First Cycle / Taking anti-depresants

[Honkey_Kong]

I realize that, I took one anti-depressants out, soon the other one (under doctor's supervision)
I don't have any financial problems, I am well set off in life. its just I been through some shit and I didn't handle it properly.
I am a guy with a lot of patience, I can control my anger however thats my problem is that I lock all my emotions and thats what lead me to be here.
Anti-depressants don't solve the main problem, without them I was not eating,sleeping or able to focus, they helped me get back on my feet.

Why are you trying to talk him in to switching his position and giving you his approval? He gave you his advice, either take it or leave it. You already have it in your mind you're going to do gear, so what would you gain by getting his permission? Do you just want to be fluffed or something?

[heller190]

Why are you trying to talk him in to switching his position and giving you his approval? He gave you his advice, either take it or leave it. You already have it in your mind you're going to do gear, so what would you gain by getting his permission? Do you just want to be fluffed or something?

Are you a dumbass?? How am I trying to get his approval or his permission?? I am responding to what he said.
Besides I've already stated previously that I might do the cycle in few months only after I am off the antidepressants.
Now why the fuck are you bothering me?? don't you have something better to do?

[Test Monsterone]

Are you a dumbass?? How am I trying to get his approval or his permission?? I am responding to what he said,
Besides I've already stated previously that I am going to do an only test cycle in few months only after I am off the SSRI's.
Now why the fuck are you bothering me?? don't you have something better to do?

I don't see anything wrong with what you said. I think something got misinterpreted. You seem like a smart guy, and asking questions and sharing experiences is part of the learning process. You're better off than 90% of the guys who start gear, ask questions later.

The longer I've been off gear now, the more I think about what I would tell myself before I got on gear and if I would have changed anything. It's tough to say, because at that time I was actually quite depressed and had a "fuck it" mentality. Sure, I did my research to mitigate risks, but at that point I was pretty deep in the hole and my future health and longevity were not a concern. Now, a few years older, a few years wiser, having come off gear, I have a different perspective. Everyone has different goals and outlooks on life, so we all come to our own conclusions. Imo, at the end of the day, being natty is always going to be the best route because it's the least risky. But, had I not had the 4 years of experience with gear under my belt, I would have always wondered what it would be like. And, in a way, steroids catapulted me out of that depression and made me confident again. I felt like my old self again. It's strange that now, having done the gear and probably having lower t than I had before I started steroids, I feel better than I have in a long time. I like the wave I'm on at the moment. Maybe that will change at some point. When I first got on gear, and probably the first couple of years, I would have told anyone to get on TRT. I don't know if I would do that now. No injections, no elevated estrogen, no mood swings, no sleep apnea... I feel much better being off gear in many ways. I think about things in a practical but also philosophical way. This is a lifestyle choice, but it comes with consequences. If you need to talk about this, pm me.