Im a 19 year old male. I have been working out since i was 16, but unfortunately due to health and personal problems i havent been able to even get close to a good physique . It has always been my dream to be a teen fitness model and an actor. When i started working out at 16 i would starve myself trying to remain as thin as possible due to the trauma i faced because of being overweight in school so i was scared of getting fat again. I was about 105 lbs at 5'9 when i started.
Finally i started eating right got good gains, became stronger reached upto 155(with fat gains) lbs at the same height in like 2 years. But then i got severe chicken pox and lost most of my gains. I started working out again, was making steady progress but then i had a severe ankle sprain due to which i was advised bed rest and couldnt workout. Now i cant workout my legs till my ankle heals completly.
This and i kept falling sick which has left me with a skinny fat physique.
Now that im 19 i realize that my dream of being a teen model isnt going to come true.
I need advise on this matter and on what steroids should i use or if i should use them at all.
I know people will tell me you have high testosterone right now but even with such test levels it would take me like 2more years to get anywhere near the physique i want.
I really want to start modelling auditions but i cant become a model with skinny fat 12 inch arms right?
I look like pathetic when im shirtless and this is after 3years of hard work.
Im frustrated, depressed and i think a cycle could save me.
I dont want to abuse steroids, just do one cycle so that i can get my body composition right and start modelling.