put a password of ur phone and u wont have any issue thats all.....or go through her phoneOriginally Posted by Kratos
Also Remember Calgarian is a fictitious character which doesn't exists in the real world.....
Knowledgeable Member
put a password of ur phone and u wont have any issue thats all.....or go through her phone
Also Remember Calgarian is a fictitious character which doesn't exists in the real world.....
Last edited by calgarian; 01-19-2010 at 02:01 PM.
Anabolic Member
I aggree....
Anabolic Member
You gotta learn to cover your ass. And, I am not talking about just with respect to this issue, with respect to all issues.
Yeah its private, and yes as many have said for many reasons your shit will get looked at. See all you have to do is hit the delete option and you are g2g.
Oh and I still vote for kicking the bitch out. But, remember there is something to be learned here.
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he's cheatin on us?? oh hell no..
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Senior Member
id be like lies and trust dont go hand to hand its one thing to go thru my stuff while im not there curiosity can get the best of us all but to lie to me over something so small makes me wonder when something big comes around if there will be another lie
plus sound like u both need to lay all ur cards on the table cause if shes still a pill head u wanna move on like now iv know people like this my step sister and her hubby were both vicodin popers even tho he made 1200 a week there were always broke cause of it
and ur now having doubts u need to talk
Banned
That couldn't have went any worse imo.
I have no idea what your mad about, the girl is holding in some pretty serious thoughts about you and naturally shes worried.
I also agree with moose, but I don't say 99%, I say 100% of people would have read the texts. People are naturally inquisitive like that, its not insecurity, its just human curiosity. Especially if noones around, it didn't even happen in their mind, so thats how they will act about it, she prob doesn't view it as lying realistically.
And in her mind, her lying is no where as bad as you not answering her. You're feeding her ideas just by keeping it secretive. Put yourself in her shoes. Would you have not been curious? Or maybe you think you would have told her you read her texts? idk
Its natural to always be a tad skeptical about your partner, and the fact is you left your phone there, its open game at that point. I'm not sure you overreacted, I just think ignoring her and the situation leading to you leaving is how a couple of 16 year olds would have handled it.
Tell her assertively what the deal is, and that you don't appreciate her lying to you and going through your stuff. If she disrespected you afterwards , then yeh, I would have peaced out. But I think this blew up a little bigger then it should of because you have a serious problem with dishonesty, its cool, a lot of people do, but people are naturally deceptive so much (either directly or indirectly) throughout the course of a day, that reacting that way is really gonna just stress you out more in the end.
The girl is worried, shes not trying to play games, she just wants the truth. But you turned it into a little rollercoaster of "ok, you wanna lie to me?" and I just believe you could have been more forgiving. I understand you didn't do anything wrong, and that she did, but you're not helping the situation get any better, you're just instigating more bs to happen. All and all, do what feels right to you, but don't take it too seriously. And remember, women are never wrong. =]
edit: last thing I wanna add is that people are not stupid, you think you might have "caught" her lying but she knows damn well she told you in her mind. She obviously knew you would have found out simply by asking "were you thinking of leaving me a month ago"? She essentially DID tell you right there that she lied. And she easily could have kept her mouth shut, and you would have had no clue about it. I just say give her a little more credit then you are. She doesn't seem like she lies for a living, because she obviously can't hold a fvckn secret in the first place, which tells me shes not a terrible person at all because she doesn't seem to have any experience to actually be good at it.
Last edited by Bojangles69; 01-19-2010 at 04:46 PM.
100% American Beef
you lost me all after "This couldn't have went any worse imo." lol
Banned
ok, after that I said "I have no idea what your mad about". I can help you sound it out if need be.
*eye hav no eye-dia wut u r mad abowt*
now you try. =]
100% American Beef
thanks that did help. Please repeat the following out load 3 times "I am sofa king we todd did"
Banned
I AM THE SOFA KING!!!!!!
=]
haha, somebodies trying to set bo up again, NEVA!!!!!!!!
Associate Member
I think you would also be upset if you found a text on your gf's phone saying "did you break up with your boyfriend yet".
Plus i agree with bojangles that 100% of us would look through anothers phone, given the chance out of curiosity.
Anabolic Member
Spot on post! Summed up what I was going to write exactly.
Banned
I would say "look I have given this a lot of thought and I want you to understand that this is truly a one time deal, I wont forgive this agian. i feel disrespected becasue first I am trustworthy so you dont need to snoop, second I treasure my privacy, not becasue I have something to hide but because it is the one thing that remains mine no matter what. It is intimacy with myself. But based off of the situation you are unfortunately in I am going to explain this one time becasue i aslo value our relationship. (then explain the texts) and say "now that you understand the integrity here in this situation I want you to acknowledge this boundary that I have, no snooping through my stuff, not now not ever, deal?"
good luck bro
Anabolic Member
I agree with some of the other guys, I don't know if any girl would not go through your text messages if your phone was there 3 days.
I'm sure you have nothing to hide, but I don't see why you would not just explain the text to her to make her feel more secure. No sense in fighting over it.
I'd go through my girls phone if it was at my house for 3 days, not even out of insecurity, but I'd want to know what she talks to her friends about, if they say good or bad things about me. Just plain old curiosity.
Senior Member
have you gone through her phone before? if so then two wrongs dont make a right. tell her you trust her and know she is better than that to lie to you. if not the disregard this post.
Live every week like it's shark week
Reading stuff like this makes me glad that i'm not in a relationship.
I feel accomplished
bo, your post was very helpful
it was how I was feeling on this issue
the only thing I disagree with is couldn't have gone any worse part. Leaving might not be ideal but it worked out. For me taking a step back is often what I need to deal with things where emotion is involved...because usually my mind only deals in logic. I don't like acting on emotion.
first of all, I didn't want to go overboard with a fight. I needed to think rather then react. It was a good punishment letting her think the worst for a day about what the meaning of the txts was...which wouldn't have been the case if there was anything there for her to be upset about. Made her realize maybe it's not as fun to get fragments of snooping information as she thought.
anyway, I didn't feel like dealing with it yesterday so I went out to dinner with some friends...when I got back to my car saw she had called. Didn't get to her place until almost 10...that made her unhappy. That was a little immature on my part because I told her "I'll talk to you about it tomorrow" when I left the day before. But, then I didn't make any effort to contact her or even make it possible to contact me...so that was wrong.
But anyway, we talked it out...the whole thing only took a half hour or so. We both felt better after and better understood. Then I crushed it and went to sleep.
Senior Member
gotta love getting into fights
Member
My ex from a few years back didnt have a computer, well created a login for her cell phone that she didnt know about... Well lets just say I could see every incomming and outgoing call online 1 hr after the call accured... Well I realized she was talking to her old EX BF almost every night after i would leave her house.. So yea, she got dumped pretty quick... Do i regret what I did..... Hell No... And she was doing this after she said she loved me and wanted to have my kids... So how f#$ked up is that....
Banned
wtf edit
Last edited by Bojangles69; 01-21-2010 at 01:40 AM.
"3 stars and a sun"
My wife used to scan my phone... but now she doesn't care anymore!
Live every week like it's shark week
Time to get up to some mischief jbm!
Member
I'll solve your problem right now..
1 - put a password on your phone and make sure it auto locks.
If asked why, simply state "if my phone is lost or stolen, at least no one can use it to make calls"
2 - Save all "girls" numbers in your phone as a guys name.
*end thread*
Anabolic Member
it's bs. She has no right to go through your sh*t. I would not let it be. By not trusting me ...you are calling me a liar. To call me a liar is to question my honor. No one WITH honor would do that without proof or a good reason.
Snook~ AR Lounge Monitor
How was the sex?
I feel accomplished
pretty good...I gave her a good ravaging
4 positions
she seemed to enjoy it
except after she was kinda pissy when she looked at the clock. I guess she was up late the night before being sad. We had sex for over an hour straight so now it was after midnight. She had to be up for work the next day.
I should have put it in her butt for punishment.
Associate Member
i would never allow my woman to go through my phone and she knows it- if she did she knows she would get the boot
Anabolic Member
i have an idea...clear all your text messages...then have a friend send one saying "Anyone who goes through other people's property is a dirty, disrespectful b*tch who is definately not long term relationship material."
leave the phone out again. And she'll never look through it again.
I feel accomplished
I was actually really wishing I sent an outgoing message to someone saying "omg, my STD test came back positive for herpies."
Too late now, I think she learned her lesson.
100% American Beef
Trust me, she will do it again!
Anabolic Member
^^ LOL so true.
Anabolic Member
You may wanna leave your phone around where you would think she would be confirtable to play with it. And send that text out... Oh that would be a great thread update.
100% American Beef
Hell yes, find a day that you two didn't spend together (either at work or at school) then have a friend text you when you're together "I had a great time yesterday...Let me know when you can get away again!!!!" lol
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