely any contact for another six years. We fell back into each others lives in 2015, and have been involved in some way since.
It’s been a long and weird trip, but we just kept finding ourselves back in each others lives, and even more attracted to each other than the last time.

[< <Samson> >]

Really peaceful where I live. Businesses are too small and they won't risk losing clients on account of corona, so rules are quite disregarded. If there won't be a second wave things will turn as good as they were.

Gotcha,


Here's is def not as well - apparently it's not that small of a population out here - now we're leading the way of states per capita deaths & cases < totally great

[JaneDoe]

Do you still have contact with this guy who ignored you?

[sv.elia]

Nope^ thanks for being thoughtful

[JaneDoe]

Nope^ thanks for being thoughtful

The best thing you did was to continue living your life. Because running after an asshole doesn't pay.

[sv.elia]

Absolutely^

On a funnier note, I just found this on the internet, lol

Attachment 179525

[JaneDoe]

Absolutely^

On a funnier note, I just found this on the internet, lol

Attachment 179525

lmao[emoji3][emoji3][emoji959]

[Fluidic Kimbo]

Absolutely^

On a funnier note, I just found this on the internet, lol

Attachment 179525

I, too, masturbate.

[Oliver47]

No matter which app I use, I have a few rules – reject any woman with a Snapchat filter on their pics. How old are you? 10? 12? That’s a massive purge to start with.

Then avoid any woman who’s “hobby” is meeting family and friends. How bloody boring must she be if thats a hobby?

Dump all those who say they “love to laugh”. Oh, there’s me loving to cry my stupid eyes out every night in misery and agony!

Read reviews on dating apps, like this zoosk review

Avoid any profile which only has a face photo… well, unless you like surprises, of course.

Then I’m left with the normal/interesting ones.

You know nothing about them until you meet = a few I’ve got on fantastically on texts, then you meet and it’s instant hatred!

I'm still single btw

[lovbyts]

^^ So people still use dating apps? I guess a sucker is still born every day. I gave up on those 20 years ago. lol Every successful or at least long term relationship I have had was meeting someone by chance usually doing something I like to do outdoors. Not clubs, not at the gym.

Keep doing what you are doing (Living life) and when its right you will meat the right person. Until then enjoy those you do meat even if they are not Mr. Ms. right. All the ones I thought were a great match in the past were more my reflection of who I thought they were than who they really were.

[Test Monsterone]

Had a dating app for a month and went on a couple of dates that turned out to be wastes of time. What kind of girls don't fuck on the second date? If the girl is a 5 in real life, she's a 8 on a dating app. You know how many matches/swipes/whatever the fuck girls get on apps? They get hundreds. So I went and got my new girl in real life. I realized that the difference beween most men and women is that most men will still fuck you even they think you're a lunatic, but if a girl doesn't like 1 thing about you (or her perception of it), you ain't getting any. And so, I'd rather go for girls in life that are already interested in me than have to build up whatever is in her dumb ass mind.

[lovbyts]

Had a dating app for a month and went on a couple of dates that turned out to be wastes of time. What kind of girls don't fuck on the second date? If the girl is a 5 in real life, she's a 8 on a dating app. You know how many matches/swipes/whatever the fuck girls get on apps? They get hundreds. So I went and got my new girl in real life. I realized that the difference beween most men and women is that most men will still fuck you even they think you're a lunatic, but if a girl doesn't like 1 thing about you (or her perception of it), you ain't getting any. And so, I'd rather go for girls in life that are already interested in me than have to build up whatever is in her dumb ass mind.

With all the app filters as well as spray on makeup, clear tape to get rid of turkey neck and stuff like that a 3 can easily become an 8+ now days.

Back in the day when I first tried a dating app/online about 50% of the people didnt even have pictures because digital cameras were $$$$ and POOR quality. One date I had the girls profile said 5' 5" Height, weight proportionate. She was active duty army, into horse back riding, scuba diving and a few other outdoor activities. When I saw her the first thing that crossed my mind was, Poor horse. I think she got confused with proportionate and symmetrical. She was 5' 5" x 5' 5". That was the day I made the rule of no picture no messages.

I have to say Im blessed now. IMO My wife looks hotter with no makeup and when she wakes up in the morning with her hair all disheveled. Im glad to not have to be in the dating scene anymore.

[Hughinn]

So far I only met guys that were attracted to me when I played hard-to-get, and the moment I started being reassuring regarding my feelings, they started losing interest.

Am I dating the wrong type or really no man likes women that are doing a bit of courtship themselves (like sending first lines, reminders, compliments and so on)?

Recently I did just that to a terribly good looking athlete, but I got late short replies. And I don't know what to think, is he busy or am I fooling myself into believing he has any use of some building up from me.

I played hard-to-get games on a few ppl a while ago, resulting in some talk of long term commitment. But I did not like having the upper hand, being less involved and always with a thought ahead. Being manipulative feels lonely.

Do I really have to be a distant cold bitch to get
the interest of a good man? Or maybe wait longer for someone else?

There's not a damn thing wrong with a woman who knows what she wants and is willing to pursue it. That shows a very genuine and confident type of woman.

That said, it takes a certain type of man to appreciate those qualities in a woman. You could say that he'd have to have similar qualities himself.

By and large, narcissistic personality people will not have those qualities.

My opinion, to put it simply is something my wife said to me back when we were dating. She had a very popular and attractive athlete pursuing her at the same time I was.

She chose me obviously. And explained it like this. *"I don't want a man who tries harder to look pretty than I do"


I think she was onto something. Because one is a man in love with her. The other is a man in love with himself and wanting her as his "accessory" if you will. Not to say people can't have good relationships as accessories to each other. But that doesn't seem like what your looking for.

And accessories get traded out. But a man's pride and joy is never going anywhere.

I'd suggest looking for someone who wants to be part of your life. To share it with you. Not just "place" you in his for decoration or whatever. Think about a strong but humble working man instead of a white collar gym body.

I got an idea, you could whip any man into shape with a little persuasion. Especially if he really wants to please you. Confidence and independence would be the qualities I'd look for first. Self adoration and arrogance should be a red flag. He's got to want to put you first. Otherwise you're not going to get the type of supportive relationship you mentioned in the sense that you'd like to be the one pursued and lavished. Without having to manipulate it into being.

Just my opinion. But I think you're pursuing the wrong type of guy for what it seems you want out of a man. And you're likely looking in the wrong places as well.

I think if you tweak those things a little. You'll find a guy you've got to beat back with a stick because he'll be all over you all the time.

[warchild]

Every dating site I used I got cat fished

[JaneDoe]

Old post from SV.Elia

[< <Samson> >]

Old post from SV.Elia

Miss her a tad

This place is a ghost town now

[Cuz]

Miss her a tad

This place is a ghost town now

Her and that avi tho

[JaneDoe]

Miss her a tad

This place is a ghost town now

Maybe she'll log back in someday

[JaneDoe]

Speaking of which, you know something about SampsonandDelilah, he's a good guy.

[warchild]

Speaking of which, you know something about SampsonandDelilah, he's a good guy.

Sent him a PM, never heard back. Hope he's ok. Good guy.

[Cuz]

S&D hasnt been online since mid March, havent seen Gallowmere around awhile either.

[warchild]

S&D hasnt been online since mid March, havent seen Gallowmere around awhile either.

I get it sometimes we all take a break from this place, I have for years. The concerning thing for S&D was if his cancer returned more aggressive.

[Cuz]

I get it sometimes we all take a break from this place, I have for years. The concerning thing for S&D was if his cancer returned more aggressive.

I think he would have let us know. Hopefully thats not the case tho

[Fluidic Kimbo]

I think he would have let us know. Hopefully thats not the case tho

Yeah I think one of the first things he'd have done is tell us. Probably something like this order:
Tell wife
Tell forum
Tell friends
Tell kids
Tell colleagues

[warchild]

Yeah I think one of the first things he'd have done is tell us. Probably something like this order:
Tell wife
Tell forum
Tell friends
Tell kids
Tell colleagues

Lmao priorities!

[BG]

I get it sometimes we all take a break from this place, I have for years. The concerning thing for S&D was if his cancer returned more aggressive.

I was just thinking its been a little while since you have been around.

[warchild]

I was just thinking its been a little while since you have been around.

Married with kids and work but I always managed to keep training! How you been??

[warchild]

I’m know BG and I and maybe a few of us have known or seen members pass away over the years. Some good guys too. T-mos and Inky come to mind.

[< <Samson> >]

Hope not, hope that big fucker is doing better than I am


Shit, and I’m doing quite fucking well atm - well, personal BS aside - health is solid

[Honkey_Kong]

Hope not, hope that big fucker is doing better than I am


Shit, and I’m doing quite fucking well atm - well, personal BS aside - health is solid

Does anybody know him from outside the forum? If somebody does, shoot him a text to see how he's doing.

[< <Samson> >]

Does anybody know him from outside the forum? If somebody does, shoot him a text to see how he's doing.

I don’t - I won’t link up with anyone off this board or anywhere else online after getting burned

But, yeah - vanished, like most members do off here. . . Truly hope that he’s living his best life

[Cuz]

I don’t - I won’t link up with anyone off this board or anywhere else online after getting burned

But, yeah - vanished, like most members do off here. . . Truly hope that he’s living his best life

He’ll be back...

[warchild]

Does anybody know him from outside the forum? If somebody does, shoot him a text to see how he's doing.

I only know his first name and the state he lives in..no phone number tho

[Test Monsterone]

We need a buddy system on here.

[lovbyts]

Why do newbies always revive OLD post that are long dead? lol