Chinese astrology: In the year of the Bull, we had Mad Cow disease, in the year of the Pig, Swine flu, next year is the year of the Cock....
are you men worried yet?
Chinese astrology: In the year of the Bull, we had Mad Cow disease, in the year of the Pig, Swine flu, next year is the year of the Cock....
are you men worried yet?
Are you?
Well....... maybe a little, if I get dick flu will I have to wear one of those respiratory masks over it when I go out into public? That might be awkward.
i put my junk at greater risk before. it can take it
This is what I googled about "cock flu"..........I found it on the net so this thing must be real.
What is Cock Flu and where does it come from you ask? Evidently it comes from my penis. Well, not my penis exactly, but from penises in general. Let me explain and maybe you will understand.
Over the past few days there has been a large number of posters show up in the men’s restroom at my place of work. They are everywhere, above each urinal, on the door to each toilet, even posted above all the sinks in the men’s restroom. The posters warn that not washing our hands after touching our penis will lead to an outbreak in the flu virus.
Okay, it doesn’t specifically say our penis is the exact source of the flu, but it is implied. To make matters worse, yesterday Human Resources came around and gave each of us a small bottle of hand sanitizer as well as antibacterial wipes to clean our keyboard, phone, desk etc. Not to mention they have put into place a new policy concerning illnesses that could be flu related. An email was also sent out to all employees about hand washing after using the bathroom and the spread of those germs being directly related to the spreading of the flu virus.
Maybe now you can see where the Cock Flu idea came from. To be honest, Cock Flu does not scare me; it is what the negative use of the word cock could do for all men. Have you not heard the stories of what Swine Flu has done for the price of pork?
Most people are afraid to eat pork, not to mention that pork producers and hog farmers have suffered dearly from the negative image that has come out of the use of the term Swine Flu. I just think some early damage control should be done before a rash of Cock Flu spreads across America.
It can be challenging enough to get someone else to touch my penis without there being a concern of catching some new exotic strain of the flu virus. My only hope is that should there really be an epidemic of Cock Flu in our future, the increasing number of unemployed Americans could be put to work. The president did promise more jobs, this could be a way for him to follow through with that promise. There could be countless new jobs created as Cock Wranglers. I know several people who have always wanted to earn a Ph.D., now they could get that opportunity.
Well, sort of.
Let us say a person was hired as a Cock Wrangler, I am sure they would need some sort of certification from the Department of Health. I guess it might be called a Penis Handling Degree, see I told you they would get a PHD out of the deal.
Why would there be a need for such jobs? If there really was an outbreak of Cock Flu, I would no longer want to touch my penis. I am sure there are countless men that would take extreme measures to avoid touching their penis so that they might maintain good health and avoid contracting the Cock Flu virus. Who knows, maybe this specialized position could be covered under President Obama’s new health care plan. That just might be what he needs to get the people who oppose his health care plan to come over to his side. The idea of having my very own Cock Wrangler sounds pretty tempting, especially if it is covered by health insurance.
Granted, I am sure there would be some sort of catch if insurance was to cover such a service. Just as you have to pay more for name brand prescriptions versus the cheaper cost of a generic, I am sure a better looking and more experienced name brand Cock Wrangler would probably cost more than some generic no name version. It could, however, be really bad if Walmart was to get involved. They have really been pushing their $4 prescriptions that no one else can beat. Imagine, if you will, what a Walmart priced, generic version of a Cock Wrangler might be? Dear god, it could be some Sally Kern look-a-like. Ugh, now that thought really scares me.
As I mentioned before, these are just some ideas I have come up with to help preserve the good name of cocks across the country. Hopefully nothing will become of my Cock Flu theory, but should an outbreak occur, you heard about it here first.
Last edited by JD250; 12-02-2011 at 09:47 PM.
Yep. I randomly think of chicks, too.
i wish chick randomly thought of me
i think you guys all missed the punchline here...she wasnt talking about cock flu she was asking if the ladys where scared about all the cock they would be recieving it being the "year of the cock"...am i the only one that thought her original post what kinda hot?...anyways i got a good chuckle out of it...
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)