In short, I don’t like her, never really have. She does not like me, looks at me like a womanizer or a slut because I’ve been single for 9 months and have had 3 girl friends over that period. I talk to girls at the bar when I go out.
She’s super jealous, if boobs are on the TV she has to leave the room and ask her husband (my best friend) “Do you like her boobs more than mine” in a pissed off tone. When she finds porn on the history of the PC, he has to blame it on me. I don’t like her because she complains a married 28 year old man is looking at porntube and she does not like me because I take the blame willingly.

Her best friend is a “guy” we can call him “Jake”. I posted awhile back that I had suspected the 2 of “having feelings” but I’m not sure if they have done anything yet. One of my Ex’s is good friends with her. Jake got my boys wife flowers for valentines day, but what made me wonder about it was she had to hide it from my boy. She asked my Ex to say the flowers were hers. Now Jake and my boys wife go out to the bar after work, have drinks and talk, or go to dinner. He’s always around.

She tells my boy that Jake likes her, but she just feels bad for him. When my Ex was dancing with Jake at the bar, the wife got so jealous that the 2 girls almost got in a fight. Jake is far from a ladies’ man.

There is not a ton of weight behind what I say, as it’s well known I harbor a certain amount of hostility toward her. I know what I know, but I speculate with what I know that they are either doing things, coming close to doing things, have done things in the past or will be in the near future.
I have 3 options right now:

1. Talk to Jake, I could invite him out for a drink. Put him on the spot, ask him how the 2 met, what he likes about her so much. Maybe ask “could you see yourself with her romantically?” He’ll say “no way, we are just friends” and I’ll bring up she is married and of course this makes her off limits. I’d like to bring up that being around someone of the opposite sex every day eventually feelings come about.

2. Talk to the wife. Basically the same talk I’d have with Jake but addressed towards her. I’ll bring up that I’ve heard rumors, I don’t believe them, but I don’t like hearing them and I don’t want to talk to my friend about them but eventually he’s going to hear them from someone, if not me.

3. Talk to my boy. I’d rather just do this. But if she ends up actually to be sleeping with the guy, and he chooses not to file for the divorce and work things out with her. She’ll hate me even worse; it would be hard for him not to put distance between us. No matter what I tell him, he’s going to think I am judging him for talking her back.

I like options 1 and 2 best. If he finds out I had this talk with them, and I’ve never told him. I come off as a good friend looking out for his best interest, and not looking for a pat on the back for it. Come off as a selfless person looking out for him. It would stop anything from happening, or stop what is happening already.

What do you guys think?