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Thread: Do you relate?
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11-02-2005, 10:36 PM #1
Do you relate?
I’m a modern man, a man for the millennium.
Digital and smoke free.
A diversified multi-cultural,
post-modern deconstruction,
that is anatomically and ecologically incorrect.
I’ve been up linked and downloaded,
I’ve been inputted and outsourced,
I know the upside of downsizing,
I know the downside of upgrading.
I’m a high-tech low-life.
A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker
and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond!
I’m new wave, but I’m old school
and my inner child is outward bound.
I’m a hot-wired, heat seeking,
warm-hearted, cool customer,
voice activated and bio-degradable.
I interface with my database,
my database is in cyberspace,
so I’m interactive, I’m hyperactive
and from time to time I’m radioactive.
Behind the eight ball, ahead of the curve,
ridin the wave, dodgin the bullet and pushin the envelope.
I’m on-point, on-task, on-message and off drugs.
I’ve got no need for coke and speed.
I've got no urge to binge and purge.
i’m in-the-moment, on-the-edge, over-the-top and under-the-radar.
A high-concept, low-profile, medium-range ballistic missionary.
A street-wise smart bomb.
A top-gun bottom feeder.
I wear power ties, I tell power lies,
I take power naps and run victory laps.
I’m a totally ongoing big-foot, slam-dunk, rainmaker
with a pro-active outreach.
A raging workaholic. A working rageaholic.
Out of rehab and in denial!
I’ve got a personal trainer, a personal shopper, a personal assistant
and a personal agenda.
You can’t shut me up.
You can’t dumb me down
because I’m tireless and I’m wireless,
I’m an alpha male on beta-blockers.
I’m a non-believer and an over-achiever,
laid-back but fashion-forward.
Up-front, down-home, low-rent, high-maintenance.
Super-sized, long-lasting, high-definition, fast-acting,
oven-ready and built-to-last!
I’m a hands-on, foot-loose, knee-jerk head case
pretty maturely post-traumatic
and I’ve got a love-child that sends me hate mail.
But, I’m feeling, I’m caring, I’m healing, I’m sharing--
a supportive, bonding, nurturing primary care-giver.
My output is down, but my income is up.
I took a short position on the long bond
and my revenue stream has its own cash-flow.
I read junk mail, I eat junk food, I buy junk bonds and I watch trash sports!
I’m gender specific, capital intensive, user-friendly and lactose intolerant.
I like rough sex. I like tough love. I use the “F” word in my emails
and the software on my hard-drive is hardcore--no soft porn.
i bought a microwave at a mini-mall; I
bought a mini-van at a mega-store.
I eat fast-food in the slow lane.
I’m toll-free, bite-sized, ready-to-wear and I come in all sizes.
A fully-equipped, factory-authorized, hospital-tested,
clinically-proven, scientifically- formulated medical miracle.
I’ve been pre-wash, pre-cooked, pre-heated, pre-screened,
pre-approved, pre-packaged, post-dated, freeze-dried,
double-wrapped, vacuum-packed and,
I have an unlimited broadband capacity.
i’m a rude dude, but I’m the real deal.
Lean and mean! Cocked, locked and ready-to-rock.
Rough, tough and hard to bluff.
I take it slow, I go with the flow, I ride with the tide.
I’ve got glide in my stride.
Drivin and movin, sailin and spinin, jiving and groovin, wailin and winnin.
I don’t snooze, so I don’t lose.
I keep the pedal to the metal and the rubber on the road.
I party hearty and lunch time is crunch time.
I’m hangin in, there ain’t no doubt
and I’m hangin tough, over and out!
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11-02-2005, 11:05 PM #2
sum it up in one sentence then i'll tell you if I relate.
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11-02-2005, 11:31 PM #3Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Posts
- 851
Is that George Carlin? Looks familiar.
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11-03-2005, 01:22 AM #4
psh thats nuthin compared to the AVENGED
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11-03-2005, 03:07 AM #5
LoL yea its Carlin..... Who or what the foo is the AVENGED????
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11-03-2005, 04:09 AM #6
Even if he were born 50 years from now, Carlin would still have been ahead of his time. The man is a philosopher/critic with a rapier wit. Not to mention an extraordinarily gifted manipulator of the English language. The fact that he's not shy about being vulgar as hell just adds to his charm
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11-03-2005, 08:38 PM #7
yea, i agree..Ya know he's doin a Live HBO Special this weekend 9 central time.. That little ditty up there will be on it.. I saw him live a few months back, the show was more than great to say the least.
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11-03-2005, 08:41 PM #8
I got so bored after the first paragraph...i stopped.
Frickin novel!
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11-03-2005, 08:48 PM #9Originally Posted by ShnouzedUp
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11-03-2005, 11:43 PM #10
one of my favorite bands.... you a killswitch fan chest? ooorrr Atreyu maybe?
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11-04-2005, 11:07 AM #11AR Hall of Fame
- Join Date
- Dec 2002
- Posts
- 25,737
Originally Posted by Pinkvelvet
~SC~
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05-25-2006, 08:27 AM #12Junior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2005
- Location
- Canada
- Posts
- 133
man i thought you wrote that....and ya it is long as hell
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05-25-2006, 08:50 AM #13
where is Snoozie?
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05-25-2006, 09:58 AM #14Originally Posted by ShnouzedUp
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05-25-2006, 10:03 AM #15
what type of music is that?
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05-25-2006, 11:20 AM #16
ahh he is suspended
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05-25-2006, 12:33 PM #17Originally Posted by DamnYouMSN
you can still understand the words but it has a lot of screaming.
hard guitar and drums in the majority of the songs
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